Chapter 29

“WHAT do you want to tell me, Nic?” Penelope asked Nicholas when she agreed to meet him in her apartment. “This is so sudden…”

This is the first time that Nicholas chose her apartment as their meeting place whenever she wanted to see him. Most of the time, he would just tell her to see him at the church or somewhere near the church. Good thing that today is Friday, and Laura is in Justin’s house for housekeeping. She has someone that could look for Vince just for a few hours.

“I thought you wouldn’t want to see me again,” Nicholas replied and looked up at her. They were sitting side by side on her couch but has a safe distance between them. “It’s been weeks since I called you and asked if we could meet and talk.”

Penelope lowered her head. She doesn’t know what to say to Nicholas because she’s been avoiding him these past few days. She’s intentionally rejecting his calls and ignoring his messages. At the same time, she’s confused and bothered with all the things she learned about Vince and Justin. “I’m sorry, I’m just busy with some projects outside the clinic.”

“But Grace told me that you’re on vacation,” he said as he studied her face. “Penelope, is there something bothering you?”

Penelope looked up at him. Nicholas is giving him a look she has longed for years. In an instant, Penelope wanted to cry and hug him tightly. But does she still have the right to do that? And does it still matter to her?

She heaved a sigh. “Why do you want to talk to me?” she asked instead of answering his question. “I need to go back to the laboratory before sundown.”

“About Justin,” he said, put out his phone, and placed it on the table. A magazine preview where the man was a front model flashed on the screen. “Why didn’t you tell me that he’s a celebrity?”

“Is it important?” she said, trying to hide the sarcasm in her voice, but she failed.

“Don’t use that attitude to me, Penelope.” Nicholas scolded her like an older brother, and Penelope hated it. “Why didn’t you tell me that your boyfriend is a famous celebrity?”

“I thought you knew,” she said, avoiding his gaze. “He’s famous. I thought you have seen him on the internet or elsewhere. So how did you find out?”

“One of the youth church workers told me that the man that they saw you with looked like the famous bachelor on TV,” he said and drew his brows together. “I searched his name online, and I found out also that he had a previous case of pedophilia.”

Penelope smirked. “He’s not proven guilty,” she said and looked at his phone. “Since you’ve learned how to use the internet now, you should have search also the latest news about him.”

“Penelope,” Nicholas gave him a warning look. “Do you really know that guy?”

“Justin is a good person,” she said. “He’s caring, sweet, and adorable. He’s the best guy that I’ve met.” When she noticed Nicholas’s scowl at her, she continued. “Well, next to you.”

“Do you love him?” Nicholas asked in a low tone.

Penelope wasn’t sure of what she sees in Nicholas’s eyes. Is it sadness? Regrets? Is he finally realizing her worth in his life?

“Why do you want to know?” she asked back. “Since when you started to care about my feelings?”

“I love you, Penelope,” he said instead, his gaze never left her eyes. “You know that I love you—”

“But not the way that I love you, right?” she laughed. “But it doesn’t matter anymore. I’ve moved on.” She raised from her seat. “I’ve learned to accept that I can’t have you.”

She was about to walk towards the door when Nicholas grabbed her hand. The man stood so close to her that she could smell his aftershave smell. “Penelope…” His hand caressed her skin. “Don’t be like this to me—”

“It’s you who taught me to be like this to you, Nic,” she said in a stern voice. “Do you remember how you shunned me away? How you tell me to stop seeing you even if I have already told you how I really feel?”

The man looked into her eyes. His eyes were speaking to her, but she can’t comprehend what he wanted to tell her. Penelope met his gaze, and she was surprised that her knees didn’t turn to jelly while looking straight into his beautiful eyes. Her gaze lowered on his lips and imagined kissing them, exploring his mouth, and tasting him…

Before she knew it, Nicholas’s mouth was on hers. He’s kissing him in a way that she has dreamed of before. His kisses went deeper until she’s out of breath. He let go of her lips to breathe some air and claimed it again in a second.

Penelope didn’t expect this to happen. But she thought that maybe this is the right time to see if the intense feelings that she has for his best friend before are still there. This is the perfect moment to see if his feelings for him were now replaced by her blooming attraction towards Justin.

Her thoughts were interrupted when Nicholas grabbed the strap of her Boho dress and ripped it off from her. Penelope gasped for what he did. She looked at him questioningly, and what he only saw in his eyes is a mix of lust and anger.

“Nicholas…” she called him softly and touched his arm. “You don’t have to do this…” Tears fell from her eyes. She loves him so much, and she doesn’t want to see him suffer like this. “I’m sorry…”

Nicholas lowered his head. “I love you…” he whispered. “I want to touch you, to kiss you… I want to own you, Penelope.” His tears fell on his cheeks. “But I can’t… I can’t just do that—”

“I know… I know, Nic… That’s why I’m letting you go now,” she murmured and stepped forward to hug him, but the man stepped back.

“Please, don’t…” he said, making an imaginary barrier between them. “If you’ll touch me again, I might not control myself and committed a sin.”

It stabbed her heart, but Penelope knew that she deserved this kind of punishment for desiring and seducing a priest…

***