Chapter 11

Riley set about making funeral arrangements for them the next day. I wondered where Krissie was since she had not been seen since the day of the attack. Apparently Riley wondered too, because he had people out looking for her, with no success.

The day of the funeral dawned pretty dismally. It was deeply overcast with the occasional sprinkle of rain. I wore a black sundress that had geometric designs on it with a bolero and flats—now wasn't the time to try heels, not in this weather. The outfit was the only suitable thing I had to wear. Riley looked riveting in a black three-piece suit, his hair pulled back into a tight braid.

Riley, Devie, Jasper, and I piled into the 300, with several more guards following behind us in the Suburban. The Alpha had wanted to go too, to show his support, but Riley and I had told him he did not need to. Knowing he wanted to go had been enough for me. He had just sighed and hugged me tightly.

We arrived at the funeral home, and despite it being what it was, it had a cute little ceramic cat on the roof, and before I was allowed out, Riley set the guards to patrol and give the all clear. I got out of the car and was immediately surrounded by Riley, Devie, and four guards. We walked into the building and was greeted right away by the Funeral Director.

He was very solicitous. He shook hands with Riley and me. He seemed a bit concerned that we would be upset at the fact the funeral would be closed casket, but Riley assured him that we understood and it would be fine.

Once things were sorted out with talking to the Director, we were escorted into the room where the caskets were held. I stared at them, half afraid they would open and their corpses would pop out and come for me.

Riley's hand tightened around my waist as he read what I was thinking. I shook the dark thoughts from my mind, not needing any more than I already had. We sat down, Devie on the other side of me and holding my free hand, since Riley had taken my other one once we had sat down.

No one but us and the guards was there. It was sad, that their life had come to this. No one caring that they had died. I couldn't understand how I felt. One minute, I felt nothing. The next, I was crying. Then, the minute after that, I was raging at myself for feeling anything but hatred for them. Riley and Devie assured me it was natural, but how could it be natural to feel anything for these people?

I vowed that after this day, no more tears. They were dead and gone, and that is where they would stay. I didn't need to spend any more of my energy on them. Tomorrow was a new day, and I was going to live it with a free and clear conscience. No more grieving for those who would never grieve or miss me.

I sat up straighter and kept my gaze ahead of me as the Director came to the front and started the service. I barely registered what was said. Something about being in God's hands now, their pain and suffering at an end. I scoffed and nearly snorted aloud. If there was a God, he sure as shit wouldn't let them enter heaven, I thought.

After the service, everyone stood up and walked outside to wait while the caskets were loaded into the hearses. I was surrounded by all the guards, with Riley and Devie in the middle with me. I thought it was a bit much at first, but then I thought of what we were attending and didn't think that again. I felt a bit like a mob wife, what with all the security.

Once they were loaded into the hearses, we all piled into our respective vehicles and followed them to the cemetery. It was a sad procession with only four cars, two of them hearses, and not counting the police escort.

As we got to the cemetery, it started to sprinkle. The ceremony at the graveside was quick because of the rain. There were two simple headstones denoting where each of them lay. The laying of them in the grave was even quicker.

I think we had spent more time at the Funeral Home then we had at the cemetery. Either way, I was glad when it was over. I just wanted to go home. I had not spoken more than a few words all day, Devie even less, even Jasper was unceremoniously silent.

I stared at their graves for a few minutes before letting Riley led me back to the car. I didn't plan on ever coming back to this place. Once in the car, I laid my head against the headrest and closed my eyes.

I opened them again when I felt gentle hands on my shoulders and start to lightly massage them. No words were said between Devie and me. None were needed. I was just grateful for her, and especially Riley. I don't know what I would have done without them.

Once home, I didn't say a word, just went straight into the bedroom to change. I threw the dress into the corner of the closet and decided I would burn it as soon as I could. Riley had followed me and was changing as well.

By unspoken agreement, we dressed for the gym and headed out, the ever-present guards following us. We worked out for hours, it had been night for a while by the time we were exhausted enough to leave.

The guards had switched out for the night shift, and I hadn't even noticed. They led and followed us home, making sure it was safe before we were let in. Sometimes I was sick of the guards. Other times I was grateful. Tonight I was sick of them because they kept me from going into the house as soon as we got there.

