11. Not everything is in color

I sat at a table for four, with the exception there were only two of us.

Hector had joined me early in the morning after Darcy left for the night. Our conversation was cut short.

“You’ve been quiet. Is something bothering you?” Hector sips on his blood, eyes trained on me. “I can help you.” His dashing smile sets my nerves at ease.

Instead of answering, I stand, juice glass in hand. His eyes followed me as I reach the opened glass door and leaned, facing the garden down below I still hadn’t visited.

“Mi Princesa, there’s nothing we won’t answer for you. Although it was sudden, we worry for you, so ask anything. I will do my best to answer your questions.”

I arch a brow.

“Then tell me, how did I become patient zero, according to Darcy? If I am that, why do I have no recollection?” I glance over my shoulder. There it is again. That damn look. “See, no answer. You all are liars.”

My eyes are back on the garden when I hear the scratching of a chair on the floor. Hector is by my side the moment I look behind me.

“There’s only one person who can answer that.” I arch a brow. “There are some things I can answer, Yophiel. Some questions are not for me, but for others, like your father.”

My jaw clenches, anger flaring. I turn my face away, count to ten, then I lean against the cool glass.

“Then answer me this. Why didn’t I have memories of ever meeting you?”

“Callisto sealed them. It wouldn’t do you any good if you knew all of this before we even completed our plan. The day you got sent to the lab. That day, you only met Callisto, then Darcy who was in charge of the lab that time, then Seth, then me and last Adonis. You saw it in your memories.

“It wasn’t like the same day, but through the entire process of you being there, we visited you. How long do you think you were there in the hospital?”

The question throws me off guard.

Now that he mentions it. The time spent in the hospital, according to my memories and what everyone, especially my father, said, was eight months. Then I was brought home, making it a year. Then this happened…

“It wasn’t a year, was it?”

Hector has that strange look on his face, the one I’m not sure how to define. I can’t tell what he is thinking. It annoys me.

According to my observation, they were emotionless creatures. Yet, the knowledge of them feeling those emotions through my blood makes me question many things.

I take a sip of my juice to avoid answering. I suspect he was somehow testing me, stirring my mind.

“The time spent in the lab was something your father decided to hide. The reason? You should have never known of us, not until fully turned. You want to know more about that, then ask Darcy. I’m sure he would gladly answer that.”

“Someone said my name?” Darcy’s voice breaks the uncomfortable air around us.

I turn, forcing a smile as the door behind him shuts.

“What is my Yophiel curious about today?” he takes a seat, yanks Hector’s cup and sips on it. The blood smearing on his lips.

I stare at them before I take my own seat. Am I supposed to just spend my day here with them?

“Mi Princesa wishes to know the reason why she doesn’t remember her time in the lab. Her memories, you know.” Darcy’s eyes dart between Hector and me. That sharp smile was back on his slender face.

I rub the back of my neck, an itch burning. They notice and Darcy assures me I will get used to the itch on my neck. I still don’t understand how he knows.

I don’t understand many things.

“Okay, let’s end this part,” Darcy leans, arms crossed over his chest. “The reason you have no memories was Callisto sealing them.”

“I know.”

“Then that means you won’t know the actual time spent in the lab when you arrived. During that time, you were fighting for your life, Yophiel. The estate that you arrived on was for you to have been dead. Your skin was falling, your bones were visible, you were bleeding and hurting.” He lifts a shoulder. “Dead was the way you should have arrived, but you didn’t, because?”

“Of the mutation?” I respond.

“Well yes, call it that. How did you come to have it, easy, you were not born like normal babies are born?”

I stilled. My heart is racing.

He is moving quickly to my side.

I hate it. I don’t want him to be close.

“Yophiel, breathe,” Darcy offers, his hand moving closer to my face. “I need you to breathe.”

I push down the urge and turn my head away. I can feel Adonis close, the itch burning stronger on my neck.

The least I want is him here right now. We might have spent the night all together here in my room when they were telling me the truth, but the last thing I want is them all again here.

I step away from the table despite Darcy insisting for me to sit back down.

The air shifts behind me, then I feel his cold and firm hold on my shoulders.

When we first met, I thought about how striking his eyes were, but now I know it wasn’t only that that made me look at him. It was his demeanor, the way he carried himself.

“Why are you here?” Hector asks, looking fiercely at Adonis.

I am surrounded by men, but I’m just as alone as I was back then.

I moved away from him, from all of them.

“What did you do?” Adonis faces the others.

