Chapter 88 - Daddy Dominant's Good Girl

“You shouldn’t look at me like that,” I said. My cheeks burned as I felt the chill of the air on my breasts and quickly closed the robe over my body. I couldn’t push back the memories of what it had been like to have his hands all over me. My pulse raced as I cursed the warm pulling inside of my abdomen.

“I know,” Ellis said, nodding his understanding. “But, you have such an exquisite body. And this is the body that gave me my son.”

I held my breath at the unexpected sentiment.

“You’re not my boyfriend. Bennett is.” I reminded myself as well as him. Shaking my head, I turned my eyes from him as I moved to get off of the bed.

“Bennett isn’t your boyfriend. I know that for a fact.”

“What do you think you know?” I scooted closer to the edge and stood up.

Ellis moved in front of me, his gentle breath floating over my face. I looked up at him, swallowing hard as our lips were a moment apart.

“I know what you look like when you’re in love. I remember the look in your eyes when you looked upon me with love and affection,” he explained in a smooth, cool voice.

“You haven’t known me for five years,” I heard my voice break as I felt the pain and loneliness of those five years slam into me. I fought to maintain my composure and side stepped Ellis to head for the door.

Ellis grabbed my arm to stop me and I shot him a cold glare. “Let me go, Ellis. You don’t know anything about me any more. Not what I went through and definitely not how the h*ll I feel.”

“You’re right,” he said, his eyes penetrated into mine, mirroring the pain and loss I felt deep inside. “There are so many wonderful things in your life you have to fight for, don't waste your energy fighting to convince me of this one thing that I know is a lie.”

“It’s not—”

“Olivia,” he said my name with a mixture of emotions I could not name. “I will regret every moment I wasn't able to be with you. Maybe I don’t know you any more, but baby, I do know that when you look at Bennett, it isn’t the look of a woman in love.”

I looked away from his eyes. I wasn’t sure if it bothered me more that he called me out like that or that he was right.

“He’s been good to me!” I declared.

“Ha! He’s been good to you? Out of the goodness of his heart, I’m sure.”

“That is none of your business.”

“A man being nice to you isn’t a reason to give him your loyalty or affection,” Ellis shot back. “Had you stayed and told me about Ken, Olivia, I would have been so much more than just good to you.”

“Ellis, how was I supposed to trust you with my child when you had already been so clumsy with my heart?”

“Because he’s my child, too.”

“I never said that he was your child!”

He sucked in a shocked breath and let it out slowly. The space and time and silence between us stretched into an eternity before he spoke again in a controlled tone. “Then tell me right here right now, Olivia. No more games. No more lies. Is Ken mine?”

His steady gaze was on the borderline between anger and indifference. I bit my lower lip. I was standing on a ledge and he knew it. I couldn’t lie and he knew it. “Yes,” I answered.

I was taken aback by the sheer relief that washed over him. He released my gaze and took several steps back. Soaking in the triumph of the truth.

Ellis gave a triumphant smirk and shook his head. “So much effort to lie to me. Why? Why did you hide him away from me in the first place? Olivia you will never understand how many times my heart has broken thinking about everything I would have done to stand by you and raise Ken,” Ellis said.

He put his hands on his hips, his face hardening. “Why?”

I moistened my lips and looked around the room.

“Nancy and Claire,” I said simply.

“I already told you that Claire was Nancy’s sister,” Ellis said quickly, his voice cooling considerably.

“I know. And I know that I made a mistake when jumping to conclusions in regards to Claire being pregnant with your child. I should have asked you but I was already concerned about Nancy,” I explained. I couldn’t look at Ellis while I told him this.

“Concerned… hmm. Why?” Ellis probed when I didn’t continue right away.

I swallowed into a tight throat. Ellis had assured me again and again that Nancy was in his past. He even remodeled her bedroom. Still, we’d never really talked about their relationship.

“You refused to talk about her. There is so much mystery around who she was and your relationship. When I asked about her, you simply left me guessing. If you don’t like the conclusions I came to, then you should have told me everything about her and your relationship,” I met Ellis’s eyes and glowered, hoping he’d see the seriousness in my eyes.

Ellis sighed and ran his tongue over his top teeth. “The fact that she is someone from my past that is never coming back wasn’t enough?” he asked.

“No, it wasn’t then and it isn’t now. Not this time.” I shook my head.

