Syndra- the lustrous serpent

Syndra- the lustrous serpent
I didn’t tell Hawke what Vale had said to me, and he didn’t ask.

Maybe he sensed it was too much, or maybe he had picked it up from my mind and I didn't know about it. Either way, the silence between us that night wasn’t awkward like I had expected. It was heavy, but it felt shared rather than isolating.

He stayed beside me until I drifted into sleep, his arm wrapped protectively around my waist. But sleep offered no escape.

I saw Vale’s red and gold eyes again, his words slithering into the back of my mind. If you want to be with them, you have to be with me. 

I felt the pressure of his presence in my dream, the unwanted desire he awakened, and the shame that followed it.

When I jolted awake, my breath was shallow and my skin was damp with sweat.

Hawke was sitting quietly in the chair, watching me closely.

“You’re safe, I’m here,” he said softly, rising and pulling me into his arms. 

I swallowed hard, unable to speak for a moment.

“You are like my shelter. Please, don't abandon me,” I begged, tightening my hands around him.

He held me even closer, his nose brushing through my hair as he whispered, “I’ll cling on to you even beyond death. Don’t ever think there’ll be a moment when I’ll abandon you.”

“Thank you,” I murmured, pulling away just to look into his mesmerizing blue eyes that I was obsessed with. I wondered if I had ever told him I love his eyes before.

“You are most welcome, my pet,” he said, brushing a loose strand of hair from my face. 

Right now, I couldn't even tell if he was replying to me or my thoughts. I hope he wasn't listening though, I didn't want him to know I had dreamed of Vale.

“Did you dream of him?” He said, and I gave him a sharp look before I turned away. 

“Yes,” I replied, exhaling softly.

He sat properly on the bed and drew me into his arms. He held me like I was something priceless he was terrified of losing, and that warmed my heart. Everyone I ever loved always leaves me. But he's an ancient vampire, he's not supposed to die before me. 

My back was pressed against his chest, his legs stretched out on either side of mine as he locked me in his cold, comforting embrace. One arm wrapped firmly around my waist, the other resting gently across my shoulders, his hand splayed protectively over my heart.

“Whatever he said to you, whatever he did, you’re not alone in this. I need you to know that.”  

I nodded, but the words Vale had spoken still echoed in my head. And even with Hawke here, I couldn’t shake the feeling that the serpent was awakened inside me.

Hawke.

I called his name in my mind to confirm if he was listening to my thoughts. 

He kissed the back of my head and his hand over my hand subtly fondled my breast.

The gentle squeeze sent a tingling current straight to my nipples. They hardened instantly beneath the hospital gown.

I bit back a needy moan. 

Are you listening to me?

Hawke nodded and his hand moved around me. He whispered, “Yes.” in my ears, his deep, hoarse voice sent a shiver down my spine.

I don't think I can resist him.

I said in my mind and the air around us stilled.

He remained quiet for a few minutes as if he were in deep thought. 

Oh. I wish I could read his thoughts. 

“Just stay away from him, please.” He finally said, a terrible dread thick in his tone.

I knew I should be terrified too but I wasn’t.

I was confused. Angry. And worst of all… I was incredibly drawn to the very monster he warned me against. 

The way my body reacted to Vale’s was like a magnet. When he was here, I was utterly pulled to him, helpless, as if every cell in me wanted to be one with him. 

The attraction was instinctual —Like the serpent in my blood knew him, worshiped him.

“I don't want him to fuck or bite me,” I said quietly, unsure whether I was trying to convince Hawke or myself. “But there’s something wrong with me. There's a lustrous serpent inside me. I think it’s awakened. It’s like I’m… wired to submit to him, to let him dominate me, and feed on my blood.”

Hawke’s grip tightened around me, his jaw flexing against the top of my head.

“You’re not wired to him,” he said, his voice sharper than usual. “You’re fighting off centuries of blood magic and trauma. Syndra might be able to control your body but not your mind. I believe you can resist him if you want to. None of this is stronger than your will. Once you decide not to let him anywhere near you, your brain will instinctively start avoiding him.”

I wasn't paying attention to his words after I heard him say the serpent's name correctly. 

I heard the name of the serpent once from the Vicar when I told him about my dark, extreme gangbang fantasies, but I had totally forgotten. 

I could feel my pulse thudding louder in my ears as I whispered. “You know about the serpent?” I turned my head to look up at him. “How come you never speak about it?”

Hawke met my eyes, hesitation flickering in his piercing gaze for just a second before he started to explain to me. “I did my research when I didn't burn from the inside like I was supposed to after drinking your blood for the first time. I recently found some books about it. I can bring them for you if you want,” 

I frowned. Then I remember that no one knew anything about Syndra in the Order except its name since my grandfather, who was their founder, had it too. 

So how did he get books about it? 

“You can get books about anything in this world with the right connection,” he said, prying on my thoughts again. 

I turned and settled my back into his big, muscular chest. It was best not to call out his mind-invading habit in this intimate moment.

“Tell me more about Syndra. Is it a she or a he?” 

“What’s inside your blood is a pest. It produces poisonous sexual energy that could kill any vampire after the first taste, except the Zenith.”

“But you are not a Zenith, are you?” I asked, turning to meet his gaze again. 

His eyes darkened, his jaw tight. “Unfortunately, Vale is the only Zenith alive.”

“Then why aren’t you dead? And don’t give me that ‘fated mate’ nonsense. I’m not buying it.”

“No idea. Vale believes it’s got something to do with him being my maker,” Hawke said, irritation creeping into his voice.

“He thinks it’s the blood bond? That somehow you’re tethered to him? Would that mean everyone he creates could survive the toxins too?”

“I haven't figured it out yet. I’ve outgrown whatever bloodbound he thought he still had with me. All I just want from you is to recall your memories. Before that, I should have gotten back the Vespera dagger from Mia and her cohorts.”

The Vespera dagger? How—

I stared at him, shocked. “How did you know where the Vespera is? Who’s Mia, and how the hell did she end up with the sacred dagger?”

He gazed right back at me, sighed hard. “Need you to get your memories back. ASAP. Maybe we should fuck more. It helped you remember the hot quickie, didn’t it?”
His voice dropped lower, and his hand grabbed my thighs as he lifted me to pose on him. 
“If fucking you hard triggers your memories and bring it to the surface, then I volunteer to give you as many orgasms you need until every last one comes back. No breaks. No safeword. Just you, getting pounded like the sweet whore you're while the past rips through you.”