Chapter 194 I love you
Chapter 194 I love you
Elara's POV,
I wake to an empty bed.
For one blissfully ignorant second, I simply smile into the pillow.
He’s probably downstairs already.
Lucien always wakes before me.
Always.
The sheets beside me are still warm enough to tell me he hadn’t been gone for long, and somehow that tiny detail comforts me. I bury my face into the place he’d slept, breathing in the faint scent of cedarwood and whiskey before forcing myself to sit up.
“...Shit.”
Sunlight. Far too much sunlight.
I throw the blanket off me.
“We’re late.”
My heart jumps into my throat as I stumble toward the wardrobe, nearly tripping over my own dress from last night. We were supposed to leave this morning. The operation. Matteo.
God.
How could I sleep through—
I freeze when I feel my left hand, and find that it’s...empty. I stare at my finger.
No ring.
My breathing catches.
“...No.”
Immediately I drop to my knees beside the bed, searching beneath it.
Nothing.
I check the bedside table.
Nothing.
The bathroom.
Nothing.
Then I remember the field.
“Yeah, I left it there.” I press my palms over my face. “Elara, you absolute idiot.”
Of course, it must have slipped off while we danced. The only thing I have left… The only thing that was truly ours.
I swallow the panic down.
We'll find it later.
Lucien will help me.
He always does.
Quickly, I throw on the first clothes I find, barely bothering to button my shirt correctly before rushing toward the bedroom door.
“I’m coming!”
I grab the handle, but my fingers...
Pass through it.
I stop.
Blink.
Then laugh nervously.
“...What?”
I reach again, slower this time, and my hand slips clean through the brass handle as though it were made of smoke.
Every muscle in my body locks.
“No…”
My breathing quickens.
“No.”
I back away and shake my head.
“No.”
The door isn’t real.
My pulse explodes.
‘No.”
I rush forward and slam both hands against it. Except… There is no impact. My palms slide through polished wood that doesn’t exist. The hallway beyond flickers for the briefest second before stabilizing again.
Cold realization settles into my bones.
The breeze.
I can feel it. I can hear birds outside. I can smell the morning. But there are no windows. There never were.
“...Lucien.”
The whisper comes out broken.
“No.”
I whirl around.
Every wall, every corner, every piece of furniture. I slam into them one after another, searching desperately for something—
Anything real.
Nothing is, except my bed.
Every direction bends back into itself. Every corridor becomes another corridor. Every door becomes another wall.
My chest tightens until I can’t breathe.
He...
He...
“No.” My voice cracks. “He promised.”
He promised that night on the roof. After I’d nearly stepped into empty air believing the ground itself was another illusion.
He’d held my face, kissed my forehead, and sworn—
“I’ll never use it on you again.”
“LUCIEN!”
My scream tears through the room.
“I hate you!”
I grab the nearest vase and hurl it toward the wall. It bounces off, the wall ripples, then becomes solid again.
Another.
Another.
Another.
Books.
Lamps.
Picture frames.
Everything.
Nothing breaks, because nothing is real.
“LET ME OUT!”
I run toward where I know the bedroom wall should end. Instead, I find another hallway.
“No!”
The illusion folds over itself endlessly. Like a maze designed by someone who knows exactly how I think.
Because he does. He built it. He built it for me.
“You promised!” I pound both fists against the fake wall until my knuckles split. “You promised me!”
Nothing.
Only the sound of my own breathing. I slam my shoulder into it.
Again.
Again.
Again.
Pain shoots through my arm, but the wall doesn’t move. It isn’t even there. I slide down it anyway.
My tears blur everything.
“You said…” My voice dissolves into sobs. “You said you wouldn’t do this again…”
I hit my forehead against the wall, hard enough for stars to burst behind my eyes.
“I’ll kill myself!”
Another hit.
“Do you hear me?!”
Another.
“I’ll do it!”
Another.
“I swear to God I’ll do it!”
The words echo around the illusion, but no answer comes. Only silence so complete it makes me wonder if he’s already gone.
No, he can’t be.
He wouldn’t.
He...
He knew. He knew this was our last night together.
He knew.
And instead of letting me have one final morning, one final goodbye, he stole even that from me.
I crawl toward the place where the door should be and collapse against it, clutching at empty air with shaking fingers.
“Lucien…” My voice is barely audible now. “...please.” I press my forehead against the illusion. “I don’t want this to be our last time.”
Fresh tears spill down my face.
“We were supposed to have one last hurrah.”
One last argument. One last laugh. One last breakfast. One last kiss before betraying each other.
Instead...
He left while I was asleep.
Like a coward. Like a man who knew if he looked me in the eye one more time, he wouldn’t have been able to leave.
I draw one ragged breath before every bit of restraint inside me finally shatters.
“LUCIEN!!”
The scream rips through the illusion until my throat burns raw.
“I HATE YOU!”
Silence.
“I HATE YOU!”
Silence.
My body folds in on itself.
“I…”
A sob steals the rest of the sentence.
“...I love you.”