Chapter 10

Kildare, Ireland – Saturday.

Rae.

Spending the majority of my time daydreaming about being with Edmund again I amble through the keep, heading to the kitchen. I am secretly hoping to avoid Ciara, after the blow up between her and Rian this week at Wicklow I don’t want to abandon my best friend, but it is a real bummer to have to hide my happiness when she is so down.

“We are moving!” Ciara tells me as I enter the kitchen.

“We are? To where?” I ask Ciara, taking my seat next to her, my eyes dart to Edmund and I try not to linger on him too long. “Like just us? The two of us, roomies?” My stomach twists in knots as I speak.

“Yes! Dad is going to fix up the far cottage for us this week and said we can move in once it is ready!” I squeal with my best friend, but inside I am torn.

“What about me?” Edmund asks from his seat, I look over and see the pout on his lips. This is exactly what I am torn about. Being so close to him here allows me to sneak down to his apartment any time day or night and it is incredible. Being on the other side of the property and having to dodge Ciara is going to make things difficult for us.

“There are only two bedrooms. So, unless you want to share with Rae…” Ciara is teasing him. But he is pissed that I’m entertaining this idea and not talking to him about it. I can see it written all over his face. Picking up his plate he storms out of the kitchen.

“What? What did I say?” Ciara continues to tease him. I chew on my lip, knowing I am going to pay for this later. My nerves are a wreck, I should be happy about this move, excited even. But I’m dreading it. “Did I offend?” Ciara is still calling after him and when she turns to me I force myself to giggle with her.

As Aunt Melody comes into the kitchen, Ciara grabs me, pulling me from the room, and down the hall. Explaining the entire way that she has not told her mom we are moving out and we need to get out of here before she finds out. I’m still lost in thought about Edmund and not sure what I am going to do.

A promise of coffee and breakfast while planning out the new place with my best friend lifts my mood. But when we make it to The Black Bean Ciara is too busy looking out the window for any signs of Rian and I am too busy pouting over losing my proximity to Edmund that we aren’t much for talking.

“Ciara?” I call her name as she looks out the window. “Do you want to talk about it?” She just shakes her head at me and goes back to looking out the window.

“Okay, but can I just say one thing?” I hold my hands out to her, trying to coax her into listening to me. “He loves you. Call him. Let him know you’re here for him. Then give him as long as he needs, but don’t shut him out for too long.” Ciara just nods, and I smile at her.

Picking at the muffin on my plate, I think about what I’m going to say to Edmund when I get home, and try to figure out what he is going to say to me.

“Hey, I thought you’d be more excited about this?” Ciara asks me and I just shrug.

“I am. I’m just thinking, planning. Decorating in my mind.” I smile at her and nod. Hoping that she is at least a bit convinced.

* * *

Edmund.

I head to my apartment with my breakfast and sit down at the kitchen island, thinking through what this means for us. If Rae moves out of the keep I won’t have the constant access to her that I have enjoyed the past few days.

We are going to have to sneak around like teenagers and that is ridiculous. I won’t stand for it. I mull over the idea of forbidding her to move out, but I know that will never work. Plus, I’m not that kind of man, and she is most certainly not that kind of woman. She may let me be in charge at times, but I have no delusions in believing that I am in any way the boss of Rae.

My phone dings, excited that it might be Rae I quickly slip it from my pocket. I see a message from an ex of mine.

Carley: Hey Sexy! Want to get together tonight?

I quickly dismiss the text, not even giving her the time to respond. Carley and I broke up about a year ago when I realized who Rae was to me. While she was fun, always having to hide who I truly am when I was with her was exhausting. At the end she went a little nuts on me, thankfully, I dodged that one.

I push my plate across the counter and head to the shower, deciding that I need to scald away my worries and work on clearing my mind.

* * *

Rae.

When I get back to the keep I go looking for him, I need to find Edmund. I need to talk to him, be close to him, and touch him.

Quietly I knock on the apartment door, trying not to draw too much attention to myself. Though why, I’m not sure. It isn’t like I’ve never been seen down here before or that it would be odd for me to be here.

