Chapter 29
“Are you sure it’s okay?” Kobie looked back down the lane when they got out of the truck.
“You heard Jake, he said to get out of his face.” Blair shrugged.
She bit her lip. “He sounded more like himself.”
He walked around to the front of the truck and held out his hand. “He was much more polite once you came in.”
She placed her hand in his and smiled at him. “Do you think Shaelan will figure out what it was?”
“She was on some video call with a few doctors or science people when I was checking in with Calum. I didn’t understand a thing any of them were saying, but my guess is she’ll know by morning.”
Blair stopped and looked down at her. “Let’s just take some time and pretend we have nothing else to worry about, okay?”
“Okay.” She smiled at him, “it’s going to be dark soon, do you know the way in the dark?”
He knew she was teasing him. Both of them could see just as well in the dark as they could in the light. “With my eyes closed.” He told her, holding his hand over his heart.
“We wouldn’t want to get lost.” She said with a smirk.
“Wouldn’t we?” He glanced around them. She laughed softly. “I have the best hunter and tracker with me. I’m confident she could find our way back.”
“The best?”
Blair nodded, “you beat Cal. I never could.”
“I don’t think that counts. He was more focused on finding the men on the property.”
“So were you, but you still did it.” She said nothing. “This is nice.” He motioned around them. “Out here, alone, the quiet—do you realize since the second we met we’ve been running or dealing with one crisis after the other?”
She nodded. “I could do with some boredom for a short while.”
Chuckling, he pulled on her hand so she was closer, and he could put his arm around her. They were almost at the cliff edge.
“It’s beautiful here.” She stopped and looked around. “Even in the low light, the last of the sun’s rays show us miles of nature.”
“I love living in this area.”
“I think I’m going to as well,” she sighed, “as soon as we resolve a few issues.”
“We’ll deal with it.” He pointed to the flat rocks. “They should be dry enough to sit on.”
When they sat down, he was content watching her look around. He tried to think of something, anything to say. He’d never had an issue finding words before, ever. Probably because this was important, more so than anything had ever been before.
“This is nice.” She grinned. “No noise, no bright lights. Thank you for thinking of it.”
He opened his mouth, then paused before he lied. “It was Cooper’s suggestion. I’ve been losing my mind trying to find five minutes to have you to myself...”
She put her hand over his mouth. “I don’t care who thought of it. Thank you.”
She sat there looking at him. He again couldn’t think of anything to say. As awkward went this was at the top of the scale. “What are you thinking?”
Kobie held his look for a moment, then looked away, “there’s so much I’m not sure how to separate it.”
“Pick one.” He observed her as she lifted her chin and looked at the sky. Beautiful.
“I’m worried about my brother,” she glanced at him for a second, “that if it ends up he can’t shift ever again...”
“Has the prognosis changed?”
She shook her head, “no, not that they’ve said, but...”
“Then don’t worry about it.” He reached over and brushed the hair off her shoulder so he could see her face. “There’s enough to worry about right now. I don’t think you need to look for more things.”
Amusement lit her face briefly, “that’s true.” She took a deep breath and blew it out in a steady, quiet way. “I’m not sure how I feel about the weapons training,” her eyes connected with his as she spoke. “I’m assuming guns, and I honestly don’t know if I could shoot someone.”
He didn’t want to dismiss her worry, but he knew there was something deeper bothering her. “I’m hoping you’re not in a position to need to, but,” he searched her face for a moment, “if it came down to you or them, I’d like to think you’d be able to at least incapacitate them.”
Her eyes widened, “again, that’s a good point. I guess we’ll have to see what’s involved.”
“I’m pretty sure our king and Cal had tracking in mind for you.” He shrugged, “we can ask for more details...”
“Do you it’s something that can be decided in advance?” She licked her lips in a nervous tell. “I feel like it may be something we plan out, but then have to adjust as we go.”
“Most likely. Are you having second thoughts about going?” As much as he had confidence in her ability to handle herself, he wouldn’t have been disappointed if she decided not to be involved.
She shook her head without hesitation. “No. I want to help. I heard Calum talking to Jay about how long this has been happening, of how many have they taken—Calum’s own mother?”
“I’m not sure if he could prove it, but yeah, there’s a lot of missing or dead loved ones because of Tomas...”
“Then I’m still in.” She gave her head a nod. “My mother is one of the missing.” She glanced down as she spoke. “I keep hoping I’ll find her someday.” She cleared her throat quietly. “Jay said we need to figure everything out before we go—for the sake of the clan.”
This may be the only opening he’d get. “For us as well. We can’t just keep talking about it without ever discussing it.” He smirked, “we’re going to be sharing the Alpha den,” he rolled his eyes at that description, “but we haven’t talked about what that involves since the day you told me you hadn’t decided.”
“I know you’re the right man to lead the clan.”
