Chapter 16 Fractured Bonds
Tasha:
It had been four days since I had agreed to stay with Neel in his home. Four days of quiet, of safety, of the strange warmth that filled this house, warmth that seemed almost forbidden given everything I had endured. And yet, no matter how much I tried to focus on training, on controlling the storm that lurked beneath my skin, there was one presence that clawed at me, fraying my calm, sharpening the hunger of my wolf: Tara.
I stepped carefully down the stairs, already feeling the pull of the morning light through the tall windows. The scent of coffee hit me first, rich and dark, but not comforting….it was too ordinary, too domestic. My pulse quickened when I saw her.
Tara was in the kitchen. Standing near the stove, one hand resting lightly on the counter, the other holding a mug. She looked effortlessly human….calm, unafraid, and impossibly… present. Her long hair fell over her shoulder as she glanced at Neel, who was perched casually at the kitchen island, reading some documents. My stomach twisted. My wolf growled faintly, but I swallowed the sound, forcing my face into something resembling composure.
Four days. That’s all it had been. Four days and yet, the sight of her here made my pulse spike as if it had been years since someone had dared to come this close to him. The wolf inside me hissed quietly. He isn’t hers. He is yours.
I froze at the top of the stairs, pretending to be just another person entering the kitchen, but every nerve in my body was screaming. Her energy was human…warm, inviting….but it wasn’t meant for me. I wanted to scream at her to leave, to vanish from this house, but my mouth wouldn’t obey.
Neel looked up at me with a small, calm smile. “Good morning,” he said softly. “Coffee’s already made. Breakfast will be ready soon.”
I nodded, forcing a polite smile that didn’t reach my eyes. My gaze flicked to Tara again. She noticed me, her smile polite, her voice warm. “Good morning, Tasha. I didn’t expect to see you up so early.”
I swallowed, my throat tight. “I… I couldn’t sleep,” I muttered, the words bitter with unspoken tension. The wolf beneath my skin growled faintly, stirring at her nonchalant warmth.
Neel, oblivious to the maelstrom inside me, gestured to the counter. “Coffee’s hot. Help yourself if you want. Tara, I thought you had an early meeting?”
Tara nodded. “Yes, I have to leave in a few minutes. I just wanted a quick coffee before heading out.” She glanced at me again, her smile calm, unbothered. “I hope I’m not disturbing anything. It’s fine if I am. I’ll be gone shortly.”
Disturbing? The word echoed inside me like a knife. She doesn’t even know. She doesn’t even care. She isn’t afraid of me. How dare she exist in the same space as him.
I forced my lips into a controlled smile, stepping into the kitchen. My hands itched to close the distance between her and me, to assert something… anything….my presence. But I settled for standing near the counter, sipping my coffee, forcing my pulse to calm.
Neel watched both of us, his expression unreadable. “Breakfast will be ready soon. Tara, do you need anything else before you leave?”
“No, thank you,” she said brightly. “I’ll grab my bag and be on my way.”
She moved with effortless ease, and I watched, my stomach twisting. My wolf stirred violently now, whispering, hissing, pushing, Claim him. He is yours. You won’t let her touch him.
I clenched my fists, swallowing the surge of dark emotion. Not yet. Not now. I had to control it… for now.
She collected her things and approached the door, glancing at me once more. “It’s nice to meet you properly, Tasha. I hope we can get along while you’re here.”
Get along? The words were poison to me. My lips twitched into a small, sweet smile, masking the storm inside. “Of course. I’ll do my best,” I said, voice deceptively soft, almost human.
She left, closing the door behind her, and a faint quiet settled over the kitchen. My wolf hissed in disappointment, frustration, but also anticipation. The human wasn’t gone from my thoughts; she lingered, a shadow stretching across the floor, stirring possessiveness that made my chest ache.
I leaned against the doorframe of the kitchen, watching Neel move with quiet precision.
Even in his casual night suit, the way he shifted, the hum in his voice, the ease of his movements…..it tugged at me in ways I didn’t want to acknowledge. My wolf stirred, low and hungry. He had been my tether since I had returned from the edge of death, the one anchor in a world that had rejected me. But the pull, the heat of attachment, was terrifying in its intensity. Every fiber of me wanted to bind him, and yet, a small part of my mind knew I needed to appear… normal. Human. Safe.
“You won’t have something for yourself?" I started a discussion to cut the awkward silence.
“I had coffee earlier." He said without turning back.
“When?"
“Early Morning,” he said, glancing over his shoulder at me with a gentle smile. “ Now I’ll eat something though. I also made coffee again. Thought we could eat before you head out to your exercises.”
I tilted my head, pretending casual curiosity. “Coffee in the early morning? You even drink coffee this early?”
He laughed softly, a warm, grounding sound. “I do, for a few minutes before I actually start thinking about anything important. It’s my ritual.”
I nodded, feeling a pang of something I couldn’t name. Comfort? Longing? The wolf didn’t care about names….it only wanted, wanted, wanted.
“I… I’ll sit,” I said, sliding a chair out. My voice sounded steadier than I felt. “You always make it seem so… normal. Even when everything else is chaos.”
He set a steaming mug in front of me. “You’ve been through more chaos than anyone I know. You deserve some normalcy.” His eyes met mine, steady, unflinching, and I felt the sharp tug in my chest.
Mine.
I sipped the coffee, trying to calm the storm inside me. But my senses betrayed me. The faint scent of Tara lingered in the air, a human warmth, calm, familiar. My lips curled slightly, a flicker of resentment crossing my mind. She has no right to be here. He is mine.
“Something on your mind?” Neel asked. His voice was soft, but attentive.
I tilted my head, feigning innocence. “No… nothing.” But the wolf beneath my skin hissed quietly. She exists. She touches him. She laughs with him. She smells of him.
