We approached the main packhouse, but it felt more like I was approaching my doom.
I wish there were a way that I could lock my heart away. It didn’t need to be around for what happened next.
The GT pulled a slow stop. I stared at those big doors like they were the gates to my doom. The devil was inside, after all.
“Come on,” Kyle said as he slipped the car into park. I jumped. I don’t mean to flinch away from Kyle. He’s the good mate, the man who hasn’t done me wrong. The man who wanted to date me and let me in on his secrets. But I was still scared of the one who rejected me, who hurt me, who tried to break me. I was entrapped so profoundly within my fear that for a split second, the two had become one.
Kyle will keep us safe. Sapphire is the definition of bravery, she is as afraid as I am, but she’s willing to confront it anyway.
Let’s do this then. I had her support, and I had Kyle. And that's all I needed.
“Okay,” I sealed what felt like my fate with that one word. I pushed the door open hard. I shouldn’t treat such a nice car that way, but something about it made me feel a smidge braver, like the attitude could protect me somehow. Anything was worth a shot.
I marched up the stairs of that packhouse like I owned the place.
Lend me everything you have. I tell sapphire.
I will. I feel her strength become mine, our mind, body and spirit all syncing as one. I always knew that a wolf could lend their human their strength, but I never thought that I would need sapphire, too, outside the possibility of battle.
“Are you sure you want to confront him?” Kyle asked, a step behind me. I appreciated that he was willing to let me handle this my way. Most male wolves would have locked me away like a damsel, but he hasn't even made that suggestion.
“If he knows I’m here, then I don’t want to risk him attacking the pack over it. It’s better if we try to resolve this in house first. For the good of our people.” I say firmly. Kyle smiled goofily for a brief pause.
“What?” I can’t see what would make him happy in a time like this.
“You said our people.” He looked at me in a way that I couldn’t understand. “Your warming up to me.”
I have no idea what he could possibly mean by that. So far, he was the only one keeping the distance there. I could be doing more to fight it, but I liked the pace.
“Besides, we don't know if he's confident that you're here. He could just be going from pack. That's what I would do.”
I stopped and spun around.
“Do you think that’s possible?” Dad had said Declan shouldn’t be able to find me here.
“Why don’t you hide. Not so close that he can smell you but close enough that if I mind link you, you can come straight away.”
I did like that idea. If Declan wasn’t sure that I was here, then there was no reason to show him that I was.
“Okay. Where do I hide?”
“If you’re comfortable, would you like to hide in my room?” He's hesitant, but still, he offers.
A chance to spy on Kyle, hell yeah. I ignore Sapphire's comment. There is no way that I should snoop.
“Yeah, that’s perfect.”
He walked me to the same floor his office was on. At first, I did worry that Declan would certainly scent me, but his office was at the very end of the hall and kyles room was the first door. He spent a few minutes assuring me there was no way he could have smelt me.
Then he disappeared into the bathroom to scrub the me of him real quick.
You should go and take a peak.
Hell to the no. Goddess Sapphire, what if he caught us? I would die of mortification.
Oh, come on, you can’t die of embarrassment plus, he’s yours, that means you are allowed to look. She argued.
I was tempted, I’ll admit. He was so incredibly attractive. How could I not be?
If you start pleasuring yourself, do you think he will come out of the shower all wet, naked and hot for you? Do you think he’d come to finish the job? I blush. Where does she get these sinful ideas? There was no way.
I AM NOT DOING THAT. I screech at her, embarrassed.
Luckily the bathroom door pops open, and he’s fully dressed in a change of new clothes.
“I’ll mind link you. I can’t do it too much. Otherwise, he’ll notice. But if he’s determined you are here, do you want me to call you in to the office?”
I adore this man. He’s so thoughtful.
He’s a good mate.
“Only if it gets to the point threats start being made. I don’t want to see him if I don’t have to. But if I find out, he threatened the pack, and I could have at least tried to stop it but wasn’t given a chance, I’ll be distraught.” I don’t want to look for a fight, but I’ve made many promises to myself lately, and one of them was not to run away either.
“Alright.” He goes to kiss me on the forehead but stop himself. My feelings are a bit hurt, but I get it.
“I want to kiss you, but I can’t get your scent on me. I’ll see you soon.”
“That’s okay, I get it”, and I did.
He ducked out of the room, and I was suddenly left all alone in Kyles bedroom.
