Chapter 38 Chapter 38
ALINA'S POV
"You're one nasty little bitch, aren't you?"
"I-I-
"You're so nasty!" He chuckled, deep. Dark. Lips on my neck. "Checking me in secret, aren't you? Sneaky. Think you're smooth, hmm?"
"N-no," I shivered in response, gripping his arm. My nails sinking in. Pussy clenched as his tongue traced up to the outline of my earlobe. "No. No, I'm sneakyyy. Roman."
"Sir," he bit down.
"S-s-sir," I gasped out, shocked. My pulse racing, eyes wide, teeth biting down hard on my lip. Unable to do nothing else as his hand dug into my waist, twisting the fabric of my bikini bottoms. My legs spread parted, raised, positioned so my knees balled up against my chest. His other hand positioned behind me, trapping me.
"Alina..." his voice trailed to my ears, breath hot on my neck. Burning hot. So hot I shivered in my position, going crazy out of my mind. My ass burning up. The bonnet of his bloody red car right underneath me, burning through my ass there. The skin.
But all that burning, all that physical and yet psychological burning, none of it could be compared to the absolute inflamed gorge that was my pussy!
The damned organ between my thighs that seemed to have a mind of it's own and right now controlling every part of me. "Oh my God," I whimpered as he touched my skin. Getting underneath my bikini bottoms and heading for my burning ass. "Ohhhh..."
"You're a slut," he whispered, smiling against my neck. "You're a big slut. A very big nasty ass slut!"
"I am," I breathed in agreement. Vision glazed. Wanting more than anything to be touched. "I'm a slut, sir. Am you're slut... yours."
"Oh really?"
"Yes please. Yes," I was going crazy. Losing every bit of reasoning, unable to take much more. Anymore and I would die in this slow cooking he was putting me in!
So I took matters into my own hands. "Roman," I nibbled his jaw, breathing hard. Grabbed his hand reaching for my ass, using it to further pull on my bikini bottoms, my knees raising even more, the bikini strap getting slapped right into my soaking pussy! Moans immediately leaving my lips. "Oh fuck!"
I grabbed his other hand behind me then, eager. Leading it straight for my center.
His fingers, forcing them to touch me. Rubbing my leaking juices all over his fingers, my lips parted in hard pants, pushing him in despite my bikini bottoms. "Such a slut," His dark chuckles vibrated all around me. My skin. But I didn't care. I didn't care one bit.
"Please..." I breathed instead, rubbing his fingers against my pussy. Forcing that friction. "Please fuck me. Please fuck me right now, Roman. Fuck me your bloody red car!"
So shameless.
"Is that what you really want?" He teased, spreading my knees apart even more. Pulling me down the bonnet, to meet his waist.
"Roman..."
"This is what you really want? What you want you fucking slut??"
"Yes," I gripped him, holding the stare of those green eyes. "I want it. Fuck me. Fuck me right now, Roman."
"Fuck me!!" He dug into me then. Ripple of gasps letting out of my lips, the shock waves hitting me all over! Forcing my eyes flew open right then and there, water splashing all over me!
I froze with a start. My mind wide awake, eyes wide too taking in everything around me. My environment. Where I was, what was happening, and finally...
What just happened.
"You're a slut. You're a big slut. A very big nasty ass slut!"
"I am. I'm a slut, sir. Am you're slut... yours." The memory replayed. Understanding dawning on me. Shame. Disgrace. Disgust. All of it!
"Oh my God!" I sat mortified, replaying it all.
"Please fuck me. Please fuck me right now, Roman. Fuck me your bloody red car!"
"You're checking me out in secret, aren't you? Sneaky."
"I want it. Fuck me."
"This is what you really want? What you want you fucking slut??"
"Yes! I want it. Fuck me. Fuck me right now!"
"Fuck me!!!"
"Oh my God!!" I screamed out, clenching my hair. Crazed out of my mind. Of my own thoughts, memories, Dreams!
This was a dream. Again.
Again!!
What the hell was this? Some sick sex deprived joke of the century?!
This is a clear sign of reality bleeding into subconscious! My subconscious!
A red car? Bikini bottoms? Him?
Those were three striking factors that were in my daily reality! I saw them physically with my own eyes, and now I was seeing them in my subconscious. My dreams. And in ways that I didn't even see them physically in the first place!
What sort of fucked up brain do you have, Alina?!
"Shameless. So fucking shameless!" I lamented silently, embarrassed beyond measure. Moving to get out of bed like I usually do when this happens, get out of my shorts too, knowing they were damped.
But guess what?
I couldn't.
I couldn't get out of bed. Why?
Cause I wasn't on the bed. I wasn't anywhere close to the bed. I was in the bloody jacuzzi!
The same jacuzzi that I got in to wash off myself after rushing back from the pool. I came here to wash off, then fell asleep dreaming of nonsense!
"Oh fuck me," I stared around. Speechless. Disbelief at my own situation.
Still I pushed myself to get out. Out of the bath, it was long overdue. Who knows how long I'd been in there. Water dripping and poured everywhere as I did though, somewhat pissed at myself. Grabbing a towel, but then feeling a certain sleekness between my legs. My thighs.