Edmund opens the door with a towel wrapped around his waist, water droplets across his chest glisten and his hair is damp. He clearly just got out of the shower. I swallow hard at the sight of him, squeezing my thighs together, remembering the night we had. The soreness on my ass all of a sudden feeling more intense at the sight of him.

“Hi.” I smile and wave at him.

“Hi.” He opens the door for me and I walk into the living room.

“We need to talk.” I turn and look at him as he closes the front door behind me.

“We do, Rae. We really do. Let me get dressed.” I swallow hard again when he turns and makes his way down the hall, halfway there he pulls the towel off of himself and I get a glimpse of his muscular ass, just before he closes the bedroom door behind himself. Catching my lower lip between my teeth I consider following him and stripping down with him. But I know that would just be a way for me to avoid the inevitable and it wouldn’t be healthy.

Still contemplating it, though, I sit for a few more moments, then stand and make my way down the hall. I am almost to the door when it is opened and a fully clothed Edmund exits the room.

“Was I taking too long?” he asks, raising an eyebrow, his hair is still wet and a mess on top of his head. I consider running my fingers through it and pulling him to me for a kiss.

“Oh, no. I was just considering joining you… in your state of undress. But it looks like I waited too long.”

“That’s a shame, kitten, next time.” He winks at me and takes my elbow leading me back down the hall to the living room. I pout the entire way. Kicking myself for not deciding sooner to follow him.

“So, you’re moving out?” His tone isn’t accusing, but it is something I can’t put my finger on.

“It looks like we are, in about a week or two.” I shrug. “What was I supposed to say to her, Edmund? Look at what is going on with Rian, I don’t know what to tell her. I can’t just make her move out on her own. The only option I see here is to go.”

“Or tell her the truth.”

“The truth?” I ask, shocked by his abruptness. “What is the truth?”

“That you’re my mate. We’re together. We are in a relationship, Rae. That you don’t want to move because it will mean you’re further from me. Or to hell with that. If you tell her the fucking truth I can come there and it won’t matter how far you are because shit would be out in the open.”

“So you want to tell everyone?” I throw my hands in the air.

“I’m not saying everyone. I’m saying maybe Ciara should know.”

I jump up from the couch. “I don’t. I can’t. Edmund, we don’t even know what is going on between us yet.”

“We don’t, Rae?” His voice is full of anger now, and I flinch back. “Last I checked you knew exactly what was going on. You’re my mate. I am yours and we are together. Aren’t we?” The hurt in his eyes breaks me and I’m left just shaking my head.

“This is too much, it is all too much. I’m still processing this. You’re Edmund for fuck’s sake.”

“Yes, I am!” He stands from the couch and comes toward me. “I know exactly who I am and who you are and I’m just fine with it. Now is the time to tell me if you’re not.”

“I am… I want this.” I chew on my lip. Sick to my stomach at how close this conversation is treading to being something terrible between us. “I want to be with you!” I shout the last part at him because he is pacing the room not looking at me and the anger rolling off of him is scaring the hell out of me.

Edmund looks up at me and his eyes are glowing amber, he moves toward me so fast I hardly see him and we collide. His lips on mine, hands in my hair he pulls my body against his rough and hard. I turn into a wild animal, backed against the wall I nip at his lips, finally getting to run my fingers through his hair I pull his mouth down on mine harder.

“Take your fucking pants off,” he growls in my ear and I nod, unbuttoning them and slipping them down quickly. I kick out of them the rest of the way and my hands fly to the button on his jeans next. As soon as I have him free he lifts me by the waist.

My legs wrap around his waist and he slams me back against the wall so hard that my head bounces off of it and I have to blink back tears for a moment. One of his hands wrapped in my hair, the other around my neck, while I’m pinned to the wall with my legs around him. I look into his glowing eyes.

I know this is going to be rough, hard, and fast and I’m craving every second of it. “Fuck me, sir,” I purr at him, licking my lips. He nods slightly and drops his hand from my hair just long enough to take hold of his cock and push his way into me.