He frowned, reaching across the table. “Tasha… I can feel you holding back. You’re not upset, are you?”
I swallowed the bitter edge rising in my throat. “No, I’m fine. Just… thinking about training later.” My hand brushed against my thigh, the other pressing slightly to keep my pulse steady. My wolf growled low, sensing the tension in the room, the threat of a rival….even if it was just a human.
Neel’s gaze softened, but there was a question lingering there. “You know… you don’t have to hide everything from me. I can handle it.”
A dangerous thought flared. Yes, you can handle me. But can you handle what I want? I leaned closer, smiling faintly, my voice sweet, masking the possessive undertone. “I’m fine… really. I just… don’t want to make breakfast complicated.”
He chuckled. “Breakfast doesn’t have to be complicated, Tasha. But you….sometimes you make everything complicated for yourself.”
I felt my lips twitch into a small, dark smile. Complicated was exactly what I wanted to be. I wanted him looking at me, thinking about me, wondering where the edge of my control ended.
The morning stretched lazily, but my wolf’s whispers never ceased. Every movement of Neel’s, every sound he made, called to me in a way that I had never experienced with anyone. I wanted to wrap him into my world, my darkness, my chaos…and yet, I feared the consequences. I feared how much of me he could truly handle.
When we finally moved to the table, eating breakfast, the wolf stirred again as I glanced at the fridge. A craving I hadn’t felt since the night I almost lost myself rose sharply. Raw meat. I couldn’t explain why, but the scent and thought filled my senses, demanding. My pulse quickened.
Neel noticed. “Tasha…” His brow furrowed, hesitation and concern in his voice. “You’re… hungry for raw meat?”
I nodded slightly, trying to act casual. “Yes. I can’t explain it. It just… calls to me.”
His hands paused mid-motion, then he opened the fridge and produced a small portion, handing it to me carefully. “Here. Eat this slowly. I’ll make sure you’re safe.”
I took it, sensing his unease but masking it. He thinks he’s protecting me. He doesn’t know he’s feeding the wolf inside me.
We sat in silence for a while, eating, the morning sunlight filtering in through the windows. The warmth of the kitchen, the hum of domestic life, it made me ache. I wanted to belong here, but the wolf snarled at the calmness, at the safety, at the presence of someone else…Tara….unseen but lingering in memory.
We spent the hours together sitting at the table, unaware of the time. It was almost past noon when the door opened again and Tara came back. My mood turned sour to see her back soon.
“Back so early today?" Neel questioned her while looking at her lovingly.
“Yeah, I attended the meeting and there was not much work today so I came back. I wanted to spend some time with you…and Tasha of course. It would be good to give her some company, yeah?" She looked at me with a positive smile and Neel nodded.
“Actually yes! That’s a good idea, Tasha is feeling down these days so we need to hype her up babe."
My mouth turned bitter at his endearment for her. I gulped the jealousy down and tamed myself. We sat together at the table. Tara chatted about her work, her life, and then turned to Neel. “I remember when we first met… you were helping that injured wolf by the park. I never imagined then that you’d bring so many lost souls home over the years. You have a habit of it, don’t you?”
My hands clenched, hidden beneath the table. Lost souls? He brought her home too. Not just me. Lost soul my ass!
I forced a laugh, soft, compliant. “Yes… he does. He cares too much.” My voice was sweet, masking the possessive storm inside me.
Tara smiled warmly at me, oblivious to the darkness swirling in my chest. “I’m glad he’s caring like that. I think he gets it from his mother. But I’m also glad he has someone here to guide him… someone strong. That must be why you’re here, right?”
I swallowed a sharp edge of anger and desire, forcing myself to nod. “Yes. I… I’m learning control. He’s helping me.”
Neel, unaware of the mental chess playing out between the wolf and me, reached across the table and squeezed my hand. “Tasha’s making progress. I’m proud of her. But she has her moments… moments of instability.”
Tara looked at me with an encouraging smile. “I can see that. But it’s good she has you, Neel. She’ll be safe.”
Safe. The word sparked a dangerous thought. Safe from her? Or from me? I let the smile linger, masking the maelstrom inside, pretending to be the polite, calm guest.
The conversation shifted. Tara asked about my past, my stay, my training. I told her selectively, keeping my darker instincts hidden. Yet the wolf growled softly whenever she laughed at Neel’s jokes, whenever she touched a mug he’d set down, whenever she glanced at him.
After a while, she excused herself to unpack some work papers, leaving the two of us in quiet. I watched him, the pull inside me growing, the wolf whispering commands I dared not follow out loud.
“Neel…” I murmured, leaning slightly closer. “Why… why do I feel like I can’t… I can’t let anyone near you?”
He sighed, brushing his hair back. “Because… you care. Because you feel it deeply. Because you have a trauma response of abandonment. But Tasha… you can’t let the wolf decide everything. You’ll hurt yourself, or others, if you don’t control it.”
I nodded, pretending to listen, but inside I was calculating, planning, feeling the heat of possessiveness surge. No one will have him. No one.
I forced myself to smile again, polite, human. “I… I’ll try. I promise.”
But as I watched Tara return, her cheerful energy undimmed, the wolf whispered again. You can’t trust her. She isn’t yours. Claim him.
I felt a thrill, dangerous and dark, and knew, deep down, that the days ahead would be a battle…not just to control myself, but to ensure no one took him from me.
And as I sat there, sipping coffee, masking the fire within me, a single thought burned bright and terrifying.
I cannot let her stay. I cannot let anyone stay between us.
I watched Tara laughing softly at something Neel said, and my eyes narrowed. No one will come between us. Not her. Not anyone. I will make sure of that!