Chapter 27 Betrayal
CAITLYN’S POV
I walked to the bathroom at the end of the hall and locked myself inside. I turned on the shower so no one would hear me and then I sat on the floor and started crying. Not quiet tears but loud ugly sobs that came from somewhere deep inside me.
Everything was falling apart. In the span of a few hours, I had been threatened by gang members who wanted to kill Jason and anyone connected to him, and then I had walked in on my husband cheating on me in our own bed, and he had not even stopped when he saw me.
How could he do that? How could he just wave me away like I was nothing? I was his wife. I was carrying what he thought was his child and he did not care at all, maybe he never cared.
Maybe this whole marriage was just about appearances and control and whatever shady business he was running. Maybe I had never been anything more than a prop in his perfect life.
I thought about all the times he had told me he loved me. All the times he had played the devoted husband in front of other people. It was all fake, all of it. He did not love me, he probably never loved me.
I did not know how long I sat on that bathroom floor crying. It could have been ten minutes or an hour. Time did not mean anything anymore.
Finally, the tears stopped, and I was just empty and numb. I felt like someone had hollowed me out and there was nothing left inside.
I heard footsteps in the hallway and then a knock on the bathroom door.
"Caitlyn." It was Collin's voice, calm and casual, like nothing unusual had happened. "Come out. We need to talk."
I did not answer. I could not look at him right now, I could not hear whatever excuse or explanation he was going to give.
"Caitlyn," he said again, and this time his voice had an edge to it. "Open the door. I can explain."
"Go away," I managed to say.
"This is my house," he said coldly. "And that is my bathroom. Open the door now or I will break it down."
I knew he would do it too. I slowly got up from the floor and unlocked the door.
When I opened it, Collin was standing there fully dressed, now like nothing had happened. Amanda was nowhere to be seen, she probably left as soon as she could.
"What you just saw," Collin started.
"Do not," I cut him off. "Do not try to explain it away or make excuses. I know what I saw. I’m not a child, nor am I a fool."
"Then you know it does not mean anything," he said. "It was just stress relief. It has nothing to do with you or our marriage. That's what I want to explain.”
I stared at him in disbelief. "You were sleeping with another woman in our bed. How does that have nothing to do with our marriage?"
"Because our marriage is not about that," he said like he was explaining something obvious to a child. "Our marriage is about image and family and building something together. What I do for physical release is separate from that."
"That is insane," I said. "That is not how marriage works."
"That is exactly how marriage works in my world," Collin said. "And you need to accept it because this is not going to change."
I felt like I had been slapped. "So you are just going to keep cheating on me and I am supposed to be okay with it?"
"I am not cheating," he said. "Cheating implies deception. I am being completely honest with you right now about what this is. Amanda is convenient and discreet and she understands the arrangement."
"I do not understand the arrangement," I said and my voice was rising. "I did not sign up for this."
"You signed up for it when you married me," Collin said and his eyes went cold. "You knew what kind of man I was. You knew I was not some romantic fool who was going to worship you forever.
You wanted the money and the house and the lifestyle and this is part of that package."
"I did not want any of this," I said. "I wanted a real marriage. I wanted someone who actually cared about me."
"Then you should have married someone else," Collin said simply. "But you married me and now you are carrying my child. So you need to figure out how to live with the choices you made."
The baby. He kept saying my child like it was actually his and I could not tell him the truth because that would make everything even worse. I was trapped in every possible way.
"What do you want from me?" I asked quietly.
"I want you to go to your room and rest," Collin said. "And I want you to forget what you saw today. It does not concern you and it does not affect our arrangement."
"Our arrangement," I repeated. "Is that what you call our marriage?"
"Call it whatever you want," he said. "But understand that this is how things are going to be. I need you to play your role as my wife. Be seen at my side, raise the child, and maintain appearances. What I do in private is none of your business."
I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to tell him exactly what I thought of him and his arrangement, but I was too tired and too broken and I did not have any fight left in me.
"Fine," I said. "I will stay out of your way. But I want you to stay out of mine too. No more telling me what to do, where to go, or who I can talk to. If this is just an arrangement then I deserve some freedom too."
Collin studied me for a moment. "As long as you do not embarrass me or cause problems with my business then fine. Do whatever you want, but remember that you are still my wife, and some expectations come with that."
He walked away and left me standing there in the hallway. I went to my room and locked the door behind me. I looked at the bed where just a little while ago Collin had been with another woman and I felt sick all over again.
I could not sleep in that bed. I could not even be in this room. I grabbed a blanket and went to one of the guest bedrooms down the hall. I curled up on the bed and stared at the ceiling.
My whole life had fallen apart in one day. Gang members threatened me. My husband betrayed me, and I was trapped with a baby that was not his, and no way out.
I did not know what I was going to do. I did not know how I was going to survive this. All I knew was that I could not keep
Ep living like this. Something had to change or I was going to break completely.