Justin’s POV
How could Raven be so fucking heartless to me? I loved her, why would she turn her back on me like that? I begged her to just give me some time, and she flat-out refused. That asshole she is mated with needs to be taught a lesson too. I mean I went out of my way to tell Alpha Cole about what Reagan was planning, so he could take care of her, and stop her from doing it. I need Reagan taken care of, so I can be free again. I guess that I am going to have to try to get Reagan free from the cells. She is going to be pissed that I didn’t help her when they took her out of here. I thought that they would be progressing faster, I don't need this case to drag on. I am going to have to come up with something that shows her I cared about her, but I was trying to handle business at the time. Defend her, and her family, at least that is the line I am about to give them.
OH shit, her family. How much had they heard of what I said? All of it? None of it? Just coming back into the room to see me with my arms around her waist. I need to know, so I know how to twist that around too. Goddess, why do I still want Raven so badly? She is there in my mind all day, and even in my dreams. Ever since I stroked her face, I wanted to stroke every inch of her body. To worship it with my hands, and my tongue. To make her scream my name over and over again. It never went away. I mean I felt terrible at the gate, she did her side of it right. For a brief time, I felt intense pain. For about 30 minutes, then it went away, but I still had thoughts of Raven still running through my mind. She has had a hold of me since the moment I touched her.
I know that Luna Cassandra had caught some of it, but I don’t think that she will tell that I had announced it in front of so many others. She knows that if she does tell on me, things will be bad for everyone. I will make sure that she gets no peace again if she does. She was just mad and went to slap me, but what I said to her was the truth. Graham and Reagan knew it, as I had told them both. I wanted out of the contract, and they forced me back into it. I don’t think that Graham was going to be that mad about me spilling the beans, as he had pushed Raven in there and she had announced it too. That she was my mate, and not Reagan's. It should not come as a shock to them that the word is spreading around. They pushed it onto me, and I am going to be pushing back from now on.
Dad is still angry with me, but he knew I had been put in a position that I could not get out of. He knew how Graham, and Reagan, were. He had warned me about them, but I guess I thought I knew better than he did. I was an idiot, and I would be the first one to admit it. I had just mindlinked dad to ask if anyone had asked where I went last night. Thankfully, no one had yet. I told him to tell mom and my younger brother to tell anyone that asked that I was there with them. I do eat with them a few times a week, as I can’t stand the sight of Reagan most days. I found out that mom made meatloaf and mashed potatoes last night, so if I were asked, I would know what to say. They all know what is going on, and how I was tricked. They all have my back, and they are the only reason that I came back to the pack. I didn’t want them to be banished, or worse, killed.
My heart is aching in my chest as I went out to where I was told the cells were. I just wanted to see Reagan, and Graham, to see what they wanted me to do. They think that they are so fucking smart, but it is easy to trick a horny teenager. We are only focused on physical pleasure, not reading a boring contact. I learned from what they did to me. I will never again sign a contract with them or anyone without making sure I understand it. I was in a hurry the last time. Reagan was up in her room waiting on me, and I just gave a cursory glance at it. Didn’t see a problem and signed on the dotted line to go and spend some time with Reagan.
I have no idea what I ever saw in her, to begin with. Goddess, her only purpose for existing was to become Luna of this pack. For the money she receives to increase, so she can have all her dreams come true, oh yes, and to hurt Raven as much as she can. Well, looks like the joke is on Reagan now, because Raven is living her best life. I overheard some of the guys talking about how Raven took Cheryl down. Looked gorgeous doing it, and never broke a sweat. They all wanted to see if they could be her mate. Every freaking one of them. They made no bones about wanting her, and I almost punched one of them when he was talking about the kick raven apparently did on Cheryl. Apparently, Raven showed a lot of leg while doing it, and when his comment involved her legs being wrapped around him, I couldn’t contain my growl of anger. That is my mate he is disrespecting. He and his friends all took off as they knew I was pissed, and about to attack them.
Only for me to suddenly remember that I wasn’t her mate. That I am just the idiot who lost her because I was scared of the pack members coming after me too. I don’t know why, it was a well-known fact, that I was the strongest fighter, next to dad. If I had been thinking correctly I would have realized that I may have had to fight a few of them, but they would have figured out really quickly that they were going to continue to get their ass kicked if the bullying had continued. I would have just told them that we were going shopping with her, or out to lunch, and rejected our bond with the pack. We could have run away together. She would still be my mate, and bare my mark, instead of Reagan. It is eating me up inside that this happened. I wish I could control how I feel, and I bet the Goddess is getting a good laugh off of me on this one.
