Chapter One Hundred And Sixty Eight

Chapter One Hundred And Sixty Eight
Deluna’s Pov

Did I just kill Travis? 
The question echoed in my mind as I stood in the middle of the battle, blood on the floor. The taste of blood and regret was in my mouth, and I could barely breathe. The silence after the fight was louder than all the noise before.
I staggered back, my limbs trembling as I tried to steady myself against a shattered column. Every heartbeat throbbed in my ears, a cruel metronome marking the passing of a moment I could never undo. The pain consumed me deeply; it was as though the very essence of my soul was being torn apart. I felt as if I might die from the weight of my own remorse.

For a long while, I recalled our fight. Travis, even in his final moments, had pressed me with questions that now haunted my every thought. His eyes, full of anguish and bitter disappointment, burned into me as though searing my skin. I could still hear his voice in the clamor of my memories: 

"Why did you do all this, Deluna?" he had demanded, his tone a mixture of sorrow and fury. His words had cut deeper than any sword. 

I had scoffed, a shaky laugh escaping my lips despite the gravity of our battle. "You know you don’t stand a chance against me," I had taunted. "A hundred-year-old vampire like me is no match for a twenty-year-old. Experience makes all the difference." I had tried to mask my inner turmoil with arrogance, but his next words shattered that mask.

"I trusted you, Deluna." His voice was low and bitter, and at that moment, I felt every promise I had broken weigh upon me. 

"A mistake on your part," I had snapped back, bitterness lacing my tone even as I tried to justify the actions that had led us here. 

"Are you truly happy with yourself?" he pressed, his words echoing in the blood-soaked silence between us. 

I had hesitated then, the truth surging up from the depths of my regret. Deep inside, I wasn’t happy. I’d always wanted to turn over a new leaf, to escape the darkness that had become my fate, but the guilt, the shame of all I had done, was too heavy to bear. I could not imagine living with the monster I had become. 

In the midst of our brutal combat, I had suddenly asked, almost tenderly, "Do you know what would truly make me happy?" I had frowned in confusion as he continued, "Killing you and destroying everything Lucian and Naomi hold dear." The shock of my words reverberated through him, and though I knew it was a cruel taunt, my voice carried a tragic sincerity that left me reeling. 

“Killing me?” he repeated in disbelief, his tone wavering between anger and desperate sorrow. I had merely nodded, unable to speak as the battle raged around us. 

Then, in a moment that still haunts me, he made a final, desperate plea: "Make me a promise, Deluna." 

What promise? I asked, my voice rough with fatigue and regret. 
"When you kill me, let everyone leave in peace," he had said. A laugh, bitter and harsh, escaped me, though I thought him likely joking, trying to weaken me with his words. But there was no humor there; the agony in his eyes spoke of an unbearable truth.

Travis had lowered his sword then, his eyes searching mine for something, a forgiveness, an understanding, and I believed, for one agonizing second, that he might not truly mean his words. I thought he was going to step back, that he would relent, and I dared to hope. But no, Travis had stayed his course. I had raised the silver sword I had crafted specifically for this purpose, a blade designed to end the life of a vampire like Lucian and him and though I wished I could turn back time, I could only watch as his fate unfolded.

"Did he really trust me to keep my word?" I had wondered in that crushing moment. "He was insane indeed," I whispered to myself, feeling the enormity of my betrayal, not just to him, but to every hope we had all once shared.

Now, as I stood amid the carnage, the raw anguish of his last moments still pulsing in my mind, I felt a numb despair wash over me. The scent of blood and the bitter smoke of spent magic hung heavy in the air. I could still see Naomi’s tear-streaked face as she cradled his limp body, her grief a living thing that twisted my heart.

I couldn’t bear the sight of it any longer. The cries, the weeping, the endless remorse, it was too much. I turned away from the broken forms and retreated into a darkened corridor, my mind racing with a torrent of conflicting emotions. I could hear Lucian’s furious shouts echoing behind me as he chased after me, his promises of death and retribution ringing in my ears.

"Deluna!" he roared as he caught up, his eyes blazing with fury and sorrow. "I swear, I will have your head!"

His words pierced the darkness, and for a moment, I could almost forget the shame that clung to me like a second skin.

