Chapter 41

**Jacky's POV**

Night had fallen, the dorms were filled with chatter and laughter. Most over the girls sat on the bed, gossiping and discussing the fantasies of what Alpha Roman would be like in bed. If he wasn't my mate, perhaps I'd understand them. However, my mate bond enslaves my to him. It slows down my plans to one day kill him for killing my sister, it makes me weak and thirsty for his touch.

My heart felt heavy as I stood by the window, watching shadows stretch across the deserted streets.

"Jacky, you can't spend the night sulking here," Valerie said, storming into the room without warning.

I didn't bother turning to her, my gaze fixed outside. "I'm not sulking. I'm resting."

She scoffed. "Resting? You've been staring out of that window for the last hour like it's about to reveal the meaning of life."

I let out a long sigh, leaning my forehead against the cold glass. "Val, I don't feel like going to the festival. You know how it is. People are on edge. The Alpha made it clear he doesn't want anyone attending."

I knew what the Alpha's play was. The rules were simple, any participant of the trials, once joined, would only live when dead or as a winner. It was part of the contract we signed. It was more about ensuring the secrets were learnt about the Alpha and the palace remained just that, secrets. It was also about the Alpha's safety. Anyone looking for a window of opporturnity to come for him would have to use the mate trials, they're the only reason Roman would leave the palace unprotected. Valerie plopped herself onto the bed, arms crossed defiantly. "And since when do you care about what the Alpha wants? You're Jacky. The same Jacky who despises Alpha Roman for not recognizing your mate bond. The same Jacky who-"

"Enough with the pep talk," I interrupted, my voice sharper than I intended. "It's not the same."

"Why not?" she pressed. "Because you're scared? Because you think some edict from the Alpha will stop you from living your life? Or is it something else?"

Her words cut deeper than I wanted to admit. She was right, and I hated her for it. "I just don't feel like celebrating, okay? Does that satisfy you?"

"No, it doesn't," Valerie shot back, standing up and pointing a finger at me. "You've been dragging yourself around like a ghost for weeks. I'm sick of watching you drown in your own misery. And let's not pretend you're not secretly hoping to run into him again, the man who has just as much a hold on you as your clueless mate does."

Her accusation made my chest tighten. "What are you talking about?"

Her smirk was infuriating. "Oh, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Your mysterious one-night stand? The man you still think about every time you stare off into space? Don't even try to deny it."

My cheeks burned, but I refused to let her win. "That's ridiculous."

"Is it?" Valerie challenged, crossing her arms. "Because if it were me, I'd be out there looking for him instead of moping around here like some tragic heroine."

My jaw clenched as I wrestled with the temptation to snap at her. She was insufferable, but she wasn't wrong. "Val, even if I wanted to go, how do you expect us to get there? The patrols are everywhere. We'll get caught."

A mischievous glint lit up her eyes. "Who said anything about the main roads? There's a way through the maze and under the fence. I checked earlier. No guards."

"You're insane," I muttered, shaking my head.

"Maybe," she admitted, her grin widening. "But you love me for it. Now come on, get dressed. We're doing this."

Her enthusiasm was relentless, and I found myself caving despite every logical argument screaming at me not to. Valerie had that effect-a storm that tore through any resistance.

She was resilient in everything she did. I reached to my pile of clothes, pulling out the mask. The same mask I'd wore the day I met my stranger. I hope that he'd somehow free me from the slavery of being Alpha Roman's mate.

The maze was darker than I remembered, the air thick with the scent of damp earth. Valerie led the way with a confidence that bordered on recklessness, her movements quick. I followed close behind, nerves prickling with every snap of a twig or rustle of leaves.

"You sure about this?" I whispered, glancing over my shoulder.

She crouched near a section of fence, lifting a loose panel at the bottom. "Positive. Now crawl through before I change my mind."

I hesitated, my pulse quickening. Then, with a deep breath, I dropped to my knees and slid under the fence, wincing as the cold metal scraped my skin. Valerie followed, brushing herself off with a triumphant grin.

