Yeah, why? If he wants to talk about the kiss, then this will be his opportunity to bring it up. I'm scared to bring it up myself. Scared from what? Scared to start having feelings for someone else? Scared I won't ever be enough for someone again? My phone buzzes and I take my time looking at his response. Just don't want things to be weird between us. I don't want that either. His message is still a little ambiguous, but I have a strong feeling he's talking about the kiss. Maybe we don't have to talk about it right away. Maybe we can wait to see how things play out. Putting the conversation on hold might be better for us. We're okay. I promise. I wonder if he regrets kissing me. I mean, he was the one to initiate it. Was he caught up in the moment and is worried he gave me the wrong idea? I apparently don't know Dylan well enough to really know his intentions and it's frustrating. Ethan and his friends must have caused mayhem for him, I assume, when he doesn't text me back. ~ The next few days go by in a blur. Dylan seems to be in his own world every time I see him, which isn't that often. In class, he appears occupied by something else in his mind. Once class is over, he walks me to journalism then disappears without a word. Jacob doesn't bother me. He doesn't even look at me in class. He seems angry and it shows on his face, but that's the only way I know he is. The good thing is he doesn't lash out and he keeps his distance. I wonder what's going on in his head too. Tuesday night, Dylan texts me and tells me he'll pick me up tomorrow. No ifs, ands, or buts. I can't help but wonder what he's up to. Tomorrow is my birthday after all. If him, Casey, and maybe even the guys have something planned, they've done a good job at hiding it. Part of me hopes they don't have anything planned so I can spend my birthday with my aunt. The next morning morning, after my grandparents call to say happy birthday, Casey facetimes me to see what I'm going to wear on what she calls 'the best day ever.' Every outfit I pull out, she dismisses. "I'm losing hope and time here," I say, sifting through my closet. She gasps suddenly. "Remember that red skirt you bought and still haven't worn?" I know exactly what skirt she's talking about. I haven't worn it yet because it's a little shorter than I like and I never returned it. "Yes," I say hesitantly. "Wear that, and your solid black shirt. You still have those black boots I left at your house, right? The leather ones that go up past the ankle? BOOM. Outfit right there." The look she's going for is a little edgier than I usually go when it comes to clothes. "I don't know, Case..." "Please, just do this for yourself. Remember our talk at the beginning of the year? Confident Lacey is in there somewhere and she's ready to come out again," she says. When I don't say anything, she sighs. "I know today is a little glum, and I can only try to understand the pain. It's my job as your best friend to make sure you're always going to be okay. And today you will be okay. You're going to put on that outfit, and you're going to make today your bitch because you're eighteen!" She's right. It absolutely sucks that my parents aren't here to celebrate with me, but they wouldn't want me to mope the whole day. I know, wherever they were, they're watching me and celebrating. I walk over to my drawer and pull out the skirt and yank my black shirt from the closet. "Okay. Outfit picked." Casey's smile practically takes up my entire phone screen. "Great! And if you're feeling really badass I have my leather jacket you can borrow." The leather jacket will undoubtedly boost my confidence, as it usually does when I wear it, so I nod. "Perfect." I tell her I'll see her at school and hang up. While getting ready, I feel the pain slowly easing away. It won't ever go away, but for a moment I feel undeniably happy. A badass, confident ensemble deserves some winged eyeliner and once I finish it, I look myself over in the mirror. Even if it is just for the day, gone is the girl who has been broken by Jacob's unfaithfulness. It's my birthday and no one is going to ruin it. Dylan texts me saying he's on his way to pick me up, making my heart pound a little faster in my chest. I saunter into the kitchen, where my aunt is slightly dancing at the stove. When she sees me, her jaw drops. For a second I think she's going to tell me to get back in my room and change, but she grins instead. "You definitely got my sense of style." She walks up to me and grabs my hand. "But you look so much like your mom." It makes me tear up. "Don't cry. I don't want you to ruin your makeup. I just want to say happy birthday, and you look amazing." "Thank you," I says, trying not to get choked up. "Your parents are watching you grow into a beautiful young woman, you know. I know they aren't missing a single beat of your life," she smiles and I can see her eyes watering. She blinks them away and takes a deep breath. "I made chocolate chip pancakes for you. I remembered you really liked them when you used to stay with me when you were younger." "The perfect birthday breakfast," I say, leaning against the cabinets. "Dylan is on his way to pick me up." "I'll make a couple more for him too." I can see her smirk as she flips a pancake. "He really is a gentleman." He's more than he likes to admit, probably. I just nod. "Are you two going out tonight?" "Not if you have anything planned," I tell her. I don't want to ditch her for my friends if she is planning some birthday dinner. "I'm ashamed to say I don't," she says, turning to look at me. "But I hope my present will make up for that." She walks out of the kitchen and disappear into her room. I flip the pancakes she left before she waltzes back into the kitchen. "Here," she holds out a small gift bag as I put the pancakes on a plate.