Then he jerks my head back, his tongue trails up over my collarbone and neck, to my ear lobe. He nips at me the whole way, I can feel his fangs on my skin and goosebumps spread over my body.

Edmund fucks me then, back slammed against the wall he pounds into me over and over. Hand still wrapped around my neck he pins me to the wall the entire time. “Did you need me to remind you, Rae? You needed me to show you who you belong to. Show you who I really am?”

I nod slightly, I can’t speak, he has my throat pinned.

“That’s right. You wanted me before. But now what’s wrong? Now, I’m just Edmund again? I’ll show you who I really am, Rae.” He punctuates his words by shoving me back against the wall harder, shaking me like a rag doll and I nod at him.

“Sir!” I croak out the word.

“What? You want to come? You want to come all over my cock while I fuck you like the slut you want to be? Too bad, Rae. I want to come, too, but I can’t. This is just your reminder that you’re mine. All mine.” Just then he steps back from he, hand leaving my throat and I gasp. When he places them on my waist and lifts me from him I don’t unwrap my legs from his hips. I don’t move my eyes from his.

“Fuck me, Edmund,” I whine at him.

“No, Rae. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Think about it.”

“So, if I don’t tell Ciara, and the rest of the family, that you’re my mate and we are together then I don’t get to fuck you? You’re giving me an ultimatum? All of this because I’m moving to a cottage fifteen minutes away, Edmund?” He is still holding me, I still refuse to unhook my legs from around his waist.

Sighing, he backs away from the wall and carries me to the couch, he sits down with me on his lap still facing him, I glare into his eyes.

“This is about you refusing to admit it to yourself, even though you said the words the night before last. I know you’re still fighting it, Rae.”

“We need to slow down, back up. This has all gotten out of hand. I don’t even know what the hell we’re fighting about anymore.” I place my hands on the sides of his face and pull him toward me, kissing his lips softly, running my tongue over his bottom lip until he parts them and I can slide it into his mouth, twirling my tongue with his. I love the way he tastes.

“Edmund,” I murmur his name against his lips, “you’re not losing me. You’re not going to lose me because I am moving out of the main house.” I watch him flinch slightly and know I have figured it out, figured out exactly what all of this was about. His fear of losing me.

“Rae, I’m sorry.” Dropping his head forward, he rests his forehead on mine.

“I’m sorry too. I don’t want to lose you. I’m not going to, we will figure this out. But I don’t want to tell anyone yet. I want to have this time, just us. I want to enjoy just being the two of us, with our secret. Please. For now?”

He nods and I smile at him. Still sitting on his lap naked from the waist down, when he shifts under me on the couch I moan.

“You can’t use sex as a weapon against me. That’s not fair,” I tell him, wanting to set the boundary and make it clear to him now.

“Then neither can you.” He clears his throat.

“I haven’t,” I scoff, upset he is accusing me of doing so.

“You have. That’s exactly what you were going to do. Going out and finding another man at the pub, Rae, to use it against me to push me away.” I drop my eyes to my lap and refuse to look back up at him, he is right and I know it. But I haven’t admitted that to myself until now.

“We’re dysfunctional.” I laugh out the words and he smiles at me.

“A little,” he agrees and we both sigh.

“I’m not leaving you. Just the main house. I will be back every night, sir. I promise. Ciara expects me to be out every night like I have been anyway, she just doesn’t need to know I’ll be right here.”

“I don’t want you to leave tonight.” Edmund nuzzles into my neck.

“I’m not moving for at least a week,” I reassure him.

“I know. I just mean I don’t want you to go tonight. Stay here with me. Now that I’ve had you in my bed and in my arms when I wake up I don’t think I can go without it, Rae.” His confession warms my heart and I smile at him.

“I’ll stay, what’s the plan?”

* * *

Dublin, Ireland.

Carley.

I know he is with her, ignoring my texts. Ignoring me, acting like we don’t have something together. I sit in my apartment and wonder how I am going to go about this. How I am going to eliminate her.

Then I get an idea, all I have to do is wait for her to be out alone again, and she will. I know she will. She is nothing but a whore who goes out every night anyway. I’ll make my way back to Kildare tomorrow and wait.