Chapter 37 – Closer to the Flame

Chapter 37 – Closer to the Flame

The door had been closed for over twenty minutes, but Eva still felt as if the man’s presence lingered in the room. The air was heavy with something unspoken—something that clung to Noah’s skin, to the way he moved, to the silence between them.

She sat on the couch, knees drawn up, watching him. He hadn’t stopped pacing since the stranger left. His bare feet moved soundlessly over the rug, but the tension in his body was loud enough to fill the space.

“You can’t just keep walking in circles forever,” she said quietly.

“I’m thinking,” he replied, still pacing.

“Looks more like you’re running,” she murmured.

He stopped, halfway across the room, his back to her. The muscles in his shoulders flexed, and she could see him draw in a slow, controlled breath before turning. “I’m not running. I’m trying to keep you safe.”

“And in your head, keeping me safe means keeping me in the dark?”

His jaw tightened. “Sometimes, yes.”

“Not to me, Noah.” Her voice was soft, but it carried a weight that made him flinch. “You’re not protecting me when you shut me out—you’re protecting yourself from what I might think of you.”

That hit home—she saw it in his eyes. But instead of answering, he came closer, lowering himself onto the coffee table so he was right in front of her. His knees brushed against hers, the closeness making her pulse jump despite the tension between them.

“If I tell you everything, you’ll look at me differently,” he said.

“Maybe,” she admitted. “But at least I’d be looking at you knowing the truth.”

He searched her face, as if trying to decide whether she could handle it. Finally, he sat back slightly, his elbows resting on his thighs, his hands clasped.

“When we were together before,” he began, “I was already in over my head with people I never should’ve gotten involved with. It started small—work connections, favors, things that didn’t seem dangerous at first. But it got darker fast. And I… I thought I could keep it separate from you.”

Her fingers tightened around the throw pillow she held. “You didn’t tell me because you didn’t want me to see that side of you?”

“I didn’t tell you because if you knew, you’d become a target.” His eyes darkened as he spoke, as if remembering every moment of those years. “These weren’t people who made empty threats. They knew exactly how to break someone without leaving a mark. And they knew about you.”

Her stomach dropped. “So he—”

“That man,” Noah said, voice low, “was the one who made it clear I had to walk away. He told me, point-blank, that if I stayed with you, they’d come after you, your family, your friends—everyone close to you. He didn’t even need to raise his voice. I knew he meant it.”

Eva swallowed hard, fighting the knot rising in her throat. “And your solution was to let me believe you just… stopped loving me.”

His expression twisted, a mixture of regret and pain. “I thought it was the only way you’d move on, the only way you wouldn’t go looking for answers. I needed you to hate me, Eva. I thought it would keep you safe.”

She shook her head slowly, her voice breaking. “Do you have any idea what it did to me? How long it took to even breathe without thinking about you?”

“I do,” he said quietly. “Because it was the same for me. Every damn day, I wanted to come back. I just… couldn’t.”

Silence stretched between them, but it wasn’t empty. It was thick, alive with the weight of all the things they’d buried for years.

Her eyes drifted over his face, memorizing the lines time had carved into it, the faint shadows under his eyes, the scar along his jaw she’d never seen before. He looked older, harder… but when his gaze met hers, she still saw the boy who used to make her laugh until she cried.

“I don’t know if I can just… forget,” she whispered.

“I’m not asking you to forget,” he said, leaning forward so their knees pressed together again. “I’m asking you to let me make it right. However long it takes.”

Her chest tightened. She wanted to believe him—God, she wanted to—but part of her still feared what else might be buried under the surface.

“What if he comes back?” she asked.

“He will,” Noah said without hesitation. “Men like him always do. And when he does, I won’t run this time.”

There was something in his voice—fierce, unyielding—that made her believe him, even if she didn’t want to.

She leaned back into the couch, the throw pillow slipping from her grasp. “You’ve always been good at making promises in storms, Noah. The question is… can you keep them in the sunlight?”

A faint smile touched his lips, but his eyes stayed serious. “I’ll keep them in the dark, in the light, in hell itself if I have to.”

The way he said it made her heart ache, and she hated that her body still reacted to him, even now. His hand reached for hers—hesitant, giving her the chance to pull away. She didn’t.

When his fingers curled around hers, the contact was electric, like touching a live wire. The years between them dissolved in that moment, replaced by something that had never truly left.

They sat there in silence, their joined hands a fragile bridge between past and present. Outside, the drizzle had stopped, but the street still glistened under the streetlights, each drop reflecting the gold glow.

It struck Eva then—storms didn’t always end when the rain stopped. Sometimes, they lingered in the air, waiting for the next crack of thunder.

And with the man from Noah’s past back in their lives, she knew the next storm wasn’t far away.

Still, for tonight, she didn’t let go of his hand.

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