Once inside, I headed straight to the bedroom and plopped myself face down onto the mattress. I was asleep before my next breath.

I was awakened sometime later by Riley bringing me a bowl of something that smelled delicious. Despite how I was feeling emotionally, I found that physically I was famished.

The stew that Jaime had slow-cooked all day was fantastic. I was soon done and wanting more. Riley went to go get me another bowl, but I ended up following him and getting it myself. It was time to stop my pity party.

The conversation stopped once I entered the kitchen. Everyone looked guilty for having a good time. I felt instantly bad for making them feel guilty for being normal.

I took a deep breath, "Look, I know I've been hard to live with the last few days, and I am sorry. It's been a shock what happened, but I am determined to be over it. No need for you guys to stop having a good time because of me. Be yourselves, do what you normally do, it will help me to see you all just be."

Riley came to me and hugged me tight, next Jaime hugged me too. Jasper, who'd stayed out of concern, put an arm around my shoulders for a squeeze before grabbing my bowl and putting in some more stew.

With that, it seemed we were all fine and normal again. I hoped.

We all decided to go into the living room and watch a movie. Jasper picked a comedy, something about a group of middle-aged men getting together for the funeral of their old coach. It was actually really good. I found myself laughing quite a bit during the show.

I was yawning by the time the credits rolled, but I didn't want to go to bed. I was actually starting to feel like myself again, and I was afraid if I went to sleep, I would wake up full of self-pity again. I knew it was a foolish thought, but there was nothing I could do to stop it from cropping up.

I stretched then stood up. I grabbed the dirty dishes and headed to the kitchen to clean up. Jasper went to grab them from me, but a look from Riley stopped him. He knew I wanted normalcy, and this was normal for me. Doing dishes was mindless work, as well as soothing.

Once I had cleaned up and put away the leftovers, which there wasn't much of, I headed to the bedroom to shower. I wanted to get that gym grime off of me before going to sleep.

Riley ended up joining me in the shower. We didn't make love, just washed. We dried off then hopped into bed. He held me close to him, my head on his shoulder, my hand idly tracing his tattoos as I slowly fell asleep. He kissed the top of my head and whispered, "Goodnight my Sunshine." Then I knew no more.

***

I woke up in a surprisingly good mood. I looked over at the still sleeping Riley and smiled even wider. He was so peaceful when he slept. I loved to watch him sleep, heck I loved to watch him do anything. I simply loved him, and that made my heart sing.

I decided to let him sleep and got out of bed to dress. As I entered the living room, I noticed I wasn't the only one awake. Jaime was talking to the two guards who had replaced Jasper and Tina. I wasn't as familiar with these two as I was some of the others. I don't think they were part of the Pack. They must be from one of our allies.

"Good morning." I chirped once they had noticed me. Jamie smiled at me, and the two guards just nodded. Hmmmm, not very friendly, are they? I thought.

I walked over and held out my hand to the closer of the two. "I don't know if we were ever formally introduced, but my name is Poppy." The guard looked from my hand to the other guard then back again before generally taking it.

"I'm Pedro of the Were-Leopard Pack." He said in a surprisingly pleasant voice. I grinned at him, and he gave a small smile back, so small it almost wasn't there.

I turned to the other guard, who turned out to be the one who had fought Riley at the Claw Meet, and held out my hand. He refused it and grunted. "I'm Justin," was all he would say. I took an almost instant dislike of him. I let my hand drop and turned to Jaime.

"So, feel like showing me how to cook breakfast?" I asked him. He grinned, "sure. This should be interesting."

We were in the kitchen laughing and having a good time, like nothing bad had happened. I had pancake batter all over the front of my shirt, and I am sure there was some on my face as well. I have no idea how it had got all over me, but I think there was more of it on me then in the bowl I was currently mixing.

Riley walked in, hair loose and wearing just jeans, something he rarely wore. It was a nice change, especially since they looked like they were painted on him, accenting all of his attributes.

He stopped in his tracks when he got a look at me, his eyes widened, then he threw his head back and laughed. I stopped what I was doing and blinked at him, before squinting my eyes in mock anger and advancing on him with the pancake batter. He abruptly stopped laughing and watched me warily.

"Um, Sunshine, what are you going to do with that?"

