41 - Library

**Drakar**

The fingers of one hand drummed against the polished wood of the dining table, the sound of each tap loud within the oppressive silence. Before me, the maid actually trembled, her words barely above a whisper.

I had instructed her to call Lysandra for dinner, but she came without her, claiming Lysandra said in her words, ‘He can shove a fork into his ass. He's not my master. So let me be!’

"She refuses to come eat, Master." Her head bowed so low it was almost touching the floor, her hands clutching her apron as if it might shield her from his displeasure.

I narrowed my eyes, irritation flaring. "Where is she?"

"The library, Master."

My chair scraped harshly against the floor as I pushed it back, rising to my feet.

I offered no further comment. The suffocating pressure in the room dissipated with my departure, though for me, it increased with each stride.

The heavy brass handle of the library door felt cool under my hand as I paused, taking a deep breath. Control was vital.

Pushing the door open, I stepped inside—and froze.

Lysandra stood on a ladder, precariously perched near the top, her tongue poking out slightly in concentration as her fingers traced along the spines of ancient tomes. Her murmurs were soft but sharp with frustration as she pulled one book after another, examined it, and then slid it back into place.

A strange, unwelcome warmth stirred in my chest. She didn't belong here- neither in my library nor in my life- and yet, there she was, a spark of defiance and light cutting through the shadows that defined me.

Then her thoughts slipped into my mind, faint and unbidden.

Why does he always push me away?

My jaw tightened. The curse had made this all too frequent: her unguarded musings seeping into my consciousness.

One minute, he's almost human. Almost warm. And then, he's cold again, like I don't matter. Like I'm some… annoying bug that won't go away. 

And to think that I want to go, but he won't let me. Or… will I actually go if he let me?

Her words, though unspoken, still cut deep, and weighed more than I liked to acknowledge. My fists clenched at my sides, the shame coiling in my chest.

She let out a louder-than-usual sign. If he won't tell me anything, I'll figure it out myself.

I spoke before I thought, my voice cutting through the quiet. "What are you doing?

Her startled yelp filled the room. The book she’d just taken nearly slipped from her hands as she whirled around, her wide eyes locking onto mine.

“Don’t sneak up on me like that!” she snapped, one hand pressed to her chest.

I raised an eyebrow, allowing a faint smirk to curve my lips. “You’re in my library, Lysandra. If anyone is out of place, it’s you.”

She huffed and set the book down loudly. "Excuse me for trying to learn something. Not like you've been forthcoming with answers."

I stepped closer and with each deliberate step the space between us shrank. "And what exactly are you trying to learn?"

"Anything," she said, crossing her arms over, her chin jutting out in defiance. "About you. About this place. About why I'm even here.

My gaze gentled but my voice remained firm. "Some knowledge is dangerous."

"And some ignorance is deadly," she returned. 

She didn't flinch, her bright glare stabbed into mine. "You keep me in the dark and wonder why I'm frustrated?

Her words hung in the air, like a challenge. For a very long moment, I said nothing, just watched her. Then, wordlessly, I turned and started tugging books from the shelves.

"What are you doing?" she asked suspiciously.

"Helping."

She blinked, thrown momentarily. "Helping?"

"You wanted answers." I set a small stack of books on the table nearby. "Start here."

Hesitation flickered across her face, but curiosity won out. She stepped closer, her fingers brushing the cover of the top book.

"The Origins of the Dragon Lords," she read aloud. Her brow furrowed as she glanced up at me. "This doesn't exactly scream 'For Beginners.'"

A genuine smile tugged at my lips, rare and fleeting. "Knowledge has its price."

She rolled her eyes but couldn't hide the small smile that crept onto her face. "Fine. But don't think this gets you off the hook. You still owe me explanations."

I inclined my head slightly, neither agreeing nor denying. As she settled into a chair with one of the books, I leaned casually against the edge of the table, watching her.

And that was it; the tension that had built between us seemed to dissipate, leaving a truce in its place.

She glanced up then and met my stare. "What are you staring at?" she said in a light voice, while the faintest blush showed upon her cheeks.

"Just making sure you don't damage the books," I replied coolly.

She snorted. "Please, I'm not some barbarian."

"That remains to be seen.-

The venom had not been real in her glare, and for one second, the corners of her mouth turned upward. She swiftly buried her face back in the book, but the flicker of amusement lingered in the air.

I watched her, and again her unspoken thoughts weighed against my mind. I wanted to speak, to explain, but the truth was a double-edged sword. It could protect her-or destroy her.

"Lysandra," I started low.

She looked up, her gaze questioning. "What?"

The words tangled in my throat, my fears twisting them into silence. Finally, I turned away.

"Stay out of trouble," I said over my shoulder, my tone gruff as I walked toward the door.

"Seriously?" she called after me, frustration clear in her voice. "That's it?"

I didn't answer. I turned around and closed the door behind me, leaning against the frame to shut my eyes. Her thoughts still lingered in my mind.

If he won't tell me anything, I'll figure it out myself.

A faint, bittersweet smile pulled at my lips and vanished.

"Good luck with that," I murmured, turning into a shadow in the corridor.

I retreated into the darkness, my mind still reeling from the encounter. Lysandra's determination was cute to see, but also troubling. She had no idea what she was getting herself into.

I could feel her frustration as I walked away-the frustration of wanting to expose the secrets that I locked away. I knew that it was only a matter of time before she'd stumble upon something with which she wasn't ready to deal.

I retreated to my chambers, my thoughts filled with the weight of my duties.

Well inside my chamber, a soft tap at the door drew me out of my musings. "Enter," I called out.