“What do you care?” Hector snarls, his fangs long, sharp, and dangerous. “Go back. This has nothing to do with you.”

The air drops. If I were anyone else, I would surely cut this crap and put them in their rightful places, but it won’t do me good to even try with Adonis close to me.

“This is a lie.” I speak the words. A breathless whisper as they all turn their eyes on me. “You are all liars.”

“We may be monsters, but liars we are not.” Adonis sharp voice cuts through the air. Charging with anger. “Call them whatever you want, but don’t you dare call me a liar when all I’ve done is tolerate you. I already told you once. I won’t hesitate when it comes to you. Desire to kill you is what I want most. So don’t tempt me, Yophiel.”

Darcy is blocking my view from Adonis’ stony gaze.

“Enough.” Darcy orders. But it won’t solve the problem.

“Leave us,” I say, making them all look at me as if I just went crazy.

“Princesa—”

“Go,” I retorted. “You two go. I want a word with Lord Adonis.”

They hesitated, but forced themselves somehow to obey my request, which I found intriguing. Once the doors closed, Adonis relaxed.

I exhale slowly.

This right here was my chance to end things or find a solution to my turmoil. I might annoy him, since I am not his fan, but there was one thing I found quite interesting and just now, I could confirm it.

“You felt my emotions.” It wasn’t a question.

Adonis snare confirmed my suspicions.

“The itch on my neck tells me you are close, and the closer you get the more, I feel you. Yet you came because you felt the shift of my emotions when Darcy uttered the words.” I smiled. “Of all of them, you feel my emotions the most. No matter what they are, you feel them like your own and that’s bothering you.”

I’m over the table before I can take my next breath. His claws around my neck that is still bandaged. His fangs sharp close to my lips and his eyes a darkness like no other I’ve seen.

“Silence!”

“I won’t.” My voice was steady with courage. I got him just where I wanted. “You are angry because you feel what I feel. My emotions, my pain…”

“No,” he pants, chest heaving as if he was breathing the air. “I can’t feel your pain, but I can feel your emotions. Sadness, anger, hurt, happiness…”

I stared.

Adonis grip loosened, then he leaned his face on my chest.

“I hate it because you are a mess. You are everywhere. Calling me, beckoning me to care for you when I have no interest. I hate you, loath you, Drusilla. You are the woman I hate the most, and I hate myself for feeling this way.”

If stunned could be called what I felt, then that’s how I felt right this moment. Adonis Billiot was being honest. Was showing me who he was. The wall he was trying so hard to keep up crumbled in an instant.

With ease, his hands slid down from my neck until they snaked around my waist, pulling me closer to his face. His touch light, as if worried I would break under him.

His breath tickled against my skin, and I shiver. “Then there’s no need for you to want me. Just leave and don’t come close to me.”

As if my words were a punch, he steps back, a scowl on his handsome face.

“You think I haven’t done that already? I’ve been denying this need, this craving. This desire, but I can’t. It’s not that easy, Drusilla.”

My name on his lips sends a delicious shiver down my body until my legs feel jelly. Just like that, every thought, every memory, turns into mist in my head. I reach and tug his shirt. I need something from him and I need it now.

I abandon the line of thinking and dig my hands into his hair, pulling him closer to me. He flinches, the tiniest of movements, one I would miss if he hadn’t shifted between my legs.

When Adonis speaks, it’s with an indifferent tone. “Stop.”

I glare. “Yes, you are right, we should.”

My hands let go. I pushed him away and get down from the table.

I blink, and he’s in front of me. This close, he seems fearsome. His all-black suit shows his great body.

He stares at me with something akin to pain. “Why are you doing this to me?”

“I’m not doing anything to you. Don’t you see I let go?” I feel this rage and annoyance inside me.

His brows pull together. “Now it’s my fault?”

“Am I blaming you? You said you hate me, then there I let go of whatever unnecessary and stupid thought I had. So get lost now.”

“I don’t like you.” He voices.

“The feeling is mutual, pal.”

“But you are feeling something different…” That hangs between us.

Angry, I turned to look at him.

“You don’t know a thing!”

Adonis arm whips out and wraps around my waist. It’s too late. He shifts our bodies and I jerk back as his lips close on mine.

He tenses against me.

“Let. Me. Go!”

There’s a scoff, and then slowly, he releases me. “Fuck you.”

I bite down hard on my lip, but the pain only makes me tear up. He pushes past me.