I didn't say a word, just kept advancing. He started slowly backing away, but once I got close enough to him, I took the spatula with a huge glop of batter on it and smeared it down his chest. I heard a gasp behind me from Jaime, then a snort of muffled laughter.

I looked up at Riley, triumphant in my revenge. He was staring down at his chest in disbelief. I grinned, nodded my head, and went back to Jaime to continue my lesson.

I never saw him coming. One minute I was walking to Jaime, the next I was off of my feet, slung over a lean shoulder fireman style. I felt a heavy swat on my butt, making me squeal. I started squirming, "let me down this instant, you oaf!" I ranted at Riley. He just swatted my ass again, heavier this time. I squealed again, and I heard laughter from Jaime and the guards as I passed by.

I was unceremoniously dumped on the bed. I propped myself up on my elbows and glared up at Riley, then sniggered as I saw the batter still dripping down his chest. He looked from it to me. "You think that's funny, do you?" He asked. I nodded, not realizing the threat in his voice.

He got on the bed, straddling my legs before I knew it. He then took his fingers and gathered some of the batter. I eyed him warily, wondering what he was thinking, but suspecting it wasn't good.

He slowly dragged his fingers with the batter across my cheek. My eyes widened in surprise, then narrowed. If he wants a batter war, so be it, I thought.

I, too, scooped some of the batter from his chest and smeared it across his cheek in retaliation. Then the battle was on. We both tried to out smear each other with the batter. We ended up laughing our asses off and batter everywhere. Before I knew it, we were naked and making love, despite batter being in places I don't think it ever should be.

It was the most fun I had, had in a long time.

I was sprawled across Riley's chest, my chin resting on my hands as I looked into his eyes.

"Thank you," I said. His brow furrowed in puzzlement. "For what?"

"For being there for me. For making all the arrangements, and just for loving me. I don't know what I would have done without you these last few days, hell these last few weeks." I kissed his chest, "I really do love you."

He pulled me up so he could kiss me. "You don't have to thank me. We're life mates, it's my right, my honor to help you when you need me. You never have to ask. I will always be here for you. I love you and adore you." He kissed me again. Tears welled in my eyes when I realized just how lucky I truly was.

Some days I still couldn't believe this was my life now. How someone with a past like mine, so violent and hateful, could end up being loved by such a beautiful man. My life still had violence in it, but it wasn't the same. I don't know how to explain it, but this I could live with.

We made love again before getting up to shower and get off all the batter. It really was amazing where it could end up.

Riley ended up finishing my lesson on how to make pancakes with sausage and bacon on the side. It was a lot less messy then it had been with Jaime. It was like the batter knew better than to get on Riley.

Jaime and the guards had already eaten their breakfast, so Riley and I sat in the breakfast nook and had ours. We chatted about what we were thinking of doing today. Riley wanted to go for a run, but I wanted to get back to training. So we compromised and decided to go for a small run, then have my training for part of the day.

We cleaned our dishes and headed into the bedroom so I could shift. I wasn't comfortable yet shifting in front of others. It still takes me several minutes to shift because my focus was not the best. I didn't feel pain when I shifted, but I could feel the bones changing, and it would cause me to lose focus as I concentrated on it.

I stripped and put my clothes on the settee and walked to the middle of the room. Riley pulled out his phone and set to calling in more guards to run with us, both in wolf and human forms.

I took a deep breath and focused. I could feel my wolf wake up and start pacing. I've become more attuned to my wolf, and we had come to an understanding. Sort of.

I let my wolf know it was time for her to show herself, and I could feel her slowly trailing out of the dark place she tended to rest in when I wasn't needing her. My bones started to crack and shift in different places, fur started to slowly grow, and I forced myself not to get lost in the sensation.

For once, I was able to shift completely without having to stop to refocus. I was on all fours, and I did a little twirl in happiness that I had actually shifted with no issues.

Once I was done shifting and Riley had gotten more guards for us, he shifted as well. We went into the living room to wait for everyone to get here and lead us out. I'd only run a couple of times since I've been able to shift, and each time was enjoyable.

When we were ready, one of the guards opened the door for us that had shifted. The guards surrounded Riley and me, and we took off. Several guards, in both forms, scouted ahead.

We headed past the battle ring and out into the woods. Once out there, we took off as fast as we could.