“Very well.” Ellis crossed his arms and began pacing back and forth in front of me. “Nancy worked with me around seven years ago. She was… interesting to me. I found her attractive, yes, and innocent. I would say that I had feelings for her but she was resistant,” Ellis smirked and shook his head.

It was like he was happily remembering their relationship. My stomach shifted. Maybe I didn’t want to know the truth, after all.

“Since we worked together, we grew very close. I met her family at company events as well. I helped her family get involved in some investments and they were grateful, thus forming a close family friendship,” he continued.

“When did the two of you… get together?” I asked slowly. I glanced at Ellis again. I wasn’t sure if he even remembered I was there.

He was still pacing back and forth, slowly, his shoulders stiff and his chin high. He was always so strong and graceful.

“It took a long time. Sometimes, I think that her resistance only made me more determined. We went on a few dates but she always kept me at a distance. Unfortunately, our relationship ended before it could really get started because Nancy was killed…”

“Oh,” I gasped. I looked down at my lap.

“Nancy is long in my past. I fell in love with you for a lot of different reasons, and none of them had anything to do with her,” he ended.

“This isn’t easy for me to believe, Ellis,” I said, standing up for emphasis. “You kept an entire bedroom for her as a shrine. She was obviously very special to you. I don’t know if she will ever be in your past.”

“She is,” Ellis said quickly. He grabbed my hands and lifted them to his lips, kissing my knuckles.

“It doesn’t feel like it. It feels like she’ll always be between us somehow,” I muttered.

“Olivia, I have lived a rich and full life. I do have a past. Have you been thinking this whole time that I haven’t had women I’ve cared for before?” he asked, a smirk flickering across his lips.

“She isn’t just ‘some woman’ you cared for. I mean, you really cared for her. I can’t help looking around this house and wondering what else Nancy touched. Are you going to be comparing us when we are in bed together? Will it even be my face you see?” I asked, pulling my hands away from him.

Five years of frustration boiled in my blood. I’d asked myself those questions over and over again but across the ocean, I’d never had a chance to ask them directly. I twisted my hands together, my nostrils flaring as I confronted my anxiety and anger out loud for the first time.

“Olivia, please,” Ellis said. He put his hands on my shoulders, his voice firm and smooth. “Listen to me. Nancy and I never shared a bed. We never slept together.”

“But she’s been in your dungeon! She had a bedroom here!” I threw my arms out to the sides.

“That’s true, yes. But there was nothing sexual about our relationship. I told you, she was special because of the work she did with me and because of the relationship I had with her family. But everything you and I have shared has always been so much more.” His eyes were so soft as he looked at me, so full of truth.

“But I…”

“Darling, listen to me. I might always have a place in my heart for Nancy, to remember her fondly. She did save my life. I owe her sacrifice and her family so much and I’ll never forget that,” he explained.

I looked away from his face. His words were so honest and sad. I couldn’t fault him for remembering someone that died to save him. Was I really that petty?

“However, what I felt for her romantically and the few dates we went on are all long forgotten. Why I remember her has nothing to do with how I felt about her. And what I feel for you is… nothing can touch that,” he said.

“Are you sure?” I asked, widening my eyes as I looked at Ellis. I was on the verge of giving in and melting against him. My knees trembled.

“I am,” Ellis nodded. He brought his hands to my face and brushed his thumbs across my cheeks.

“I hid Ken from you because I didn’t want him to bear the shame of finding out that I was just a replacement for who you really loved. Or that you had another child, his age, with another woman that looked like me,” I said softly, my eyes pricking with tears.

“Given everything you saw and thought, I can understand that,” he purred, running his thumb over my lower lip.

“Y-you forgive me?” I gasped.

“Of course,” he said smoothly. He chuckled and leaned in, pressing a quick kiss on my lips.

My knees buckled and I nearly collapsed under my own weight. Ellis caught me in his arms and held me against his chest. I whimpered and clung to his shirt.

“Olivia, can you forgive me for holding you at a distance and letting you believe all those horrible things?” he asked.

I sighed against his chest, my fingers curling tighter around his shirt. I just nodded. I couldn’t form words.

Ellis tipped my chin up and forced me to meet his gaze. My breath trembled and my heart raced a million miles in my chest.

“Wh-what do you really want from me, Ellis?” I asked.

“I just want you to let me love you, Olivia.”