Alpha Cole had given me permission to come down to speak with Reagan, and he had an escort come with me. I can understand why they would want that. Graham and Reagan were not known for being trustworthy, and the rest of us were branded just like them. So I was not allowed to touch her, or close enough to touch the bars on her cell either. I was to stand in the circle in between their cells to speak, and then leave with my escort.
He stayed back at the bottom of the stairwell giving me a little privacy, but I knew that he had a visual on me. I stepped into the circle and saw that Reagan was asleep, of course, she was. Why should anything I do work out at any point? I start getting angry again, and it is because I know at this point that Raven is now marked by another man, and is no longer mine anymore. My heart feels like it is being squeezed inside my chest by an invisible hand, and the pain of it causes me to make a low sob. I thought I would be busted out for caring about Raven, when I heard Graham say, “I thought you didn’t care for her anymore?”
I am not stupid, I will play along with this. It should be my get-out-of-everything card. Plus, if I sleep with her when she gets home, I should be completely in her favor again. I stopped sleeping with her once I decided that I wanted to be with Raven. I had thought that Raven was going to wait for me, to be able to be with her. But I underestimated just how pissed off she was at me. She doesn’t want a damn thing to do with me, she is way passed pissed off. She didn’t even stop when I begged her to not mark that asshole. She knew I was there, and yet she did it anyway. Another whimper of pain escapes me, and Graham steps towards the cell bars to speak with me, and I turned to look at him.
His blue eyes, which are an exact match to Reagan’s look back at me unblinking. Graham seemed to want to look into my soul. He can go ahead and do it. My soul is in pain, and if he thinks it is because of Reagan's dumb ass, so be it. This whole family is driving me crazy, and I can’t get away from any of them. I had hope today. Hope that I could speak to Raven, to tell her how I feel, how much I love and miss her. To show her that I had changed by telling her dad important information. I thought that tonight, she might accept me back, and at least give me a kiss. Not for her to ignore me and mark another man right there in front of me. She told me I hurt her, and I did, but thousands of men have hurt women through the ages. Done stupid things, but still loved their women.
I guess Graham saw what he wanted in my eyes and then looked over at Reagan’s sleeping form and said, “She really messed up tonight, Justin. I don’t know what she did. She keeps lying to me and saying that she didn’t do anything. From the sounds of it, whatever it was, was not bad enough to interrupt her sleep from it. I know it will be bad, but according to her, she is guilty of nothing. I am glad you will support her as well because, with the council involved, this will go sideways fast. Cole said he has a video of whatever it is, we need to be able to downplay it, so we will have a meeting after we get out of here. By any chance, did she happen to tell you what it was that she did? I have some free time to try to think of a way to spin it, while I am doing nothing here. She is my only child and even though she can be a terrible handful, I just want what is best for her” Alpha Graham tells me, and I know he is upset by what happened tonight.
“She didn’t tell me either, I am sorry. I saw her being escorted out, but I was speaking with Brandon at the time, and he was being very ugly about Reagan, and something to do with a drink. I did see her, but I was trying to set him straight before I went running after Reagan. Once I got outside, because the door they used was locked, I lost her and didn’t know where they had taken her. I had been begging Raven to tell me where they put Reagan when you and Luna Cassandra came back into the room. I just found out about 15 minutes ago, where I needed to come to be able to visit you. I wish I knew what was going on. People are not telling me, and it worries me too, sir” I told him, and I think I did enough of a good job to escape any and all problems that would come with having been the one to warn Alpha Cole.
Alpha Cole and the council member still need me to tell them the additional information that I have on Silver Blade. They want as many charges as they can get, and for that, they need an inside man. I admit that the only reason I had originally helped them was to curry favor with Raven. She is marked now and has her second chance mate. She will be leaving to go to his pack soon, and I won’t be able to see her anymore. She will be his tonight, and my heart twists in pain again. I can barely stop the sound from escaping.
I just realize that since I still feel the connection, am I also going to feel it when they fully mate too? Is the Goddess that heartless to do that to me?