We ran for a good hour, and I enjoyed it thoroughly. It helped clear out any cobwebs I had and just made me feel alive. Once we reached a destination only Riley seemed to know, we took a small break before heading back just as fast and hard as arriving.

We reached the edge of the woods near the fighting ring and stopped. I immediately plopped onto my side and panted. It had been a good run. I was glad Riley had suggested it.

Everyone seemed to be waiting for me to catch my breath, and I was a bit embarrassed that I had been winded when everyone else seemed to be fine. I really needed to get into better shape, I thought.

We headed back to the house so I could shift, since I still wasn't comfortable with nudity in front of others either. Shifting back into a human always seemed to be faster than shifting into my wolf. In half the time I was on two legs again. One of these days I would be as fast as Riley or close to it, I vowed.

I didn't bother with showering since I would be training, but I did towel off the sweat and dress.

Training was a bit rough today as Devie set about showing me some new moves that were a bit more complicated. She showed me how to incorporate everything I already knew and what she had just shown me into an actual fight. I took a licking, but I had given her just as much as she had given me—well, almost.

***

Jaime had dinner waiting for us again. He and Riley actually seemed to enjoy cooking, which was still a bit strange to me, because Mother and my sisters had hated cooking.

Tonight we had lasagna, something new to me. I quickly showered so I could have dinner with everyone. Riley was right behind me in showering as well. I dressed in a pair of pajamas with a cartoon of a sponge guy all over them. I had no idea who this Bob was, but he was sorta cute in a creepy way.

Jaime was just pulling out the second lasagna tray and setting it on top of the stove with the other tray. It looked delicious and smelled even better. He started dishing us all a plate.

The guards had taken to eating with us. It made sense. They had to have lunch breaks. No Were could go long without eating. Our metabolism wouldn't allow it. Once the inside guards had eaten, they switched with the outside ones to let them have food too. Then switched back.

We all sat in the living room since there wasn't an official dining room. I sat Indian style on the couch with Riley and Jaime beside me. Tonight was Riley's turn to pick a movie to watch. We'd started watching movies the night after the attack as a way to distract me, and I liked the idea of watching something while we ate dinner, so Riley had stated that we would keep doing it.

I was curious as to what Riley would pick to watch. I was betting horror or action. There was still so much I had to learn about my mate, and it was a bit exciting to me. He had so many layers I just knew it would take years to peel them all.

Riley had a small smirk on his face as he chose what we were to watch. Everyone around me gave either a groan or a cheer. I was really curious now.

I took a bite of the lasagna as he put in his choice. I nearly drooled, it was so good. Not too much sauce and a whole lot of cheese made it perfect. I was in heaven.

I jumped when the opening of the movie came on. It was a black screen, then text appeared. It talked about a rebel alliance and the force, whatever that was.

"What kind of movie is this?" I asked.

"It's Science Fiction," Riley replied around a mouthful of food. We were hushed by one of the guards, I believe his name was Tim. He was part of our Pack, but you'd never guess he was preternatural. He was tall, skinny, and had glasses. His hair looked unkempt, and he was unshaven. He looked like a typical nerd, at least that is what Jaime said. I had no idea what nerds looked like.

I divided my attention between the food and movie, and I must say the movie got most of my attention. I was more into this movie than I had been some of the action movies I was beginning to love.

I had finished my dinner and was still hungry but was too much into the movie to get up to get more. It was at a scene where the old mentor was fighting the bad guy, and I couldn't turn away.

Jaime ended up getting both him and me more, because he wasn't as big a fan of this movie as his brother or Tim apparently. I quietly thanked him, then cried out as the mentor was killed. I teared up.

"Nooo! Not Ben!" I cried and was shushed by everyone. Riley patted my back in sympathy, never taking his eyes off the screen.

A little later, when the movie was over and the outside guards where inside eating, Jaime and I were chatting about Riley. Turns out Riley was a closeted nerd. He loved Sci-Fi and Superhero movies, something I never expected.

"You giving up my secrets, little brother?" Riley growled at Jaime. Jaime just grinned at him, "Yep, I sure am, and there's nothing you can do about it."

"We'll see. Just wait till you get a girlfriend. I will bring out all those embarrassing photos of you as a pup."

"No you won't, cause Poppy won't let you."

I stared wide eyed at Jaime, "I won't?"

"No, you won't. Cause you love me, and you're my big sis. You'll keep my dignity safe."