That wasn’t quite what he was looking for. “I appreciate you feel that way. I still have my doubts.” He watched as she looked everywhere but at him again, “for that to happen, my mate, from the Alpha family, has to actually be my mate.”
“I know.” She whispered.
She’d answered too quickly as if she was annoyed with the whole thing. “What’s the problem, Kobie. You said you hadn’t decided. I accepted that, but earlier you’re talking about our shared room, so there’s another issue you need to share.”
“It’s just,” she turned to look at him, her eyes searching his face, looking for something, “it’s probably stupid.”
“If it’s bothering you, I don’t think it’s stupid. It means it’s something we need to address.”
Kobie inhaled slowly, “okay.”
Blair sat there, allowing her the time to gather her thoughts and say them. A pained look went through her eyes. He placed a finger under her chin. “Just say it.”
“Okay, when we spoke about Kelsey and Layna,” she held up her hand when he went to speak, “I don’t blame you for spending time with Layna. I get that, I do. I mean, I’m not a virgin or...”
He put his thumb over her lips. “Maybe don’t say things like that. I understand needs, but my cat is barely holding on where you’re concerned and I’d rather not have to go kill someone.”
She nodded. “Sorry. Okay, you said you loved Kelsey. I didn’t understand how recently you were talking about until I spoke with Jake,” she shrugged, “we barely know each other...”
Blair would be having a discussion with Jake, later. He touched her mouth again, so she’d stop. She was getting more upset by saying it. “What I feel for you is not what I felt for her. I...”
“Blair, I know most women want pretty words and all the right words—I just want the truth. What you feel. I’m not like other women.”
He smirked, “I know you’re not, and I’m glad you aren’t.”
Now she sat there giving him that look, one that was ‘well I’m waiting, impress me,’ or close to it. He nodded slowly, “I think what you’re afraid of is—if I could love Kelsey one week and then—want you more than my next breath, that I’ll change my mind again.”
“Something like that.” She heaved a deep sigh.
What was he missing?
“I don’t want just that.” She glanced down at her hands. “That we’re just mates.”
Blair wanted to grin but suppressed it. “You don’t want the pretty words, but you want more than our animals being mated?”
“I told you it was stupid. I feel like a confused child.”
“No, it’s not stupid. I have my own worries about this.”
“You do?”
He scoffed softly, “yeah.”
“Like what?”
Clasping his hands, he rubbed them together while he thought of how to say it. “I keep hearing I’m supposed to be an Alpha, a leader, but I don’t know the first thing about any of that. I’m not a leader. I’ve followed instructions my whole life...”
“But you are.” She smirked, “while the rest of us are shocked or bumbling around trying to figure out what next, you’re already doing it or telling others what to do,” she held up her hand, “and not in a bad way.” She gave him a soft look, “all of the women are obsessed with you if you didn’t know.” The humor left her face, “they probably think I’m crazy for not already being mated to you.”
“I don’t care what others think. Okay, I do, but not in the same way it matters to me what you think. I don’t want to let you down. I don’t want to fail you.”
“You’ve already treated me with more respect and consideration than anyone in my whole life. I don’t care if something doesn’t go as planned, just as long as you treat me with respect and don’t push me aside just because I’m a woman.”
“I would never do that. To any women, most definitely never to you.”
“And that’s one reason you are the leader this clan needs.”
“You seem to be doing a better job of assuring me than I am you...”
“I just need to know this is more, Blair, more than our cats found their happily ever after.”
He grinned at that expression. “You haven’t heard long-time mates with each other—this ain’t no fairy tale.”
“You know what I mean.”
He nodded his head several times while trying to figure out how to explain it to her. “I didn’t know we were mates, you made sure of that, but still I was bordering on being obsessed with you. How fast you were, how agile, your tracking and directions are crazy good, how you looked out for everyone else before yourself,” he held her gaze, “I won’t give you the usual flattery and go on and on about how fucking gorgeous you are but know that I see that too.” He slipped off the rock and got on his knees in front of her, touching her cheek, so she’d continue to look at him, “I know you don’t want to be mated just because your cat tells you to, hell if that was all it took we would have marked each other long before we reached here, all I’m asking is give me a chance, give us a chance.” He watched her lick her lips and momentarily forgot what he was going to say, “no more of this kissing me quickly and walking away to avoid me for the rest of the day. Never mind your cat,” he cringed, “I know she can hear me, but never mind the nudges and prompting you to seek me out. Go with what you feel, what you want.” He brushed his thumb over her cheek, “we can talk about your concerns or worries as much as you want, any time you want, just please, give this a chance, Kobie, let me in, just a little. I promise you will not regret it.” He searched her eyes as she looked at him. He had no idea what she was thinking.
“I know you meant every word, but you’re so damn charming. I feel like I’ve just been blindsided.”
