Something Has to Change

Something Has to Change
Ricardo

It definitely didn’t feel like my lucky night. Then again, it rarely did—at least not when the matter involved Alicia Guimarães.

I could feel the eyes at the table on me more than I could see them. Angel’s frozen surprise, Henrique’s barely disguised delight, Lucas’s sharpened curiosity.

I should have been used to the way she could throw my peace into chaos, but the moment I saw her walk into the bar, the world tilted off its axis. The red dress she wore was short, daring, and almost cruelly flattering against her pale skin. Long legs, steady stride, confident gaze, everything about her disarmed me and reminded me how far I still was from getting over her.

I took a deep breath, trying to look indifferent. But my heart, that traitor, reacted before reason could rein it in.

She was walking toward our table.

“Hi, Henrique,” she said, with that calculated smile of hers—the kind that knew exactly the effect it had.

She made a point of ignoring me completely, turning her back as if I weren’t even there.

“Hi, Alicia. Nice to see you here,” I replied anyway, trying to hold on to the civility she so clearly lacked.

She pretended not to hear, focusing all her attention on my cousin instead. I swallowed hard and lifted the glass to my lips, pretending nonchalance while the bitter whiskey burned down my throat.

“A little manners never hurt anyone, Alicia,” Henrique commented with a teasing half-smile.

She shot him a reproachful look, then turned away and walked toward a group on the other side of the bar, leaving only her sweet perfume behind. Her laugh, a loud, artificial sound- cut through the air moments later. It was an act; I knew that. Everything about her was a carefully choreographed act. I stayed still for a few seconds, trying to compose my expression.

Being at Lilo’s—a bar I would never have chosen on my own—hadn’t been part of my plan for the night. In fact, the original plan had been very different.

A few hours earlier, I’d been at my uncle and aunt’s house, Henrique and Nicolas’s parents, enduring one of those Saturday family dinners. After a draining week, all I wanted was a little silence. But silence was something Henrique never allowed for long.

He’d jumped up from the couch, that mischievous grin already on his face.
“As for me, being young, gorgeous, and single, I’m heading out. And you, cousin, should come with me,” he said, spreading his arms wide. “Let’s go enjoy the finer things in life!”

I rolled my eyes.
“What’s the club of the night?”

“None,” he laughed. “We’re going somewhere we don’t risk running into Alicia.”

I raised a skeptical eyebrow.
“And where would that be?”

“Lilo’s,” he said, like he was announcing a masterstroke.

He wasn’t wrong. Alicia never showed up anywhere people mixed without status, without display cases to be admired in. And for a brief moment, I thought maybe it was a good idea. I needed a change of scene, to see different faces—or maybe I just wanted to prove to myself that I no longer cared.

“Fine. But I’m taking my car,” I said. “That way, when I’ve had enough, I can leave guilt-free.”

Henrique laughed.
“Deal. I plan to drink until I forget my own name, so I’ll grab a cab later.”

I nodded. The truth was, I needed the distraction.

Work at Construtora Alcântara had been consuming nearly every hour of my life. Ever since the council approved the affordable housing project, I’d practically been living at the office. It was a social initiative—ambitious, mine from the very start—and it had faced more resistance than I cared to admit. Being named lead architect was an honor, yes, but also a burden.

Still, the intensity of work kept me sane. The deeper I dove into numbers, reports, and meetings, the less time I had to think about Alicia.

And now, here at Lilo’s, seeing her in front of me, I realized how useless that effort had been. She still got to me.

The bar, which had felt cozy moments ago, suddenly seemed far too small. The amber lights reflected off her dress, and the soft music in the background mocked my attempts to stay composed.

It was then that Angel and Lucas brought me back to reality. The couple exchanged affectionate glances across the table, and somehow their presence always reminded me that love could exist, even after chaos.

They were laughing at something Henrique said, and for a brief moment, I even smiled. But then I felt Alicia’s gaze on our table again. She was watching Henrique discreetly, over her shoulder, while pretending to talk to another man.



I got home to my apartment, located in one of São Paulo’s upscale neighborhoods, and tossed my car keys onto the glass console by the door. The force was stronger than I’d intended, and the sound of shattering glass echoed through the quiet space.

I exhaled heavily. I needed a way to let out that frustration, but the options were limited. I didn’t like working out, yoga never interested me, and sex was definitely off the table at the moment. In other words, I was screwed.

My history with Alicia, if it could even be called that, had dragged on for years. We’d met as kids, attending the same prestigious school in São Paulo, the kind only children of the city’s elite could afford.

Alicia was three years younger, so we’d never been in the same class. Still, when she hit her teens and I was about to graduate, I noticed that spoiled, arrogant girl, and, ironically, I saw something of myself in her.

Since then, I’d been trying to catch her attention. But every effort, over ten long years, had been in vain. Even when we dated for a brief three months, I never felt she truly wanted me. She treated me like a trained dog—always ready to obey, to beg for scraps of affection.

It was humiliating to admit, but it was the truth. Looking back now, I believe she only dated me to provoke Henrique. Because no matter how many men Alicia flirted with in our social circle, her eyes always sought his. And I… I’d always known it.

I was in love with that woman, but I wasn’t blind. Every man in our circle seemed welcome in Alicia’s bed, except me. While I loved her with a kind of sick devotion, she nurtured a silent obsession for my cousin. And as far as I could tell, I was the only one who noticed.

I didn’t believe Henrique had any interest in her; he wasn’t that type, and I knew him too well. But I had no intention of pointing that out either. I didn’t want to be the bearer of bad news or the resentful cousin.

I grabbed the whiskey bottle and poured another glass. If I hadn’t managed to get drunk at Lilo’s, I’d finish the job right there. I wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway.

I took the first sip, feeling the bitterness burn its way down, punishing every memory I still had of her. Pathetic—that’s what it was. I was a fool, and like every other night I thought of Alicia, I convinced myself this was just one more failure to add to the collection.

And right then, with the bitter taste of whiskey on my tongue, I realized something inside me had to change.