Chapter 140 What We Lose to Keep Standing
POV Luca:
When I enter the barn, Sebastian is in Salazar’s stall, saddling him. That strikes me as odd, after all, Dominic’s horse doesn’t allow anyone but him to ride him, but I decide not to say anything.
I take a quick look at Atrevido’s stall and sigh when I see him eating while Maya brushes his mane. I know the redhead has grown very emotionally attached to the horses, but I believe that, among all of us, she’ll be the one who will suffer the least with their sale.
“Luca?”
I look at Sebastian calling me, and I know I need to have this conversation with him right now. I can’t delay my decision. The bank needs the money.
“I need to talk to you,” I say, glancing at Maya, who’s so focused on what she’s doing that she hasn’t even noticed I’m here. “But not here,” I add.
“Did something happen?”
“Yes, and I need to talk to you about it.”
We leave the barn, and I choose a tree with wide shade for us to sit under and talk. As soon as Sebastian sits down, he doesn’t ask anything. He just looks at me and waits.
I take a deep breath, hating this shit. There are very few people I worry about hurting with my blunt way of speaking, and Sebastian is one of them. I never intended to hurt him regarding Scarlett, but I know I did—and badly. For a long time, he believed I had acted behind his back, but I never did that, and I never will.
“Sebastian, I’ve made a decision, and I want to explain my reasons to you.”
“Is this about Maya?”
Maya? Why does he think it has anything to do with her?
“No, it’s about Atrevido,” I say, and his face relaxes instantly.
“Alright. What about him?”
“I’m going to sell him,” I say outright. There’s no point in dressing up something I know will sadden him anyway.
“Sell him? Why?”
This is the moment to tell Sebastian everything. It’s time to share with my brothers the problems our parents have been facing for years. It’s time for us to come together as a family to save the farm that means everything to us.
I start telling Sebastian when the farm began having money problems. I tell him the real reason I had to drop out of college, the reason our parents traveled, and finally I show him the letter that arrived from the bank—the one that made me decide to sell Atrevido.
Sebastian stares at the letter for a while, and when I think he’s about to say something, my brother simply nods and hands it back to me before heading into the barn.
I stand up and follow him, but I stop at the entrance when I see him grab another brush and, beside Maya, silently start brushing Atrevido.
I swallow hard. I wish I could do the same, but I don’t think I’m capable of standing next to my horse without wanting to go back on my decision.
...
I watch Atrevido being loaded into his new owner’s trailer, and I feel sick to my stomach. Maya is crying, supported by Sebastian. She grew very close to the horses over the past few days and, until this moment, didn’t know about the sale. I didn’t have the courage to tell her—neither did Sebastian.
Dominic didn’t stay to watch Atrevido leave. My brother went straight to the bank. Right now, that’s our only concern.
I know Atrevido will be well taken care of, and in the sales agreement I asked to be allowed to visit him a few times, which the Burts granted. They were the only ones who made an offer worthy of the stallion Atrevido is. My eyes burn, and I hide it by looking away.
After the Burts take him, I go inside the house. I don’t feel well.
I’m sad, but it could have been worse if David had been the one to come get him. I know how much he wanted Atrevido ever since he was just a foal. It’s almost ironic how, in the end, he got him anyway.
I sit on the couch and pretend to watch television. As soon as my brothers come in, they sit near me and stay silent. I believe they know how sad I am, but they won’t say anything about my decision, because that’s what I asked of them.
After talking to Sebastian, I called Adrian and Mikhail and told them everything. My brothers supported me, even wanting to sell their own horses as well, but I was against it. At least for now, it isn’t necessary.
“Why did you sell Atrevido, Luca?” Maya asks as soon as she walks through the door. Her eyes are red, just like the tip of her nose. “He kept neighing nonstop when he went into that piece of shitty metal. He was calling you,” she says, and starts crying again.
“And you didn’t even say goodbye.”
I know he was calling me. But what was I supposed to do?
“Maya, please, don’t say anything,” I ask. I’m not in the right state to hear her judgment.
“I won’t,” she says, surprising me as she sits on my lap and wraps her arms around my neck. “If you sold him, I believe you had a reason. I can see how sad you are about it.”
I don’t say anything. I hold her body, letting the redhead comfort me, because I’m more than sad.
I’m destroyed.