An obvious result of my seemingly 'adventurous' mind. Cause how else do you explain this? How else??
"So useless, this bath." I spat, rubbing myself clean. My hair. "How do you even fall asleep in a bath? A very cold bath! How did I sleep off in there??"
As if on cue, a purple ball floated to the top of the bath. Coming up with that burp sound. One that makes you look at the water. And I did. Sighting the ball, then another set of memories coming back to me.
Reminding me. Reminding of what I had done.
"What?" I stared at myself. The ball. "Okay hold on, I slept off in the bath after jerking the fuck off? I got into the bath to jerk off and then REMAINED in the bath? Leading to all this?? The dream?!"
I turned to the mirror opposite. My reflection clear, but disgust creeping up on my skin. My face. My features.
"Arghh, I'm gonna be sick." I bent over, lamenting. "I'm gonna be so sick, what the fuck Alina?! What the actual fuck!"
This isn't working. Whatever this was, it wasn't working!
I needed help.
I needed help, I was going crazy.
"What is wrong with me? What is wrong?"
"Okay let me get this straight, you're saying, that you're dreaming?"
My closed my shut, not wanting to see her face while she said that. Or anything at all.
"You're saying that you're dreaming. Of sex. Of... SEX."
"Ughhhh, could you please already!" I groaned out, grabbing my drink now. "You already heard me say it, why keep on repeating it."
"Cause I want to understand it!" She bellowed, loud. Laughing out. "Oh my God. Oh my God!"
"C'mon Cleo... Stop it."
She only laughed some more, "I want to, but...oh my God! I cannot believe what I'm hearing. Virgin/ chaste/celibate Alina Monroe is craving sex! WOW."
"This isn't funny," I grumbled, looking around for a bit. Conscious of our environment. Someone might hear her.
Currently we were having lunch. Lunch at a seemingly fancy place, not where we would normally go to, or used to go to.
"We have new paychecks, we should behave like it." Cleo had insisted, choosing a fancy restaurant that made things easy for us to get to from our different workplaces.
So by 12: 30 I left Oxygen, about 20 mins later, and here I was getting beaten down while I was low by an incredibly dressed up Cleo.
White blazer, I don't give a fuck about your mama white short dress, paired with some unforgiving bloody red heels. Red lips, gold accessories and some fresh curls to her black hair.
A real paycheck upgrade kind of dressing. You just know she was the talk of the entire Boldlines building.
"Okay let's be real," she cleared her throat, finally getting serious. "What exactly do you say happened? How long has this been happening and how often?"
I sighed at first, reluctant but none of that would help me.
Cleo was an expert when it came to things like this. All things exploring and reckless, that's Cleo. Not me. So if I needed help, she was my best shot.
"It's exactly as I said," I muttered, "I keep these dreams and... it's been happening for a while now. Maybe about 2 months now? I don't know. Wat before our presentation."
"Hmm," she kept quiet. Thinking. "And it's just random sex scenes... with you in it? Just you or someone you know? Me maybe?"
"You?? Oh please!"
"C'mon, I'm desirable! So fucking sexy, I can be in your dream. A little fetish fantasy or something... You might like it."
"Trust me, it was a dick. I've felt it multiple times to know it was a dick, not a vagina."
"Okay alright," she chuckled,
"So what you think?" I pressed, "Something wrong with me? Anything?"
"Wrong with you?" She scoffed, "the way I see you're working perfectly fine! Your body's working perfectly fine and damn you're healthy. Having wet dreams? There's nothing wrong with that, everyone gets those. It's just a way of your body letting you know that ... it's starved."
I dressed back. Sighing on my seat.
"Girl look," Cleo took my hands, "There's nothing wrong with you, nothing. You're just horny. Very horny. Now you're not paying attention to your body physically and that's why it's showing up as dreams. You're so fucking stressed out and shut from the world, your body. You're a 25 year old vibrant woman that should be getting some at least every week!"
"Every week? What am I? A dog?"
She laughed, "You might even do more than that when you find someone to fuck!"
"Cleo,"
"I'm serious. You need sex. You need to have sex, Alina. That's the solution. Get it out of your system, else you'll fall down one day cause of pure starvation."
I just rolled my eyes. But then I thought about it.
Having sex.
That seemed reasonable. Dream of sex? Then have sex.
"Do you even remember when last you got kissed?" She suddenly asked, pulling me from my thoughts. "When last did you have sex or get kissed, Lina?"
"Well, I-I-
"5 years ago? College? With your damned ex??" She stared at me, unimpressed. Completely and absolutely unimpressed. Even I felt uncomfortable by it all.
But she wasn't wrong though. After everything that happened, after...Roman.
I just locked up. I had too many problems right after that anyways, what time did I have to worry about having sex or getting kissed. The last time I did it, I ended
up with an unbelievable problem that almost cost me my life.
You couldn't exactly blame me.
"You know what?" Cleo picked up her phone, "That's it. You're having sex. I'm getting you sex."
"What are you doing?" I asked, staring at her phone. Bit she simply shrugged.
"I'm getting sex, hence signing you up on Oxygen."
What???
"You're going to fuck some Oxygen man!"