"See? Piece of cake," she said, brushing dirt from her hands.

"Let's hope it's worth it," I muttered, straightening up as the sounds of the festival reached my ears.

The festival spilled into the streets, every corner bathed in the golden glow of lanterns. Music filled the air, mingling with laughter and the clink of glasses. Crowds moved like a restless tide, their masks and costumes adding a layer of mystery to the chaos.

Valerie practically dragged me into the throng, her energy contagious as she spun and twirled to the rhythm of the music. I couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm, despite the tight knot in my chest.

"You're impossible, you know that?" I said, shouting over the noise.

"And you're lucky to have me," she shot back, grabbing two drinks from a passing vendor. "Now drink up. Tonight's about letting go."

The alcohol burned going down, but it dulled the edges of my anxiety. Valerie and I danced, laughed, and moved through the crowd, the music carrying us like a wave. For the first time in months, I felt a sliver of freedom.

---

Hours passed before the weight of the night settled on my shoulders again. I pulled away from Valerie, needing a moment of quiet.

"I need air," I told her, trying to steady my voice.

She frowned, her playful demeanor softening. "Do you want me to come with you?"

I shook my head. "No, I'll be fine. I just need a minute."

The café stood in shadow at the edge of the street, its boarded-up windows a reminder of everything I'd lost. I hesitated at the door, my chest tight with a mix of longing and dread. Then, before I could talk myself out of it, I broke the lock and slipped inside.

The familiar scent of coffee and wood polish hit me like a wave, and the tears came before I could stop them. I sank to the floor, my shoulders shaking with sobs as memories flooded in-Anna's laughter, Eloise's determination, the quiet moments of hope I'd clung to in this space.

Valerie must have followed me, because a moment later, she was kneeling beside me, pulling me into a hug.

"Jacky," she said softly, "it's okay. You're allowed to break sometimes."

I shook my head, wiping my eyes. "I can't afford to break. Not now. Not ever."

"You're human," she insisted, her voice firm. "Not some unfeeling machine. And you've been carrying so much for so long. Let it out, Jacky."

Her words broke something inside me, and I let myself lean into her. "It's just... this place. It was all I had after Eloise left. Little Anna and I built a life here. We laughed here, cried here. It's all I have left of her."

Valerie's grip tightened. "You're not alone. You have me. And you have the right to take your time to heal."

I pulled away, my gaze falling on the counter. Rummaging through the drawers, I found it-the mask I'd worn the night of the masquerade. My fingers closed around it, the cool surface grounding me.

"Jacky?" Valerie asked, watching me curiously.

I held up the mask, a ghost of a smile tugging at my lips. "This. This is how he'll recognize me."

Her eyes lit up, mischief flickering in her expression. "Then you have to wear it tonight. Who knows? Maybe fate has something planned."

I wanted to argue, but instead, I chose to hope with her. Perhaps I'd meet him again. Perhaps I can hug him, kiss him, get the comfort I've craved the last month.

Back at the festival, I put on the mask as Valerie led me into the heart of the masquerade. The crowd pulsed around us, the air electric with laughter and music. I clutched the mask tightly, letting her pull me into a dance.

For the first time in months, I felt alive. And then I saw him.

Tall, imposing, his presence commanding attention even in a sea of masked faces. My breath caught, it was him. I recognized that golden mask anywhere. He had this aura that screamed power. Power that made me ache to submit. To go on my knees for him. He was every chance the man Roman wasn't. He seemed kind, gentle, and quite lovely. Even now, as I stare at his half covered face, I can't help but compare him to Roman.

They're like two sides of the same coin. He is everything I'd love to add into Alpha Roman. Shape him into the perfect mate. But he's wicked, and here, I've been blessed with a man who stares at me with the same infatuation I have for him.

Heavens be blessed.

"Jacky?" Valerie whispered, following my gaze.

I didn't answer. I couldn't.

Because in that moment, I knew he was the one I'd been waiting for.