Amid the noise of battle and sadness, I heard a voice. It was my own, full of sorrow. I remember looking into Travis's eyes, seeing hope there before it disappeared. I remember his gentle laugh, his warmth, and the promise he had made. And I knew that no victory in this endless war would ever bring him back.

"Travis," I murmured bitterly to myself, the sound barely audible above the chaos. What have I done? Is this the price of ambition? The cost of power? I tried to fight the feeling of hopelessness, but it crashed over me like a huge wave. 

My thoughts drifted to better days, when I thought there was hope for change. I had dreamed of leaving the darkness behind, of starting fresh where guilt didn't hold me back. I remembered the sound of friends laughing in a quiet room and the comforting touch of a kind hand on my shoulder. But those moments seemed as distant as a half-forgotten dream now.

"Why?" I asked aloud, though no one was there to answer. "Why did I let it go so far? Why did I not stop myself?" The questions tormented me as I recalled Travis’s bitter inquiry during our fight. His words showed me the truth I had tried to hide from.

For a brief moment in the chaos, I felt the heavy weight of my guilt. I remembered just before the last strike, a look of regret in Travis’s eyes, his final plea for peace, and then the silence after he died. It felt like his warmth left the world, leaving an emptiness I could never fix.
I dropped to my knees on the cold stone floor, my hands gripping the rough surface like I was trying to hold onto something real. Tears mixed with the blood on my hands as I sobbed. The noise of the battle in the distance felt far away, but to me, it was a loud reminder of my pain.

Lucian’s voice, full of strength and hurt, broke through my despair. "Deluna, you must answer for this," he bellowed from behind. I could hear the anger in his every word, the promise of retribution echoing through the ruined hall. For a moment, the world seemed to hold its breath, the only sounds of the pounding of my broken heart and the ragged, desperate cries of my own remorse.
I could hear the anger in his voice, full of the promise of revenge. For a moment, everything went still, and all I could hear was my own heart pounding and the desperate cries of regret.

I could almost hear Travis’s voice in my mind: "I trusted you…" His words hurt, a reminder of how I had broken his trust. At that moment, I understood that no matter how strong or clever I became, the guilt would always stay with me.

"Am I truly happy with myself?" I asked in the empty corridor, my voice trembling. The question echoed in my mind like a forgotten prayer asking for forgiveness for all I had done. But I knew the answer: I wasn’t forgiven. My thirst for revenge had cost me something much more important than winning.

As I stood, still shaking from the weight of my grief, I made a vow. I will never forget the price of this war. "I will carry this pain with me," I whispered, a promise to Travis and to the others who had been hurt. "I will never let this darkness claim another life without paying its price."

For a moment, I closed my eyes, letting the sharp smell of blood and regret fill my senses. The feeling of guilt was almost like a physical weight, heavy and suffocating. I remembered a time when I had hoped for a better future, when hope had been a small light in the dark. But now, that hope is buried under the pain and sorrow. 

I heard footsteps approaching, and Lucian’s anguished voice reached my ears again. "Deluna, where are you?" he cried, desperation lacing each word. I didn’t answer; I couldn’t face him yet, as his pain mirrored my own.

Instead, I turned away, letting the darkness of the ruined hall engulf me as I moved to a quiet corner. In the cold silence, memories flooded me, the laughter we once shared, the trust before the betrayal, and the haunting image of Travis’s fading smile. Each memory was a painful reminder that even the strongest can be undone by one moment of weakness.

"Deluna…" I whispered to the empty air, as if asking the woman I used to be. "Is there any redemption for me? Can I fix what I’ve done?" My voice cracked on the last word, and for a long moment, I stood there, swallowed by regret and sorrow.

In the distance, the clash of swords and cries of battle started again, a harsh reminder that the war wasn't over. I knew that Lucian and Naomi would soon demand answers, that they would seek to understand the monster I had become. And though a part of me longed to confess every sin and beg for forgiveness, I could only offer silence and a heavy heart.

"I will never forgive myself for this," I murmured to the darkness. "Travis… your sacrifice will haunt me until the end of my days. And I promise… I promise that I will make it right, even if it means paying the ultimate price... but not without dragging the souls of Lucian and Naomi to hell first."