Selene's POV
I hear the door shut as Cynth leaves.
I feel the tears still streaming down my face how could they not trust me how could they think 'I’m so defenceless and for Arti to use her beta voice on me.
"I don't think they see you as defenceless Sel, they care about you they always Arti just needed you to listen ""How can you take their side in this Seleste, they are caging you in as well as me " how could she agree with them.
"I am not agreeing with them Selene! they are doing this for you there are so many things you don't yet understand you have to trust that they are doing what’s best for you and listen to them”.
"Listen to them? in one conversation they've taken away all the freedom we had. I don't know about listening to them, but I also don't want to listen to you anymore either " With that I blocked Seleste.
I did not need to hear her reasoning, she would not understand since out parents died my sister have watched over me and I will be forever great-full for that, but they when will they stop seeing me as a fragile child. In 3 weeks will be 21 I will bond fully with Seleste and what happens when I find my mate will they stop me from seeing them too?
I finally stand up I need to find dot and tell her what is happening, I walk past my mirror then take a step back in front of it, staring at myself my hair is a mess my eyes red and swollen. I am not going anywhere until I take a shower.
After the shower I grab some clothes from my wardrobe a pair of black work out leggings and a plain black tight-fitting T. As I am getting dressed, I mind link Dot.
"Hey Dot, where are you I have some stuff to tell you”.
"I'm in the kitchen Sel Dinner is almost ready I’ll see you down here? " At the sound of the word dinner my stomach growls I realize this is probably the first time in my life I've missed a meal.
"Sure, thing Dot I’ll be 5 mins " I close the link.
Making my way down the stairs I walk past some other members of the pack I smile pleasantly and say a few quiet hello’s. Most people in this pack know my sisters and I my mother and father were well loved in the pack and now my sisters are both high ranking that respect just continued. I always feel like they are waiting to see what I will do; will I live up to my parents or my sisters? Maybe it is all in my head.
I am just about to turn unto the kitchen when I feel my arm myself being pulled into another room, I’m about to flip my lid when I see Ash staring down at me. Ash and I were friends as children when we turned 18 ash had a growth spurt and went from this weedy small kid to a 6'4 bundle of muscles. Hess not bad to look at all... he has jet black hair; tanned skin and he is currently wearing a pair of jean shorts and well fitted T shirt that is clinging to his muscles in all the right places. I am bought back to reality when I hear him speak.
"Liking what you see Sel, could be yours soon " He says these words with such smugness that I crash back down to earth and remember why we no longer really speak.
"What do you want Ash? I was on my way to eat and frankly I’m getting kind of hangry" I say this as I roll my eyes and look away from him waiting for him to respond.
"why are you being this way Sel you know we are going to be mated soon anyway, I just thought you might want to get a little practice in “I shudder internally at his words.
"Oh Ash. Firstly, what makes you so sure we are going to be mates? secondly what makes you think I want you after you've slept with so many other people, I think I’d rather be sick " As I say these words, I see his pupils go dark. He grabs hold of me and pushes me up against the closed door I whimper as my back hits the door handle and he Is pressing his body against mine placing his head in my neck and then whispering in my ear.
"How can I ignore you when you walk around in outfits like this so tight, I can practically see you naked " he runs his hand up my leg as he speaks in 3 weeks’ time Sel you won’t have a say in the matter, you'll be mine to do with as I please. you will realize you should have taken me up on my offer. It’s only a matter of time " With the last words he places a kiss on the spot where I am to be marked making me grimace with disgust.
He pulls away from and leaves the room, every encounter I have had with Ash since he turned 21 4 months ago has been similar for some reason, he is so convinced we are destined to be together he won’t let it lie. I think even at this point if his actual mate stared him in the face he would not notice.
I straighten up my clothes I step out of the door and directly into the kitchen the room is heaving with members of the pack all talking about the new training and the tighter security. Some seem happy to serve the pack more others seem scared of what is coming. There are also a few who seem indifferent to the idea those that have fought in battle already and know how it goes. Not that anyone has said there will be a battle but that is the general feel.
I look at the huge spread on the table made by the pack cook Sibyl I see her from across the room cooking more steaks in the pan and mouth a thank you to her before I tuck in. She acknowledges my thanks with smile and then dig in. Food as always been my favourite hobby not to cook but I sure love to eat it, I load my place with steak, pizza, French fries seasoned with Sibyls chili salt, as I move around the table, I spot a favourite dish Sibyl makes jerk chicken thighs I load 5 of them onto a plate a grab a load of veggies and salad and move away to get a drink.
As I do I feel a pair of eyes on me I look up to see Ryan staring at me and giggling while I try to manoeuvre my plate full of food and my drink without dropping anything, through his laughter he gives me a half smile, it’s quite clear he’s spoken to Arti about her conversation earlier I don't want to make things awkward with him, so I smile back and make my way to the dining room.
I enter the room looking for Dot I know she would have saved me a space; I search around and see her towards the back I head over there. Dot always looks so well put together she is in a flowery sun dress her blond her swaying in high ponytail. As I am walking towards her, I notice there are others around her staring she really has no idea the affect she has on people she would much rather read a book.
I take a seat next to her "Hey dot what did you find out?" I ask in a hushed voice.
She smiles at me, but she looks nervous "So my dad told me about the attacks on the silver moon and that after they ran, they could not find them in the forest. My dad said that I have to start training now too just in case. I'm worried Sel " I see the panic in her face I try to reassure her as she tends to get in her own head.
"I'm sure its fine dot it’s probably just for safety the rogues have not attacked us, we just don't want to appear weak to the Silver Moon pack I’m sure that's all it is”.
This seems to calm her, and we continue eating in silence I tell her about what Arti and Cynth told me careful to exclude the part where I’m not allowed out to run. After a while we finish eating and we carry on talking about trivial things Dots birthday is a week before mine and she is so excited to find her mate she wants to settle onto mated life as soon as she can. I cannot say I’m sold on the idea, but I smile and nod along as she describes what she wants her life too to be.
After an hour or so the dining room starts to clear, and I head back to my room I walk past Arti and Cynth on the way, but I do not acknowledge them I’m still pissed off I stop past them and hear Cynth faintly call my name. When I get into my room, I Take a seat in the bean bag in front of the window and stare up at the moon, I feel a twitch of guilt as I remember I have not unblocked Seleste I close my eyes.
"Seleste? "I say quietly.
"Oh, now you want to talk to me it’s only like 5 hours to late!" I can tell she I mad and is going to take some convincing to ask her what I want to do next.
"I'm sorry Seleste I was hoping we could make up I know I took my anger out on you I’m sorry " I feel her softening.
"So, what is it you want Sel”.
"I want to go for a run, once last time before I follow Arti and Cynth’s orders " I feel her getting excited about stretching her legs.
"You promise it will be only once then we will listen to them it’s for the best”.
I almost feel bad that she has been so easy to persuade but we both know we need this.
"she agrees " I smile great let us go!
I open the bedroom window careful not to make too much noise, I balance walking along the ledge until I can grab hold of the drainpipe and scale down. My feet hit the floor and head towards the forest I know there are more patrols about to so I am careful to avoid them going a little deeper in than I normal would. when I am certain its clear I undress folding my clothes and leaving them by a tree.
I look up to the moon and thank the goddess for the gift crouch down and begin to shift, I hear my bones cracking and withing a minute I have completed the shift. I rub my back on the tree to mark where I left my clothes and then head run into towards the mountains letting Seleste take control as we go.