He is not wrong. My emotions are all over the place right now. But that doesn’t mean I don’t feel the sadness of being hated by him.

***

The thought I possibly wasn’t human has me wondering if my father was capable of such things. If the lies that had piled up were just things placed in my imagination. My childhood was there, in photos, in memories, so there was a chance I was human. Not like Hector or Darcy affirm.

There had to be some mistakes, some unmistakable errors in all this. A lie let’s call it. One that tugged on the darkest corner of my mind.

Between all these ‘Truths’ a lie was hidden and one of them wasn’t telling me. It could be Callisto as the head of the bloodlines, but it could as well be Darcy as the head of the lab, the chief engineer, the scientist.

I stared at the garden, neat and extravagant. All kinds of trees and flowers covered the place. Callisto had created this safe haven for me while the rest of the world rot. No doubt everything he did was because of me. The world he so proudly says he created for my benefit.

A sour thought crosses my mind before I push myself away from the rails and head back into the room.

So many thoughts replayed in my mind. A few from Darcy and Adonis. Not that I welcomed him, especially after what transpired between us a few hours back.

I still felt the way he touched me, his hands careful with my body.

With a sigh, I sit back on my desk, placing both my arms crossed in front of me to rest. I stared at the computer screen, a notification beeping slowly on the corner.

That caught my attention, so I sat up. My finger clicking on the area where the red dot was. It was news from the compounds.

Then a memory flashed through my mind. Without a second thought, I flee the room, searching for one hateful individual.

It took me more than twenty minutes to finally find him standing at the end of the garden. The only place I haven’t visited still.

The itch on my neck is an indication he knows.

Slow, but oh so slowly, he turns. Sharp emerald eyes lock with mine. “We have to talk.”

At least a bit of satisfaction is usually felt, but right now I felt awkward. We both did.

“I thought you were clear enough earlier, telling me to fuck off.”

“I recall you saying that rudely.” I arched a brow, arms crossed and leaned on the wall. “I need a favor.”

That picks his interest.

“I need to meet my father.” The words are out before I can count my next breath.

He continues to stand still. His handsome face contemplating my words. “He is not alive.”

“He is.” Don’t take me for stupid Adonis Billiot. “Callisto once told me my parents were safe. And you know that, so don’t lie.”

All that is true. My parents being alive was true, but still something told me this wouldn’t be easy.

“Why should I help you?”

Damn it.

“They’re in your compound, or somewhere you know.”

Adonis lifts his hand. The air dropping. “I can’t and won’t help you with that. I have no obligation to.”

I bit my lip.

Yes, he had no obligation, and yes, it was stupid of me to ask for his help. But they were in his compound. That’s where Callisto sent them. And they were alive. No one else would be able to help, since he was the owner and the one in charge of his compound. As the head of it, he would somehow need to…

“Let’s bargain,” I say.

He takes a step forward, and some instinct has me backing up. Adonis stalks closer. Something like static clashes in the air I’m breathing. It’s faint, but strong enough to stir my emotions.

“Adonis.”

My hands find his chest as he blurs before me. And yet I can’t stop from sliding my hands down his broad body.

It was hard, cold, and there was no heart.

His hands brush my hips, and my back is against the door of the room.

“You can’t bargain with the devil unless you are seeking a true hell. If I were you, I would be careful with words, or they would be the end for you.”

A shaky breath leaves my lips.

He pins me harder, his body pressing hard against me.

I feel the heat of my cheeks and ears before his lips. Adonis nips at my bottom lip. “I don’t fucking understand you.” His claws dig into my waist as he slowly lifts me up against the door.

My legs dangle awkwardly.

A shudder works its way through my body. “Damn you.”

I watch him, eyes wide, and then he kisses me. Spearing at me with his tongue savagely. Claiming me.

My head slams against the door with a moan. I cling to him, wrapping my legs around his waist, loving his hands all over my body. His lips taking me as if I was his air.

I can’t be sure what he is thinking, but I know what I am thinking right now and it’s not something good.

That same thought from before, that small need that tugs inside me, has me on the verge of begging him.

My hands shake as they find his hair. The silkiness driving me crazy.

“Yes.”

I blink.

I stay perfectly still as he leans back. His eyes gleaming that emerald, green that captivated me.

“What?” I ask breathlessly.

“Yes, let’s bargain.” I hold his gaze. He just agreed? “Spend a night with me, alone, in my room, and I should agree to take you to your parents.”

A bolt of heat goes through me when I remember his awful words. All the sparks I felt died and Adonis felt it the shift inside me.