He had silky black sheets and a matching quilt set. I wonder if they slip off each other all the time. Would I slip and slide if I wore silk Pyjamas to bed?
We should find out. Again I ignore her hints.
In the far corner, I make my way over to the bookshelf. There were very few books, he had the lord of the rings series, and that was it. If I ever move in here, that would have to change drastically. The rest of the shelves were stuffed with old CDs. Some of these bands I had never even heard of. I pulled one of his old linken park albums of the shelf and popped it in the CD player. I skipped it to shadow of the day and hit repeat. I loved this song as an early teen. I grabbed one of the books at random and slipped under his soft sheets.
I love these sheets. Maybe I’ll ask Amy if she can get me some. I can’t even repeat the dirty, dirty suggestions Sapphire was making about how we could just convince Kyle to give us his.
As my eyes skimmed the first page of the second chapter Kyle finally mind linked me to come to his office.
He didn’t say if Declan was still there or not, but I assume he would have to be.
As I approach the office door, I let my hand rest on the handle.
Any good pep talks left in there? I ask my wolf.
Just the one. God and jump, Kyle, do it right in front of Declan. He will get the hint.
I couldn’t help but laugh at her silliness, which helped a lot. It helped calm me.
I strolled into that room as if I owned it.
I kept my head high, and not once did I look down. I stared at Declan right in his icy cold dead eyes and stopped next to Kyle.
“What do you want, Declan?” I snapped at him.
“To take my luna home.” he sounded so sincere, so sorry, but I know that's all a show now. I have seen who this man is already.
“Then why am I in this room? You can't be talking about me,” I explained calmly.
“But I am” he tried to take a step in my direction, and I took an equal one back. I was annoyed with myself for my show of weakness.
“You don't get to approach me” hopefully, my show of disgust will hide the moment of fear.
“Please, faith, let me explain.” I bit the inside of my cheek as I thought hard about what I should say to him next. I wasn't going to forgive him, and I don't think I ever would. Breaking the mate bond was by far the most painful thing I have ever experienced, and instead of being able to recover with my family, I was beaten and forced to run. Would any explanation ever make me feel better about that? Was it worth listening to?
We deserve to have answers. Sapphire was firm. She wanted to know.
I do too. I finally admit.
“Go ahead, but you should know that I won't be forgiving anyone.” I could see Kyle relax a little beside me. I almost forgot how much he had riding on this one meeting himself, and I was overwhelmed with guilt. He had to sit there and watch another man try and take his mate and not just any man: her first mate, her first love, her first and longest friend.
I’m yours. You don’t need to worry about him. Not now, not ever. I mind link, Kyle. We still had a long way to go, but for this, he has won me over.
“Can we talk alone, please? Some information I don’t want to share with strangers” he glared directly at Kyle.
What would you like me to do? Kyle mind links me. Apart of me wanted him to stay, but I also wanted him to go. I was torn between my want for support and my need to feel everything and say anything without Kyle being a witness to it.
Could you please just wait outside the door? I promise that I will mind link you if I need you.
He doesn’t look upset or even angry, and I am grateful. He stands from his chair, but before he can leave, I grab him by the hand and pull him towards me. He looks shocked but lets me anyway. I feel the mate bond working its magic along the palms of my hands, and my heart skips a few beats. I place a gentle Thankyou kiss upon kyles lips and scent him deeply.
There is a deep growl that tears its way through the room, but I don’t care. It doesn’t affect me.
I didn’t do it to make Declan jealous. I couldn’t care what he felt, not anymore. I did it because at that moment I needed my mate and I was going to take it.
Kyle winked at Declan. I wish he didn’t stir, but I also liked it; I felt like I was being bragged about and to feel wanted after everything was indescribable.
The door clicked shut, and I was once again alone in a room with Declan.
“So you are with him now whoreing yourself out?” Declan snaps. I don’t even flinch. I’m used to the cold.
“Say what you came here to say or leave” I gesture to the door.
“Your right. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I asked for a chance to explain, and that’s what I’m going to do. Whether you come home with me or not, I’m never going to stop trying.” Like his promises mean anything to me anymore.
“Just get on with it, Declan”, I finally snap.
AN: sorry for the late update. My partner organised a surprise Christmas visit with my family. I don’t get to see them often and so I took some time to spend with them. Would you like a Declan POV soon?