Chapter Thirty-One

If Elliot had to join his life with a stranger’s for the next six months, there were worse strangers to look at. Hannah was an extraordinary natural beauty with long, dark red hair, a smattering of freckles across her nose and cheeks, and captivating green eyes. But she wasn’t for him. He wasn’t for her. And it would end tonight.

Kat had neither assured him she’d spoken to Ginger, nor had she done anything to fix the mess they’d all made. Elliot hadn’t acted alone in this, but he accepted responsibility for not following his heart where it had led him in the first place. However, when he was in the mood to share the blame, Michelle was his first target. But if the producers had stayed out of it, Cassie would have solved the problem, and everyone could have left relatively unscathed. But, no. They wanted her for next season. He no longer had any option but to quit.

Unfortunately, without his phone, he’d been unable to protect any money he’d saved, or contact a lawyer, but if they chose to take this all the way through court, they’d have a lot of explaining to do on their end as well. If the network didn’t want all their dirty laundry aired publicly, it would be in their best interest to settle out of court for a reasonable amount.

Elliot had no problem paying a price for his role in the mess, but he didn’t deserve complete financial ruin. He’d complete the show. He’d listen as The Panel extolled the virtues of Hannah Carter, and he’d nod his head and act like he was on board until the last possible moment.

And then he’d walk, like he should have done weeks ago after Ginger launched herself onto his lap in that limousine.

But first, on the morning of the finale, he had to sit through a session with Lavonne, a 'Matched' ritual, and act like he didn’t know what a rigged job it was.

Expecting the therapist to arrive with a full crew, Elliot answered the knock on the guesthouse door, dressed and clean-shaven. Kat stood alone on the front steps.

“You,” he said.

“Can we talk?”

He stepped away from the door, widening the opening to let her inside. She glanced around, like she was making sure they were alone, even up at the ceiling where, in the Hacienda, there were always cameras rolling. But as far as he’d always known, the guesthouse was completely private. Now he frowned, questioning everything again.

“I talked to Ginger.”

“And?”

She sighed, heavily. “She wouldn’t give me a lot. She’s still pretty upset about, you know, not having a job and stuff. We’re planning a girls’ weekend after all this. I might be able to get her to open up a little more.”

None of that was relevant. “Does she want me to finish the show?”

“We all want you to finish the show, Elliot. No one wants anyone else to get hurt.”

“You don’t seem to give a shit if Hannah does.”

“Hannah’s tougher than she looks,” Kat said. “You make her nervous, but she’ll be fine if…”

“If what?”

“If things don’t work out for you after the finale.”

“What about Ginger?” he asked. “How are things going to work between us after the finale?”

“What do you mean?”

“You made it sound like you’d figure something out—”

“Yeah. After the finale.” Kat made a sweeping gesture toward the main house. “Do you have any idea how busy I’ve been the last week? Between visiting Hannah’s hometown and Daisy’s? Cutting the packages for the finale? Getting the Hacienda ready after we were gone for two weeks? I haven’t had time to come up for air.”

“You did talk to her, didn’t you?” Elliot didn’t believe a word these people said anymore.

But her expression was completely sincere when she nodded and said, “I did. I didn’t get very far.”

“She’ll never want to see me again after this.” He sat down on the edge of the bed, landing heavily.

“You know Ginger. She’s not a big fan of strong feelings. I think her first instinct is always going to be to put her guard up. But if you go through with this, I swear to God, I’ll keep working on her. It might take some time, and honestly, some distance from the show.”

It wasn’t an unreasonable request. But it also wasn’t enough.

He wasn’t going to spend the next six months waiting for Kat to solve a problem he could solve by walking away. But he also didn’t want to get anyone else in trouble or fired. If Kat got him to the finale, and he went through the motions of filming the entire episode, her job should be safe. After all, no one could have expected her or Matt or anyone to control a star who’d proven himself time and time again to be volatile and unpredictable. Her job should be spared, and Elliot would bear the consequences.

“What time do I need to be ready?”

“Filming starts at four. I’ll need you up at the main house by three.”

“Any chance I could have my phone back?”

“Just get through tonight, Elliot.”

