Chapter 103 Love Me or Kill Me

Chapter 103 Love Me or Kill Me
Killian 
My wound had reopened again. I sighed, wrapping my knuckles up with a fresh band-aid. I had punched the bathroom wall to vent out all my frustration from yesterday. When I was done band-aiding, I went back to my desk and pulled my laptop open. I’ve been staring at the screen for the past hour. Unfortunately, I can’t concentrate, nor can I stop the thoughts from running through my mind.
Thoughts of her.
I pressed my face into both palms, exhaling sharply. I went out to look for her yesterday, only to find her on the rooftop after hours of running around the building. I had been terrified that she had left the house, and I wouldn’t be able to find her until I found her up there.
The relief that washed over me was more than the courage I had to walk up to her, so I just stood there and watched her, hoping she wouldn’t notice me, and thankfully, she didn’t.
She must have found out her mother was murdered. Late news, but finally. That woman had been a torn in her flesh since she was younger. She had caused her too much pain; they had treated her like she was a tool. Raven deserves freedom, and now she has it.
I don’t know where she is now. She didn’t come back into the bedroom, and I had checked the house at night but couldn’t find her.
I know she was still in the house, but I just don’t know where. Even if I did, I still don’t have the guts to face her.
Her words kept echoing in my head with flashes of her tear-stricken face.
‘ You’re selfish!’
I sighed heavily again, letting my head fall to the desk.
I am selfish ….I’m a selfish asshole.
I think about no one but my fucking self.
I had thought about only myself and how it affected me when she was feeling what I was feeling, and even worse.
I was still in that lane of thought when a knock echoed outside the study. I straightened up immediately, hoping it was her. Maybe she wanted to hit me or throw something at me and say she hates me, then I’ll hold her and beg her to forgive me.
But I was wrong.
The door clicked open, and the butler walked in. My shoulders dropped instantly.“ Sir, she’s about to leave.” He said, and I sprang to my feet.
My eyes flashed to the wall clock. It was 8:17 am.
I panicked, my heart beating erratically.“Now?”
He nodded, and I dashed out the door, running as fast as I could.
I can’t just let her leave like that. We still have to talk things through. By the time I got to the front door, the car had already driven past the gate.
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
I was panting as I stared at the car. The butler came up behind me.“ Sir, Alex is on his way here.”
I furrowed my brows.” Alex? How did he know where I am?”
The butler bowed a little.” I’m not sure, sir, but he told me to inform you that he’ll be here in less than an hour.”
I went back into the house and into my study, my blood boiling. Alex is probably here to pester the fuck out of me, and honestly, right now I’m not in the mood, so I ordered my butler not to let him into the study.
Half an hour later, there was commotion outside the study. I recognized the voice; it was Alex. He was yelling at the butler to get out of his way, that he had to whoop my ass.
I snorted.
Idiot!
The next second, the door burst open with my butler stumbling behind him.
“ Ohh… look who it is!” He beamed, spreading out his arms.“ The fucking bastard who can’t keep a woman!”
Tch. Moron!
I ignored him and maintained my gaze on the blank screen. My fingers were itching to punch something or someone, preferably his face.
“Don’t you dare ignore me, Killian! ” He slammed his hands on the desk, knocking over the tiny vase on the desk.
I didn’t flinch but slowly lifted my gaze.“ Fuck off!”
He chortled.“ I’m going to beat some sense into your fucking skull, huh?”
I was about to splurt some nonsense when his jaw connected with my chin.
Tch.
I rubbed a hand on my jaw, my eyes narrowing. He moved around the desk and grabbed my lapels.
“ You bastard!” He chuckled.“ When I’m done with you, you’ll fly back to that goddamn city, look for your wife, and when you find her… you’ll go on your fucking knees and tell her you’re a dead man if she doesn’t take you back.”
A bitter smile spread across my face.“She’s not here, but I’m not dead yet!”
He clenched his fist and punched me across the face. I groaned, stumbling backwards.
He rushed after me again, grabbed my lapels, and punched me hard across the face . The metallic taste of blood filled my tongue. I think I just bit on my tongue.
And the funny thing?
I couldn’t fight back. It’s not that I don’t want to; I’ll beat up Alex on a normal day, but right now, my muscles are too numb to move.
He picked me up by the lapels again, our rough breaths fanning each other. “ Listen to me, you fool!” He snarled.“ I’ll sound this one last time, and if you still don’t get it, I’ll put a bullet through your skull.”
I chuckled.“ Yeah, I think I want that bullet.”
He slapped me across the face, and I winced. Alex got some nerves.
" You…Killian Larson Markov…you love that woman, and if you don’t go get her? You’ll hang yourself on a tree.” He spat, his eyes blazing.
I stared at him, my heart hammering wildly against my ribs.
I love her…I know I do. Or I would have let this circle end years ago. I’ve loved her since I was a teenager. I loved her even harder each time she listened to her mother and broke my teenage heart.
I never stopped loving her.
“ She’s gone, Alex.” My voice broke.
He slapped me across the face again, and this time I felt the pain in my cheek and in my chest.
" Yes …she’s gone back. You, my dear brother, will chase her to the ends of the earth till she’s yours again.” He let go of my lapels and shoved me back on the ground.
“ I’m sorry, but I can’t watch you make a grave mistake. I don’t have a shoulder you can cry on.” He continued speaking, and I braced myself on my knees.
I was breathing heavily, contemplating what to do.“ The …..the baby might not be Nero’s.” I said.
His eyes widened.“ What?”
I finally lifted my gaze to him.“ Scarlett brought the results, and she’s as cunning as fuck. Raven told me that she never got to see the results herself.”
Alex gasped.“ And you believed Scarlett over her?”
I clenched my teeth. I fucked up there…I fucked up real bad.
Alex paced the room.“ You’re as dumb as shit!”
I didn’t have the strength to be annoyed right now. I don’t have the strength for anything.
“ You’re going back tomorrow, got it? I’m not kidding, Killian.” He stared at me, and I stared back.
My pulse quickened as I made my decision. I nodded slowly in response.
Alex breathed in relief.“ Good…first problem solved.”
I creased my brows as I stared at him. He took slow steps towards me, his eyes slightly narrowing in.
" What’s this I hear about Raven’s mum being murdered ?” He questioned, his gaze fixated on me.
I flashed him a grin. “How would I know ?’’