24

Alice hadn’t stopped thinking about Adam all day. The memory of their time together was stuck on a loop in her mind, but the emotions it stirred were a confusing cocktail of shame and longing. Part of her felt pathetic—rubbish in bed, clumsy, and fumbling at even the most basic of sexual positions. It wasn’t how she’d imagined her first time going. She’d wanted it to be smooth and effortless, like the scenes she’d seen in movies, but reality had been awkward and far from cinematic.

Yet, another part of her couldn’t stop replaying the initial feeling of him entering her. The way her body had reacted, that electric connection—it was addicting. It left her craving more, her thoughts spiraling into fantasies that only deepened the ache. Sitting in class, she shifted uncomfortably in her seat, hyperaware of the heat pooling low in her stomach. If she got any hornier, she thought bitterly, she might end up like that kid who’d been caught masturbating in the toilets last term. The rumor mill had been merciless, and Alice had no intention of becoming the next cautionary tale.

By the time lunch ended, she was desperate for a distraction. In Art class, she joined Ed and Joseph, who were deep in conversation about Ed’s latest date.

“She’s perfect,” Ed gushed, his hands animated as he described her. “Into Warhammer and LARPing. Can you believe it? And she’s hot. Like, actually hot.”

Alice raised an eyebrow, leaning her chin on her hand. “Is Warhammer a cool thing now? Did I miss a memo? I thought it was strictly for nerds.”

“Oh, sweet summer child,” Joseph replied, feigning exasperation. “Nerds are the cool kids now. Haven’t you noticed? Dungeons & Dragons, comic cons, board game cafés—we’re taking over.”

“I must have been living under a rock,” Alice admitted with a small laugh.

Halfway through the lesson, Alek, their TA, wandered over to Alice’s station. He leaned in to inspect her work, his cologne faint but pleasant. His presence was always magnetic, and today was no exception.

“This is good,” he said, gesturing to her sketch. “Your composition is improving. I like the use of shadow.”

Alice felt her cheeks heat up, unable to suppress the smile creeping across her face. “Thanks.”

Alek smiled back, lingering for a moment before moving on. Over his shoulder, he added casually, “Maybe I’ll see you later.”

“Later?” Alice frowned, her heart skipping a beat.

“Oh, he means me,” Joseph interjected, breaking her train of thought. “He always pops by the Indigo Shark on Wednesdays. It’s his little tradition.”

Alice filed that away, her thoughts racing. She tried to sound casual as she asked, “What’s the Indigo Shark?”

Joseph shot her a knowing look. “It’s a bar. And no, you can’t just ‘coincidentally’ drop by. He’s a TA, Alice. And you’re a student. No.”

“But I could come to keep you company,” Alice said, batting her eyelashes playfully.

Joseph groaned, holding up a hand. “I can’t stop you from coming, but don’t even pretend you’re there for me.”

She smirked, pleased with herself. For the first time all day, she wasn’t obsessing over Adam. Sure, stalking her TA wasn’t exactly healthy behavior, but wasn’t there something to be said for following your heart? Besides, Alek had mentioned it in front of her. Maybe he wanted her to know where he’d be. That wasn’t an accident, was it?

After college, Alice ransacked her wardrobe, searching for the perfect outfit. It needed to grab Alek’s attention without screaming “look at me.” Eventually, she settled on tight black skinny jeans and a cropped jumper that showed just enough skin. As she rummaged through a pile of clothes, her fingers brushed against Adam’s hoodie. She paused, lifting it to her face and inhaling. It still smelled faintly of him—a mix of his cologne and something uniquely his.

Guilt bubbled up in her chest. Neither Adam nor Alek was her boyfriend, but holding the hoodie felt like betrayal. Was she two-timing them?

Her spiraling thoughts were interrupted by Jamie barging into her room. He barely glanced at her before demanding, “Where’s your hair straightening mist?”

Alice froze, the hoodie still clutched in her hands. Jamie’s gaze flicked to it, his eyebrows shooting up. “Whose is that?”

“Erm…” Alice stammered, her mind scrambling for an explanation. “No one’s. Just a guy from college. He lent it to me when I was cold.”

Jamie folded his arms, his expression skeptical. “And you’re hugging it because…?”

“It’s comfy?” she offered weakly, cursing her inability to lie convincingly.

Jamie smirked, shaking his head. “Nice subject change.” He pointed at his newly pink-dyed hair. “Like it? Some girls from the beauty college roped me into being their model. They’ve invited me to a party tonight—and another night out next week. Apparently, I’m a hot commodity.”

“Look at you, Mr. Popular,” Alice said, forcing a smile. A pang of jealousy hit her. She wasn’t exactly the life of the party. Invitations weren’t exactly flooding in for her.

When Jamie left, she stuffed the hoodie under a pile of clothes, grabbed her bag, and headed out. “I won’t be late,” she called to her mum on the way out the door.

The Indigo Shark was quiet when she arrived. Joseph spotted her immediately, rolling his eyes. “Oh, surprise, surprise! Look who decided to grace us with her presence.”

A couple of other patrons turned to look, and Alice felt her cheeks flush. She slid onto a stool and tried to play it cool. “I’ll have my usual,” she said confidently.

Joseph snorted. “Usual? Sweetie, you’ve been here, like, three times, and you’ve had something different every time.”

“Yeah, but it sounds cool. I want to be the kind of person who has a ‘usual,’” she said with a grin.

Joseph shook his head, laughing as he poured her a pint. She sipped at it, not enjoying the taste but knowing she couldn’t just sit there empty-handed. Every time the door swung open, her head snapped up.

When Alek finally arrived, her heart leaped. She tried to act nonchalant as he approached. “Hi,” he said warmly.

“Ah, one of your art students?” his friend asked, glancing at Alice.

“She is,” Alek confirmed with a smile. “One of the most talented I’ve ever had. Honestly, I’m jealous.”

Alice beamed, laughing nervously. “I’m not that good.”

Joseph leaned over, whispering conspiratorially, “Mystery solved.”

“Huh?” Alice asked, confused.

“He’s jealous of your potential,” Joseph said smugly. “That’s why he’s been bitchy to you before. He probably saw you as competition.”

Alice wrinkled her nose, unsure if she believed that. Was his recent kindness genuine, or was it something else? And if it was attraction… was that such a bad thing?

Her thoughts drifted back to Adam. She wasn’t sure what she wanted anymore—Alek, Adam, or something else entirely. But one thing was clear: her heart was pulling her in too many directions, and she wasn’t sure which one to follow.