If she hadn’t had a job interview, Ginger would have stayed in bed all day, hiding from the world and wallowing in the depressing knowledge that yesterday Elliot picked his future wife.

Instead, she was combatting memories of him that spread throughout her entire house, even the bathroom where she was trying to make herself look presentable for a perfect stranger.

She would have to move. ASAP. After two weeks of being home, the images of Elliot in her house had faded not one bit. If anything, he’d become a ghost-like presence—performing actions he’d never performed there before. She even thought he’d made the bed one day before she found the note her cleaning service had left while she was at the grocery store.

Her thoughts were getting out of hand. So much so, she’d signed up on three dating websites and nightly had been on the hunt for a man whom she could see herself falling for the way she’d stupidly gone and fallen for Elliot.

No luck so far. Other men still paled in comparison, but maybe it was too soon. Surely one day she’d stop holding everyone else up to Elliot Hale’s impossible standard of sexy beautiful. He was out there—the right one for her. She would keep looking and remember never to settle. It wasn’t like there was a clock somewhere inside her ticking. She’d wait until it seemed like a better idea.

Locating her keys in her bag, she took them out along with her sunglasses. Her phone rang from the counter, which was good, because she’d been about to walk out of the house without it.

Kat again. She’d instituted daily check-ins.

“I’m fine,” Ginger answered. “I have an interview.”

“Oh good. Where at?”

“HBO.”

“Oh my God!”

“Yeah—so…”

Kat interrupted. “Well, I was calling to check in, but I also need a huge favor.”

Ginger made a face. “What?”

“Elliot’s phone. I looked all through the offices. You still have it?”

She took a deep breath, pulling deeply on the air of her small living room to give her the strength to consider the answer to that question. “Yes.”

“Well…before we filmed the finale last night, he asked me about it, and…well…”

“Is he still in town?” Ginger wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the answer.

“Not for long, so…can you drop it by the Hacienda? After your interview, I mean.”

“He’s not still in the guesthouse, is he?”

“No! Of course not. Ginger, I would never… We’re cleaning up, getting things squared away. Matt was planning to take Elliot to the airport from his hotel later, and he’ll get the phone back to him. I’d leave and come grab it from you, but it sounds like you’re on the way out the door.”

Fuck it. “I can bring it.” The Hacienda was the last place in the world she wanted to be, but she remembered how hectic the day after the season ended could be. So many moving parts to manage. Besides, her favorite Yeti was still in the control room.

Kat sighed with obvious relief. “What time do you think?”

“Depends on the interview and traffic. Five? Is that too late?”

“It’s cutting it close, but we’ll make it work. Thanks, Ginj. See you then. Dress nice, we’ll go grab drinks after.”

That was an offer she couldn’t refuse. “Sounds good.”

“Good luck with your interview! I’ll give you an amazing reference!”

Ginger hung up and considered her outfit—whether it was “going out for drinks” worthy. It read more uptight—a plain white blouse and wide-legged black slacks—but it wasn’t hideous. The pants were expensive. Anyway, it wasn’t like she was planning some big hookup at a bar.

Stopping by her desk, she opened the drawer and pulled out Elliot’s iPhone, smirking briefly at the memory of his reaction when she’d presented him with his burner three months ago. But her smile faded fast as her gaze fell on his Swiss Army knife.

Such bad luck. She’d tried to tell him hadn’t she?

She picked it up and put in into her bag along with his phone.

Letting go of him still hurt, but she was moving on, like he was. She was no closer to winning an Emmy, but she’d stopped regretting everything that had happened between them. It had been worth it. Worth it to discover her job wasn’t what defined her. It was worth it to let her guard down for once. And it was worth it to fall in love, even if it had been an impossible fantasy. It was nice to know things like that happened, even if they weren’t always meant to last.

Elliot sat before The Panel as a compilation of his greatest hits with Hannah played on the large screen above their heads. It was harder to watch than he expected. He barely remembered any of the moments the camera had captured, but if anyone bothered to ask, he could have described with scary accuracy where Ginger had been standing on each of the shoots, what she’d said to him beforehand, and the questions she’d asked in the interviews she’d filmed with him afterward. Ginger was everywhere in those locations, but absent from the screen, from his options, his life.

As the montage came to an end, he shifted his attention to The Panel.