His lips quirked as he suppressed a grin. “I’m not trying to charm you, babe, I’m laying it out here just asking for a chance to be your everything, anything you need.”
She held her breath for a second, blinked, and looked at him differently. “Coming from your lips, that’s not even a line, is it?”
He shook his head slowly.
“Okay. I’ll stop running the other way every time I think about it.” She reached up and placed her hand over his against her cheek. “It’s just a lot, Blair, really. I never thought I’d ever have a mate, so I have to rethink everything I ever thought.”
“You don’t have to change who you are to be my mate. That’s not how it works.” He frowned,
“or that’s not how it’s going to work with me. I honestly have no idea how it works with other mated couples.” He blew out a breath. “I know there will be times you want to beat me, but I will always listen to you.”
“Are other Alpha couples like that?”
“From what I’ve seen, Beth may agree with Ed in front of people, but she puts all her cards on the table as soon as they’re out of sight.”
“I can see her doing that.”
He leaned back from her and lowered their hands, keeping hers enclosed in his own. “Is that why you’re having trouble with this? Not that we’re mates, but that as soon as we’re mated, we’re in charge of the clan?”
“Some of it. Aren’t you?”
“Honestly, I have no idea what I’m doing with suddenly being an Alpha. I know that when I have your input and know you’re with me, it’s easier.”
She grinned, “you have all the pretty right words without even trying.”
“It’s how I feel...”
“I know. I just needed to point that out.” She grasped his other hand and sat there studying him. “I suppose,” she lifted her shoulders and let them drop, “it wouldn’t be a real hardship being your mate.”
Blair grinned, “yeah, not too hard to look at?”
She shook her head, with a slight smirk, “you’re charming, sweet…”
“Sweet?”
Kobie grinned, “you know you are. The way you handle Daisie,” she glanced down at their hands, “it’s touching.”
“Mmm,” Blair leaned forward so their faces were closer, “there might be a few other perks too.”
Her eyes locked on his, a heated look was now in them. “You think so?” She whispered.
“I do.” Turning his head, he brushed his lips over hers lightly. Once, twice. He caught the slight hitch in her breath and reached up to put his hand behind her head as he kissed her completely. When she responded and opened her mouth to his exploration, he grasped her by the waist and stood with her long enough to sit down and have her straddle him. He broke the kiss, “I think about kissing you a thousand times a day.” He crushed her mouth with his own, needing her taste to fill his whole body.
Kobie held his head tight and slid forward so their bodies were fit together.
Blair growled in the back of his throat and grasped a handful of her hair. Tearing his mouth from hers, he gently leaned her back and nipped along her jaw with his teeth. “Your taste sets my insides on fire.” Biting her throat, he licked it after. “Your scent calms me but energizes me at the same time.” Softly, he bit her again, then sucked the skin into his mouth. “I could spend a day just tasting every inch of you.” He tugged the shoulder of her shirt down so he could nip her shoulder.
Grasping his hair not so gently, she jerked his head back up so she could bite his jaw. “I feel the same way.” She lowered her mouth to his neck and dragged her teeth over his skin. “I’ve never felt like this before, not even during my cycle.”
Blair growled a deep guttural sound and clutched her hips, rocking her into his painfully hard erection. Her mouth continued to move over his throat and his cat went crazy inside him, feeling her teeth that close to where she’d eventually claim him as her own. “You’re killing me.” He hissed out but made no move to stop her. He heard his shirt rip as she exposed more skin. Sharp teeth bit into his shoulder and he threw his head back, rejoicing in the pain. His mate was a little hellcat.
Without warning, a deluge of water hit him in the face. Kobie gasped and lifted her mouth from his. The storm had returned. He’d been so lost in her he hadn’t even sensed it.
Panting to catch her breath, she snuggled her face into his chest. “I didn’t even know it was going to rain.”
Blair held her against him and looked up. “It’s moving fast and going to get worse.” He blew out a breath and then wiped the water from his eyes. “As much as I don’t want to, we need to get back.”
Kobie nodded, “yeah, after the last storm, I’m worried…”
He stood up, holding her tight. “They’re nearby and will take advantage of the storm again.”
She nodded and slowly slid down him. When she stood in front of him, she looked up at him and gave a little shiver. “That’s a new kind of cold shower.”
Blair bared his teeth at her. “We’re not discussing how even nature is tossing up roadblocks lately.”
Kobie grinned and tried to fix his shirt. “I wrecked your shirt.”
“Thirty more seconds and you would have wrecked my control too.” Wrapping his arm around her, he pulled her along as they hurried back to the truck.
“Avoiding you seems like the safer option now.”
Blair stopped abruptly and looked down at her. “Don’t even…”
Kobie smiled, “I was kidding.”
“Killing me.” He mumbled and then grabbed her hand and jogged along the path.