Chapter 18 Use Your Head
Fiona
I haven’t moved since Varek left my room. I’m sitting with my back against the wall, wondering how the hell I’m ever going to face him again, knowing that he’s been told that I had a wet dream about him.
Goddess, he’s such a fucking bastard. He probably came up here just to gloat.
The urge to beat the shit out of his guards and run away bubbles up again, but I can’t do that because I don’t want to end up chained to the wall.
The door opens, catching me off guard. I scramble to my feet, but when I recognize that it’s just Liora, I sink back down.
“What’s wrong with you?” she asks, bringing in a tray of food. “You look like you’re pondering trying to jump out the window.”
“Too bad there are bars on it,” I mumble. Not that I’d ever kill myself. I wouldn’t give Varek the satisfaction of knowing that he had that sort of power over me. “I’m fine. I just… Varek was here.”
“Alpha Varek?” she corrects me, setting the food tray on the end of my bed. I know I should eat it. I need the protein, the energy, but my stomach is tied in a knot at the moment.
“Yeah, that guy.” I roll my eyes, and she chuckles. “He knows about my stupid dream.”
One side of her mouth pulls up in a crooked grin. “Well, the guards do tend to talk. I’m sorry. It’s not that big of a deal, though. Lots of women have those sorts of dreams about him. He’s a very good-looking guy.”
“Have you ever had one?” I ask, moving toward the tray. The scent of warmed meat hits my lungs as I pull the lid off. Maybe I’m hungry after all.
“Hell no,” Liora says quickly. “And if I did, I would never admit it.”
That makes me laugh. I pick up a slab of meat and take a bite. “I guess you don’t have a group of people standing right outside your door. Goddess, do they count my farts and report those to him, too?” I take another bite, and she laughs like a hyena.
“You’re funny. It’s too bad you’re the sworn enemy or whatever. So, Ronan has been working on getting permission for us to spar. I just talked to him, and he says he’s pretty sure Varek is going to let it happen. He just needs a few more days to talk him into it.”
“Is that possible?” Juice runs down my chin, so I pick up a napkin off the tray and wipe it, not caring all that much that I’m not being very ladylike. “Is Ronan capable of talking him into doing anything?”
She shrugs and leans her weight onto the windowsill. “If anyone can, it’s him. They’re afraid you’re going to try to run away again.”
“I can’t promise that I won’t,” I admit.
Her eyes narrow on me. “That’s not the best attitude to have, Princess. You’ve got to realize that there’s no way that you can get out of here. Even if you managed to get out of the sparring ring, there are warriors everywhere, and the mountain is treacherous. Not only are there jagged cliffs everywhere, there are sinkholes, icy crags that you can break through and fall to your death, and plenty of rogues who won’t give a shit who you are. If they find you, they’ll kill you. That’ll be a lot easier to do if you slide down the mountain and break a paw.”
“What would you have me do?” I set the bone I’ve cleaned down on my plate and wipe my hands and face. “If you were in my position, Liora, what would you do? Just sit here and let yourself be sold to some stranger? Some Alpha you aren’t at all attracted to?”
She blows out a puff of air. “No, I don’t think I would do that.”
“Okay, so… what are my choices? Either I stay here and let Varek do what he will with me, or I try to get away from here.”
“Or… you cooperate, you dumb bitch,” she says, shaking her head.
“What? How the hell would that do me any good? Suck up to that asshole so he thinks he owns me and… what? Slit his throat when he least expects it? Actually, that’s not a bad idea.”
“I did not just tell you to assassinate the Alpha, Fiona.” Liora snorts and shifts her weight on her perch. “But… has it ever occurred to you that getting on his good side might be more beneficial than continuing to be a pain in his ass?”
I shake my head. “I don’t think that’s possible, Liora. I’m pretty sure your Alpha doesn’t have a good side.”
“You’d be surprised. If he were just a horrible tyrant, no one in the pack would want to do what he asks, now would they? He’s actually a pretty nice person when he needs to be. He takes care of the widows and orphans, visits the wounded and the families of those who have passed, and once I even saw him save a kitten he found out in the woods.”
“Ooh, a kitten!” I roll my eyes again, but it actually is touching to think of him helping a small animal like that–instead of biting its head off. “I honestly don’t think there’s anything I could do to ingratiate myself to him, Liora.”
“Well, you should try.” She kicks off the wall and heads to the door. “And if he lets us fight, and you try to run away, I will personally hunt you down and end you. I don’t like to be taken advantage of, got it?”
“Got it.”
She leaves, and I let out another loud sigh. Liora is completely right. I shouldn’t even consider trying to run away if Varek is kind enough to let me leave this tower to go to the sparring ring with Liora. But sometimes my impulses cause me to do things I wouldn’t normally do, so I can’t guarantee that I won’t try to run.
Right now, running is the only thought I have on my mind.
Well, that and fucking the Alpha, but I can’t voice that thought again. Not if I know what’s good for me.
But then, maybe that’s what Liora was trying to say. If I can work my way into Varek’s bed, would he be so willing to sell me?
I don’t know, and I’m too scared to find out.