Lavonne slid her glasses down her nose. “I’ve always enjoyed the way you two work together in the challenges. You have a genuine affection for one another.”

Elliot swallowed the lump forming in his throat. He was unable to speak. He was trying to pick his moment to stand up and walk out, not wanting it to be even a fraction as dramatic as Jenna’s last stand in Paris.

His mother spoke up. “We know from talking with Hannah she’s ready to have children right away. How do you feel about that?”

Running his palms down the arms of his chair, the nervous energy inside him swirled, transforming itself into dread. “You know I want kids.”

“Are you able to see yourself starting a family soon though?” Michelle asked. He’d tried to avoid her probing stare since he walked into the room, but he found himself eye-to-eye with it then. It was as intrusive as expected.

“Whatever,” he muttered.

“Look,” Anna piped up. “We’re here trying to decide between two incredible women—both of whom I can absolutely see you with. Hannah and Daisy. I want to hear from you what you think is missing with Hannah first, and Daisy second.”

A beautiful photograph of Hannah appeared on the screen. If he’d seen her at a party a year ago—before Ginger, before Jenna—he probably would have turned over tables to get to her. They wouldn’t have talked much. He would have been on a mission to get her into bed. But he knew himself better now.

“I think I make her nervous in a way I don’t know how to fix.”

“Do you think counseling would help iron out some of the trust issues in your relationship?”

“I guess it could,” Elliot said to Lavonne. But he would have to want it to. The desire for anything more with Hannah didn’t exist. They’d gone as far as he wanted to go.

“From what Hannah’s told us, it sounds like you’re exactly right. She is reluctant to trust, especially in an environment like this. However, we have discussed, and we do feel that once she’s more sure about your relationship, she’d be much more willing to open up. Do you feel that’s too little, too late?”

“What makes you think she could be the one? Maybe that’s a better question.”

Anna got that dreamy look in her eyes Elliot had grown to dread. “She’s been a bit of a dark horse, don’t you think? I like the fact that she’s made it this far. I had no idea you’d even taken the time to notice her. Our focus has been on other things, but when you saved her last week, I was glad. You and Daisy sometimes act like two pals, you know? But you’re sweet with Hannah.”

Reticent, Elliot itched to rise from his seat. Hannah would be hurt. He’d be hurting one more person in this process. First Cassie, then Ginger, Jenna—now Daisy and Hannah. If there were a worse man in the world, Elliot hoped he never had to meet him.

The slide switched, changing the image in front of him. A side-by-side of Daisy and Hannah. The images of the two of them smiling, staring back at him, hit Elliot with the force of a blunt object. He couldn’t breathe. “I need a minute.” Standing abruptly, he headed for the door.

Behind him, the murmur of The Panel filled the sudden silence following his departure. Kat caught up with him as he made his way toward the nearest exit.

“I said I needed a minute,” he snapped, even as Kat closed in. He’d gotten as far as the main living area, within feet of the patio door.

“And I need to make sure you stay on the grounds.”

“I can’t do this!” he exploded. The words had been on the tip of his tongue for days, but he couldn’t hold them in anymore. He roared them now—loud enough for someone to finally hear him. “So I guess I’m fucked, right? I won’t put either one of those women through a lie for a goddamn television show. I can’t do that.”

“Well, I can’t have you walking out right now, Elliot. Look. You’re not the first person to freak out at this point. Brandon’s freak-out was legendary. And Jenna—oh my God, she was a mess on her decision day. She was about to walk, too.”

“Yeah, and look what happened to her.”

“Do you want a drink? Let’s have a drink.”

Kat walked into the kitchen and helped herself to the liquor cabinet, pouring a dark whiskey into two glasses and handing one over to him. She checked her watch and glanced at the patio door.

Elliot hated whiskey, but he’d deal. He downed the syrupy liquid all in one swallow and held his glass out for another. “I’m gonna walk, Kat.”

“You’re ready to ruin your life for a woman who left you in Paris?”

“It’s not just for her. It’s for Daisy and Hannah. I can’t do this. I won’t lead either one of them on—”

“You signed a contract.” Her second pour was more generous. “Just sip it,” she suggested. “Either way this ends up, you still have to go back on camera.”