I shouldn’t let my emotions control me. This was a bargain I had offered at first. Now I had to deal with it.

He resents me; I know. Loathes me, so why even offer that as a bargain?

“No.” My voice is firm, “you said you hated my looks, loath me. That I’m repugnant to your eyes.”

I couldn’t feel sadness or ache, only anger.

He startled, then backed off, letting me down.

His eyes flash black and he reaches for my neck. He barely made it halfway when I’m slapping it hard. The sound echoing through the silent room.

I pushed the pain away and focused on my words.

“You think I would easily say yes? That I would give in to your sick offers? I may be naïve, Adonis, but your words will always remain in my mind. And nothing, hear me well, nothing, will make me see you other than a monster. A repugnant one, I loathe.” My words hanging in the air. “I don’t even know why I even seek you. The worst mistake.”

Likely, he is aware of what this means. That no matter what happens afterwards, I will never accept him. That’s much is clear between us now.

With one full stare at him, I throw the door open, letting it hit the wall as I strode down the stairs and out of his way.

***

One last breath and I will feel better. All the rage and fury I felt has calmed down once I was out of his reach.

I seriously was stupid, if not an idiot. Dealing with him, making that stupid offer or bargaining was the worst decision. My life was already a mess to add another one to the pile.

In this living nightmare, I had only one choice: escape and never give in to their desires or requests. Why? Because I had a moment of weakness when he touched me.

The same feeling I had with Callisto when he held me. It was like an annoying itch, bothersome yet fulfilling in a way I was starting to hate.

I took a seat and logged into the computer. The screen comes to life as another two notifications pop out. One in particular caught my attention.

Humans take back the east coast. The bloodlines ready for war.

I blink, rereading again the first two lines.

Humans have taken back the east coast, meaning they found a way to fight the bloodlines?

As astounding as that sounds, something didn’t fit well. Likely was my imagination.

A knock from the door makes me jump on my seat. “Who is it?” I called.

“Callisto. Phi, may I come in?” My hands are slamming the computer shut before he even steps into my room. His steps halt as he takes in what I’m doing. “You were busy?”

I can’t stop the nervous laugh. Callisto arches a brow.

Pushing the thought out of my nervous head, I clear my throat, moving around the desk. “Why are you here?”

He supposedly was out. Visiting one of the compounds according to what Hector told me earlier.

“Adonis told me what you requested.”

“What exactly?” I study his face. I don’t miss the twitch on his jaw.

When I think of his miserable life, the suffering, our connection. I hope it was all just some awful dream. That I was stuck in a coma and once I wake this will be gone.

I ignore the twinge in my chest.

“If you wished to meet your father, you could have asked me. I know Adonis is a damn bastard. There was no need for you to deal with someone like him.”

Okay, unexpected answer.

“He is the leader of that compound—”

“And I’m the head of the bloodlines. I rule over their compounds even if they don’t like it. It’s my duty as head and leader to keep things in check. You can come to me and trust me with something like this.”

I brace myself for my next words. “Yet I can’t trust you…”

“What did you say?” Callisto whispers. His brows furrow, a scowl taking over his pristine face. “I am sure you once said you trusted me, that I trusted you. Care to explain how that doesn’t count now?”

I square my shoulders. My hands reach the strap and tug until the entire bandage slips off my neck.

He surveys me.

“This is enough to answer your question.” I lift my hand and touch the area where the missing chunk is. “All the explanation you need is here. Now tell me, how am I supposed to trust you when you lost my trust the moment you hurt me?”

I can’t tell how grave the wound looks without a mirror.

I start to turn when I decide not to. There was nothing to see. It would only be another deception like the many others I already have.

“Trust is earned, Callisto, but once lost, you can’t recover it back. Not the same way it once was. So don’t expect me to fall back that easily. I’m not a piece of your chess board nor am I one of your subjects. I am a human being, one that still has her freedom.”

There’s a beat of silence.

“Yes, you are right.” He turns and stops at the door. I take a slow breath and let it out. “You are not allowed to go out of this room until I say otherwise.”

My eyes widened.

I ran to the door, but I’m late. Callisto had locked them.

I pound, crying for help. “Let me out, Callisto!” I pound hard with my fisted hands. “Let me out! Open this damn door, Callisto!”

Huffing, I step back. I turn around, looking at my surroundings. There was only one way if it doesn’t work, then I will be fucked up in all the ways they possibly exist.