Chapter 104 The Light at the End

Chapter 104 The Light at the End
I stroked his hair gently. "You did what you had to do," I continued softly. "For me. For us."
"I'd do it again," he replied. 
"I know," I said, kissing the side of his head. "But you're allowed to feel it, too. It's okay to hurt."
Zephyr fell silent for a long moment before finally speaking, his voice low. "Christina was there," he admitted quietly. "She saw it happen. She watched me kill her father."
I tensed. "Oh."

He drew back to meet my eyes, watching my face. "Earlier, she said she was different now, claiming therapy had changed her. She even said she wanted to apologize to you." He exhaled, looking away. "But now, after seeing what I did to him… I don't know if she still feels the same."
He shook his head. "I don't know if she's really changed at all, or if this just pushed her right back to hating us."

Zephyr scoffed bitterly. "But who cares? I'm never going to forgive her for what she did to you."
He was right. I'd never be able to forget what Christina did to me either.
The betrayal. The pain. The trauma. It would always be there.
But now, in this moment, I found I couldn't bring myself to hate her completely. Maybe it was knowing she'd watched her father die right in front of her, which is something no one should ever have to endure, no matter what they'd done.

I sighed, glancing down at my hands. Sometimes I hated myself for it. Sometimes I hated that I had this conscience that wouldn't shut up. That wouldn't let me be cruel when maybe I deserved to be.
But all in all, something good, something worth holding onto had come out of today, thanks to Zephyr.
We had the doll.
I would be free.
And that was the light at the end of my dark tunnel.

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WEEKS LATER. 

Athena finally returned home to her pack. Nigel had been killed, forcing her father to step in and claim leadership as the new Alpha of Nigel's former pack.
On the day she left, it was painfully clear to anyone watching how difficult it was for her and Troy to say goodbye. They barely spoke, but their feelings were evident in their eyes.
I saw them hang around the car, both at a loss for words, especially Troy. 

It was obvious how much he wanted to say, but wouldn't. He'd convinced himself he didn't deserve love, or anything good.
And Athena… Athena was love itself. She was light.
The incandescent glow to his darkness.
The salve to every raw, festering wound inside him.
Meanwhile, Slade and Harold were busy thanking Zephyr and me for keeping his daughter safe, but I wasn't really listening.
I couldn't take my eyes off those two.

I felt so unbelievably sad for them, because they deserved each other, even if neither of them knew how to say it. They had become close in ways they probably had not admitted to themselves. Troy worked hard to hide how much he had grown fond of her, but it was clear to me.
I could see right through him... the way he looked at her when he thought no one was watching, the gentle tone that slipped into his voice when he talked to her... when he spoke her name.

After Athena finally climbed in and they drove off, Troy turned without speaking, walking back into the mansion.

Beyond our own troubles, the news had been dominated by Elliott Sinclair's death for the past few weeks.
The official story was a heart attack. 
Christina managed the press conference on her own. She remained calm behind her black sunglasses while reading a statement in her shaky yet cold voice. 
We watched it on TV in the living room. The footage switched between Christina at the podium and her mother beside her, crying into a black lace handkerchief.
She'd divorced Elliott a while back, which was why she hadn't been there when Zephyr stormed the mansion.

There was no telling what Christina might do next, whether she'd try for revenge again or not. We could only hope she was smart enough to let it go, for her own good and everyone else's.
I suspected part of the reason she was still alive was because Zephyr didn't want to wipe out the family line completely. 

Back in the Wrath Pack, things were changing.
Alice, for one.
Accusing her of trying to poison me, even if we'd been wrong, had shaken her. It was like being forced to see herself through our eyes had finally snapped something inside.
She didn't exactly become my best friend. But she did become better. Softer. She stopped shooting those jealous looks my way. Stopped talking shit behind my back. Stopped glaring at me when I walked by with Zephyr's hand in mine.
Instead, she'd nod politely or even greet me first.

The rest of the pack changed, too.
Word must have leaked about my infertility… that it wasn't natural. That someone had done this to me. It didn't take a genius to figure out who might have let that detail slip, either.
Alice.
Maybe it was guilt. Maybe it was pity. Or maybe they were just tired of hating me.
I really didn't care why.
What mattered was that the harsh, judgmental glares eased. The cold shoulders relaxed. Conversations began to include me instead of stopping or lowering to hushes when I approached.

Bit by bit, they began to see me as their Luna. Not as the human outsider who would never fit in... the one they merely tolerated because of Zephyr.
It was a relief I hadn't realized I wanted so badly. 
As for the curse, we flew back to London when Agnes let us know it was time.
The unbinding wasn't easy; it hurt like hell.
But Zephyr was there, beside me, holding me while I writhed on the floor of the shaman's small room.
When we flew home after that, I slept half the flight with my head in his lap, feeling free.

The fear was gone. The pressure of failure, of shame, of not being enough for my husband, for the pack, for myself was gone.
I felt whole and ready. 

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Zephyr knelt in front of me as I sat on the edge of our bed. His hands rested on my knees, his face contorted in worry.
We'd had this conversation a hundred times over. But now that the moment was finally here, I could see fear in his eyes, I'd seen only once.
"I'm not ready to do this, Lyla. I thought I could be. I've been telling myself I'd be strong enough for you, but…" He stopped and huffed out a breath. "I don't want to lose you, Wildflower."

I touched his cheek, feeling how tense it was under my palm, but he wouldn't look at me.
"Zeph," I said softly. "Look at me."
Slowly, and with reluctance, he raised his eyes.
"You won't lose me."
"I'm terrified," he confessed so quietly that I almost didn't hear it.
My heart twisted.
"I'm terrified you'll die." his voice was raspy. "I'm terrified I'll lose you in the worst way possible. I can't stand the thought of knowing I did it."