The delayed ripple effect of the alcohol sent a shiver down his spine. It worked to take the edge off the moment, giving him the necessary courage. “It’s not like no one’s ever walked away from a reality show before.”

Kat gave him a warning look. “No one’s ever walked away from this one. I’ll be honest with you, Elliot. I don’t know what Marlon’s gonna do, not to mention the people over him. We wanted you. Specifically.”

Elliot set the shot glass down. The sound of glass hitting marble grated. Life as he knew it was about to be over, but all he could think was fuck it. It hadn’t been that great anyway. “I know.”

“Do you realize how much went into selecting the women who ended up getting a chance to be with you?”

“I’m sure it was a lot of time and a lot of effort.”

“And money, Elliot. It was a shit ton of money. More than you have, frankly.”

“So I’ll go broke.” He wished the idea of that didn’t bother him so much. He wished he came from a family with deep pockets where his decisions—bad or good—didn’t make much of a difference to his bottom line. But they didn’t put people on this show who had nothing to lose. Maybe that was another reason why it worked. Because the second you walked on set you were handcuffed to a happy ending.

“You don’t still think you’ve got a chance with Ginger, do you?”

He stared into his drink. “It doesn’t matter. All that matters is I love her. I came here specifically not to fall for someone, and it’s exactly what I did. I guess I wasn’t ready to be practical. I still want to have it all, and I fucked up. So I’ll pay the price, but I’m not gonna drag some other woman into it. I could never be with either of them. Not the way they deserve.”

Kat heaved a long-suffering sigh. “I guess it’s time to tell The Panel. That you dragged them all into this for nothing.”

“Thanks for the support, Kat. Again.”

She took a step closer to him, meeting his eyes. Her tone was softer, but her words remained on brand. “I appreciate that you love my friend. I think you’re stupid, but I respect you for following your heart or whatever. Obviously, I can’t get the last three months of my life back, but God forbid you do something that goes against your feelings.”

He ignored her commentary, finishing his second drink. It wouldn’t be enough to make him slur his words, but it was enough to give him the balls to do what he needed to do: walk away and pay the price.

It was also enough to make the door to The Panel’s room open with a resounding bang. That was an accident though. “Sorry,” he mumbled as he walked back to his seat.

Lavonne picked up her pen. “Are you all right, Elliot?”

“I have something to say.”

His mother cleared her throat, waving a hand to get his attention. “You’ve had your moment, honey, I’d like to say something now.”

He opened his mouth to speak, determined to maintain his thunder, but she cut him off.

“You came here, with us, asking for help to find the future you’ve been dreaming of.”

“It’s how the show works, Mom.”

She shrugged off his bitter tone. “For weeks you’ve alternately thrown yourself into this and resisted it with everything you’ve got. We wanted you to find love. Not just a partner, not just a cosigner on a home loan—but a love to carry you through the ups and downs of a life lived to its fullest. We think you deserve that.”

“Can I talk?”

“Not yet—”

“Mom, I can’t do this.”

She blinked, a slight frown on her face.

Anna sat straighter, reaching over to put a hand on their mother’s, quieting her from saying what she’d already taken a breath to say. Instead, Michelle spoke. “We know, Elliot. That’s why we have one more woman we’d like you to consider.”

No way. No way they were bringing Jenna back after everything that went down in Paris. They couldn’t possibly do this to him. Make him break one more heart with his inability to envision a future with anyone but the one who got away. “Please don’t do this, Michelle.”

Hannah’s face disappeared from the screen behind them. Momentary blackness took its place as he steeled himself for another glance into Jenna’s bright blue eyes. But it wasn’t Jenna’s face that appeared.

Dark almond eyes, broad, smooth cheeks, and a ponytail that wouldn’t give up.

“Ginger,” he whispered, his breath rushing out of him as his former producer’s image filled the screen, a candid shot of her smiling near the Hacienda’s pool, maybe looking up at Jamie, or Kat.

The photo shifted, zooming out, and there Elliot was, in that stupid coral shirt, staring down at her adorably grinning face with a mix of heated desire and pure affection in his eyes.

The alcohol took a wicked turn in his stomach as nerves threatened to bring it all back up his throat. “What is this?”

“We’d like you to watch a piece the producers put together.”