Ice and Fire

Ice and Fire
Sofia's POV

I slammed my fist down on the table so hard that my water glass shattered to the floor.

"Sofia!" Rafe jumped up from his chair. "What's wrong?"

I stared at the broken glass and blood on my knuckles. The anger had come out of nowhere, hot and violent and completely out of control.

"I don't know," I whispered. "I was just thinking about Luca lying to me, and suddenly I wanted to break something."

"Let me see your hand," Rafe said gently.

"No." I pulled my hand away. "I'm fine."

But I wasn't fine. Ever since I discovered Luca's lies two days ago, my emotions had been all over the place. One minute I was sad, the next I was furious. I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't think straight.

"You're not fine," Nikos said from across the room.

I had forgotten he was there. Nikos was so quiet that sometimes he seemed to disappear into the shadows.

"Thanks for the helpful observation," I snapped.

"You're angry," Nikos continued, completely unbothered by my tone. "But anger without control is weakness."

"I'm not weak."

"Prove it."

Something in his voice made me look at him properly. Nikos was watching me with those ice-cold blue eyes, but there was something different about his expression.

"How?" I asked.

"Stop bleeding on the floor and learn to use your anger instead of letting it use you."

Rafe looked between us. "Nikos, maybe this isn't the best time—"

"This is the perfect time," Nikos interrupted. "She's about to explode. Better to teach her control now than clean up the mess later."

"What kind of control?" I asked.

"The kind that keeps you alive when everyone around you wants you dead."

Nikos walked over to me and studied my face like I was a puzzle he was trying to solve.

"You feel everything too much," he said. "Love, hate, fear, anger. It all shows on your face like words on a page."

"Is that bad?"

"It's dangerous. Emotions make you weak. They make you predictable."

I thought about how easily Luca had manipulated me by being charming. How Vincent had hurt me by using my love for my adoptive father against me.

"So what do I do?"

"You learn to be ice," Nikos said simply.

For the next hour, Nikos taught me things no one had ever told me before. He showed me how to make my face completely blank, hiding every thought and feeling. He taught me how to speak in a voice that gave nothing away. Most importantly, he showed me how to use other people's emotions against them while keeping mine locked up tight.

"Fear is a tool," Nikos explained. "But only if you're not afraid yourself."

"How do you stop being afraid?"

"You don't stop being afraid. You stop showing that you're afraid."

"What's the difference?"

"Everything."

Nikos made me practice hiding my emotions over and over. Every time I let anger or hurt or fear show on my face, he made me start again.

"Your enemies will use your feelings to destroy you," he said. "But if they can't read your emotions, they can't predict your moves."

"Is that how you survived so long?"

Something shifted in Nikos's eyes. For just a moment, the ice cracked and I saw something that looked like pain.

"I survived by becoming someone who couldn't be hurt," he said quietly. "Because people who don't care about anything can't lose anything."

"But you do care about things," I said. "You care about protecting me."

"Do I?"

The question hung in the air between us. I studied Nikos's face, trying to read him the way Luca had taught me. But Nikos was too good at hiding his thoughts.

"Yes," I said finally. "You do care. You just don't want anyone to know it."

"Why would I care about you?"

"Because you're not as cold as you pretend to be."

"Prove it."

I thought about everything I had observed about Nikos over the past weeks. The way he checked the locks twice before going to bed. How he always positioned himself between me and the door. The fact that he never relaxed, never let his guard down.

"You're afraid," I said suddenly.

"I don't get afraid."

"Not of dying. You're afraid of losing people you care about."

Nikos went completely still. "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Something happened to someone you loved," I continued, following my instincts. "Someone got hurt because you cared about them."

"Stop."

"That's why you act like you don't have feelings. Because feelings got someone killed."

"I said stop." Nikos's voice was deadly quiet.

But I couldn't stop. Everything was suddenly clear. "Who was it? Your family?"

Nikos moved so fast I didn't see it coming. One second I was standing by the table, the next I was pressed against the wall with his hand around my throat.

"Don't," he whispered, his face inches from mine. "Don't dig into things you don't understand."

I should have been scared. Nikos could kill me with one twist of his wrist. But instead, I felt something else.

I felt like I understood him.

"I'm sorry," I said softly. "I know what it's like to lose family."

"You know nothing."

"I know enough to see that you're not the monster you pretend to be."

Nikos stared at me for a long moment. Then he let go of my throat and stepped back.

"You want to learn control?" he asked. "Then learn this. Some doors should never be opened. Some questions should never be asked."

"Because they hurt too much?"

"Because the answers change you into someone you don't want to be."

I touched my throat where his hand had been. "Is that what happened to you?"

"Yes."

The simple answer hit me harder than any threat could have.

"But you're still here," I said. "You survived."

"Surviving isn't the same as living."

"Then why are you teaching me to be like you?"

"Because," Nikos said, "in this world, it's better to survive without feeling than to die with your heart on your sleeve."

The next day, I decided to test what Nikos had taught me.

There was a new guard named Tommy who had started working for us three days ago. Something about him bothered me, but I couldn't figure out what.

I found him alone in the kitchen, making coffee.

"Hi, Tommy," I said, keeping my voice friendly but empty of real emotion.

"Oh, hey." He looked nervous. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine." I studied his face carefully. "How do you like working here?"

"It's good. Easy job."

There it was. The tiny muscle twitch near his left eye that Luca had taught me to watch for.

Tommy was lying.

"Really?" I asked, moving closer. "It seems like dangerous work to me."

"Not really. Just standing around mostly."

Another lie. His hands were shaking slightly as he poured his coffee.

I decided to use what Nikos had taught me. Instead of being friendly like Luca would, I became ice.

"Tommy," I said, my voice completely flat. "Look at me."

He turned around, and I saw fear in his eyes.

"You're lying to me," I said simply.

"What? No, I'm not."

I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't let any emotion show on my face. Just stared at him with the cold, empty look Nikos had taught me.

"You're scared," I observed. "But not of this job. You're scared of me."

"That's crazy."

"You're sweating even though it's cold in here. Your hands are shaking. You can't look directly at me."

Tommy's face went pale.

"The question is," I continued in that same dead voice, "are you scared because you know what I'm capable of? Or because you're here to spy on me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

I took another step closer. Tommy backed against the counter.

"Someone sent you here," I said. "Someone who wants information about me and the men who protect me."

"Nobody sent me anywhere."

"Tommy." I let a tiny smile touch my lips, but kept it cold and sharp. "I can tell when people are lying. And right now, you're lying so badly it's almost insulting."

Tommy broke.

"Please," he whispered. "I needed the money. My sister is sick and I couldn't afford her medicine."

"Who sent you?"

"I don't know his real name. He just said he'd pay me fifty thousand dollars to watch you and report what I saw."

My blood turned to ice water. "What did you tell him?"

"Just basic stuff. How many guards there are, what the daily routine looks like."

"What else?"

"Nothing, I swear. I was supposed to call him tonight with an update."

"About what specifically?"

Tommy looked like he was about to cry. "He wanted to know which of the four men you trust the most. And when you're usually alone."

The world tilted sideways. Someone was planning to grab me, and they wanted to know when I'd be most vulnerable.

"What's his number?" I asked.

Tommy gave me the phone number with shaking hands.

"Thank you for your honesty," I said, my voice still deadly calm. "Now you're going to call him and tell him exactly what I want him to hear."