I blinked several times as tears arose out of nowhere. I knew Jaime liked me, but I had no idea he saw me as his sister. I was still iffy about having siblings, but to know he saw me as a sister, that he completely accepted me, touched my heart. I started crying, and Jaime immediately tried to console me.

"Whatever I said, I didn't mean it, please don't cry. I didn't mean to hurt you." He cried.

I blubbered and tried to talk but couldn't. Riley sat down beside me and drew me into his arms as I cried all over his chest.

"She's not hurt, she's moved, little brother. She's happy that you accept her as family."

"Oh," was all he said. I felt awkward patting on my back and knew it was Jaime. I turned from Riley's arms and went into his, causing him to nearly fall off the couch from the unexpectedness of it.

Once he adjusted, he wrapped his arms around me clumsily. I stopped crying after a few minutes and sniffled.

I looked up at him, knowing I must be a sight. "Thank you. It means a lot to me for you to have said that." I then pulled away and wiped at my tears.

I set about making myself presentable again. I was ashamed of crying like that, but it had touched a part of me that I didn't think I had thanks to my sisters.

I yawned, and Jaime gathered the dirty dishes. Neither he nor Riley would let me do them tonight. They insisted I go to bed. I wanted to argue, but another yawn hit me.

I got up and Riley swatted my ass, "Go on to bed. I will be there shortly."

I waved goodnight to the guards and went into the bedroom. I dropped my clothes where they lay and jumped in bed. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow. It had been a good day.

I felt Riley get into bed and instinctively snuggled close to him before going back to sleep.

I woke up to loud bangs and a commotion. Riley was already out of bed and into the living room. The bangs had come from outside. I grabbed the quickest thing I could, one of Riley's shirts he had discarded. It hung to my knees. I buttoned it up halfway before running out of the room.

"Protect her!" I heard Riley shout as he vanished out of the front door. I tried to run after him, but I was quickly surrounded by guards. I growled in frustration.

"What's going on?" I demanded.

At first, no one answered, then Jaime was shoved into the circle too. When we both demanded to know, Hank, one of the Were-Leopards answered.

"Someone tried to get into the house. They attacked Jockey in surprise and tried to break down the door when Sampson shot at them. We think the bastard got hit, but we're are not sure."

I shifted from foot to foot, impatient to know what was happening out there and wondering if Riley was safe.

After what felt like hours, Riley finally came back in, two guards following him. I knew he was alright because of the bond, but it was still a relief to actually see him.

"The fucker got away again, but he was hit. We got trackers after him. Hopefully, we will have him soon."

I growled again. I was so sick of this wolf. Why didn't he just give up? I wasn't worth all of this trouble for him.

Riley went into the bedroom and came out a moment later with pants on. In all the commotion, I hadn't noticed he had run out completely naked.

I wanted to hit something. I was so pissed off and frustrated with this damn wolf. I was sick of him hurting and killing people. He needed to be put down like a rabid dog. I just wished I was the one who would do it, but I knew that wasn't feasible. I wasn't skilled enough yet. Since it couldn't, wouldn't be me, I just hoped it was Riley, and I hoped he dragged it out. I didn't want the bastard to be lucky and have a quick death. He deserved a slow, painful one.

Riley came to me and drew me into his arms. "We will get him, Sunshine. I promise. You are right, he deserves a slow, painful death, and I will make sure he has one."

I nodded. "Is Jockey okay?" I asked.

"He's fine, just a knot on the head is all. The bastard is lucky he caught him off guard because Jockey would have kicked his ass to hell and back before he knew what had hit him. Unaware is about the only way you can best Jockey." Owen, one of the guards who had come in with Riley, answered my question. Owen was of the rare Were-Hawks. He was a tall blonde with a hawk-like nose. He kept mostly to himself, but he and I got along fine.

I nodded again and sighed. "This whole situation is just bullshit. I am sorry for having dragged everyone into it. I don't want any more people hurt on my behalf." I knew that was asking too much, but I wished it.

I started pacing. "Why would he do this tonight? It's bold and a bit stupid, don't you think?" I asked no one in particular.

"He's getting desperate. He wants to finish what he started." Riley stated.

I frowned, not liking that my death was his unfinished business. But I knew he was right. This wolf was determined to kill me, and I was just as determined to stay alive.