Chapter Thirty

My head hasn't stopped spinning since last week when I'd overheard Tori talking to Jude. I didn't want to assume anything, but with vague comments like that, swimming away with some kind of idea is easy. Had Tori cheated on Blake? Jude's crumbling away from the guilt, and it'll be a matter of days until he finally cracks and reveals Tori's darkest secret. I haven't decided if I want to be there for it, hiding feels like a great option as well. "What are you thinking about?" Kyle throws an apple slice at my face. The juicy fruit hits my cheek and falls onto the ground. He laughs and stretches out on the lush grass while chomping on another piece of food. "You're super gross." I pick the piece up and throw it back at him. The food slice misses his face by a long shot and lands on the ground. Blake has been in and out of school this week. My mother has stepped up and offered to take care of London for a day each week since she thinks she's adorable and wants to see Blake do well in school. I also think taking on the motherly role is helping her bare the load. London would never come close to replacing Logan, nobody ever would. But that doesn't mean she can't open her heart to love another person. My mother laughs, smiles, dances, and sings when she cooks. I thought about telling her what Jude had told me, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't guarantee she would feel better knowing the finer details, and I didn't want to take that happiness away from her either. The full secret isn't out, so I won't take risks. "Promise me you'll come out this weekend with me," he says. "Why?" I ask. I'm reluctant with parties, especially ones concerning alcohol. Peer pressure is a pain in the butt, and no matter how much you tell yourself, 'I'll never listen to what they say,' you'll still end up chugging back three beers in five seconds and feel completely horrible afterwards. "Because you're my best friend and I want to hang out with you." He smiles. "Sounds more like you want a wing woman who will offer a lift afterwards," I point out. Kyle's parents aren't too crash hot with the idea of their son drinking, mainly because of age and his stupidity. I've lost count by the amount of hours I've hauled his butt out of a toilet and force feed him bread to soak the alcohol up. "Well." He pauses. "I need someone to make sure I'm not laying out on the lawn when the sprinklers go off," he teases. "You're so cheeky, you know that!" I lightly punch him in the arm. "You love it." He winks back. "Can I bring Blake?" I ask. "It's his party." Kyle frowns with confusion. "What?" I scream, "Since when is this happening?" "Since today? You didn't know about it?" he asks, regret swirling onto his face. "Obviously if I'm asking you about it. I wonder why he never mentioned it to me." I look down at the ground and play with a long blade of grass. I swirl it around my finger before pulling it out and throwing it over my shoulder. "Maybe he hasn't had a chance to ask you?" offers Kyle, "or perhaps it was a last minute thing?" Either of these things didn't make me feel any better, but they did offer a substance to pull me over until the truth comes out. Blake would have good intentions, I just needed to stop my brain from wandering away. Not everybody is as deceptive as Tori and Blake hasn't given me a reason to question him so far. "I'll come then," I say, changing the topic. If it's for Blake or whatever the heck he's doing, I'll be glad to come along and celebrate. In fact, I'd be happy to do anything with Blake. "Awesome, I'm happy." A wide grin spreads across Kyle's lips. "I'm sure it'll be fun." I bite my lip and nod my head. "It'll be amazing and you'll love it!" He tries to encourage me through an enthusiastic and over the top pep speech – all of which doesn't work on me. "I'm sure." I shrug my shoulders. "I guess we'll see." "Don't be a pooper." He throws another piece of fruit at me. "Just learn to have fun for once and stop worrying about everyone else's problems." "Listen," I say, "I'll catch up with you later." I sling my backpack over my shoulder and wave goodbye as I walk towards the school. I enter the lunch room and walk straight through. I avoid the gazes, the whispers and the odd expressions. I keep walking down the hall until I find the doorway for the library. The cool breeze from the air con blows past my face like a refreshing breeze. I find myself easily wandering deeper through the library with ease. I go to the back section and plop down in front of a bookshelf filled with fictitious stories. I press my finger against the spine of the books and run it across, reading each title as I see it. "I would read that," I whisper as my finger lands on a novel about a girl who gets sucked inside her book. "Why are you hiding out here?" someone asks. I look up to find Blake's green eyes gazing down on me. His arms are crossed over his chest tightly and his stance is tall, hard, yet soft at the same time. His lips are curled into a small quirky smile which begins to send my heart racing away. "Hiding, me, no." I briefly shake my head and continue to search through the stories, anything to avoid his gaze. "Then why are you here?" he asks. "Why can't I be here?" I ask. "Please tell me what's wrong, I can hear it in your voice." "Oh, nothing." I shake my head again. Blake drops to his knees and crawls forwards so that he's sitting next to me. He wraps one arm around me waist and kisses the side of my forehead. He then rests his head against mine and laces his fingers in-between mine. I lean in and kiss his cheek and squeeze his hand. "Tell me what's wrong so Blakie can fix it." "I said nothing's wrong." I pull back and rest my head against the book shelf. "Then why are you pulling away from me?" He tugs on my arm, which pulls my body back closer to his. "If I've done something wrong, tell me, please," he begs. "You're throwing a party and I didn't even know about it," I reply, defeated by his persistence. "I didn't know I was throwing one either, not until fifteen minutes ago when someone gave me a high five and said, 'see you Saturday', to which baffled me." "Then what's happening?" "Jude, that's what happened." He draws my hand to his face and gently presses a kiss against the skin on my knuckles. "But I would love for you to attend my party. That would complete my night." "I can't say no, can I?" I chuckle. "Nope, because it's my birthday and Mum is making awesome chocolate cake too." "Your birthday, I, uh, I didn't even realise." I frown. "Don't worry." He casually shrugs his shoulder, "I'm not a fan of birthdays always, but I'm excited to spend it with you and Lo." "Good, I'm excited too." "I'll have one free night to chillax, what could be better?" Blake releases my hand and stands to his feet, then offers both hands to me. I place my hands in his and he quickly tugs me to my feet, then wraps his arms around my waist. "What do you want for your birthday?" I ask. "You in a sexy dress." He smiles giddily. "I love your legs too, so don't cover them up." He winks. "I'm sure I can take those requests into consideration." I poke my tongue out. "But seriously, what do you want?" "Just you." I links his fingers through mine and begins dragging me through the library and out into the halls. "Can I at least help set up for the party?" "Sure." He nods his head, "I'd like that a lot."