“How is it heartless, Justin? Didn’t she end up passing out in pain from you and Reagan having sex out there in the forest? Wasn’t that the reason she fell out of the tree?” my wolf, Lorne, asks me in mindlink.
“For the Goddess’s sake Lorne, I didn’t know she was there for her to be able to scent me. She didn’t feel it any of the time before because she didn’t know that I was her mate. If I had only known that she was out there, I would never have done it. If I knew then what I know now, I would have never slept with Reagan in the first place” I linked back, furious that he has mentioned it again. I already felt incredible guilt over it, to begin with. He knows as well as me that she could have been killed if she had landed wrong after she fell from the tree. The Goddess herself must have protected her.
“I can see that you are really upset by this turn of events, Justin. I will help you both out of whatever bind Reagan has put you in. I will see if I can’t get her to stop. I had already told her to stop, and I know you had too, that she needed to leave Raven alone. She will have to now. I don’t want to be getting into it with Black Adder too. We are already in the middle of it with Blood Walker. That is bad enough. Brandon will definitely not allow it, he is very possessive of her already. Reagan better hope that whatever she did to piss him off, will pass quickly” Alpha Graham said.
“What did you say? Did Brandon mark someone tonight? Who?” I heard Cheryl speak from her cell next to Reagan.
“Actually he allowed his mate to mark him first, I left to come and visit you, but I would assume that he marked her in return,” I told Cheryl. I deliberately omitted to tell her who. I was going to prolong her pain as long as I could because she had helped to cause this. If she were better at seducing people like Reagan was, she would have already taken Brandon out of the equation years ago. Then my sweet mate, Raven, would still be patiently waiting for me to be able to claim her.
“Who? Who is he mated to?” Cheryl almost whispers the question out. I can tell she is upset, but no more than I was.
“Raven,” I told her in a curt way, and she surprised us all by screaming out in anger. She is cursing Raven and says all sorts of vile things about her. When she started on the threats on Raven's life, I couldn’t contain my growl at her. Forgetting who I was standing next to, but again he misinterpreted my growl at Cheryl.
“Didn’t I just tell you both, that none of you need to mess with Raven ever again? Do not approach her, do not hurt her. We are done, there will be no more. I will kill you myself if I find out that you didn’t listen to me. We will all be lucky to get out of this mess with just a fine or something. We cannot afford any more charges levied against us. or incidents against us. No more!” Alpha Graham roars out the last bit and Reagan ends up waking up and turns over to see what is happening.
Before she can open her mouth to see what is happening I hear a voice from right behind me, I almost jumped because no one was there before, but my escort comes sliding past me and stops in front of Cheryl’s cell. “You are a real piece of work, and I see what I could have been condemned to now. I am glad to see your real feelings come through. I was going to give you a chance, despite what my father told me. After seeing how much you care for the mate that you chose for yourself, I have changed my mind. I, Joshua DeSavage, incoming Beta of the Blood Walker pack, reject you Cheryl Peters as my true mate” he tells her, and from the look on his face, he is almost too disgusted to look at her.
I see tears in Cheryl’s eyes as she sees him, and didn’t realize that he was there, or that she had a second chance mate. She is done for now, as she had rejected her first mate, and her second rejected her, but I can’t blame him, she is obsessed with another man. I feel like I need to help him out, I know the heartbreak he is going through while waiting on her to accept it. “Answer him! Now! Accept his rejection, right now” I yelled at her. She needs to just accept it, she caused it to begin with anyway by hurting her second-chance mate like that.
“I Cheryl Peters, daughter of the Gamma of the Silver Blade pack, accept your rejection, Joshua DeSavage,” Cheryl said, and I could tell he instantly felt better, but her pain increased. Seeing it play out in front of me I see it clearly now. Sometimes when the person who was in the wrong accepts the rejection, they seem to feel the brunt of the pain. Joshua looks at me and nods as he passes me. I can tell that he was giving me thanks for forcing her to stop stalling and trying to find a way to talk him into it. He walks back down the hallway to the stairs to stand again. I no longer want to be here with them. Seeing Reagan, and the rejection that just happened reminds me of the pain I bear for doing the same thing.
“Why are you here you traitor?” Reagan yells at me and reaches out of her cell to try to punch me. Great, my mate wants to go a round with me now. Goddess, please just make this night go by quicker. I am miserable here, and I just want to leave.
Changes being Made