I was losing my head. Jake Dawson asked me on a date. And Luke Dawson wanted to kill me for it. I tried not to think about Luke, but people kept saying his name. He's hard to escape. I felt like Luke hurt me. We had shared sensitive moments together. I know we never kissed but I'm not oblivious. Almost-kisses count. The almost-romantic conversations count. The there's no quitting us and the I'll protect you until you don't need me lines were lies if he could say them and then say we barely knew each other like he said to me yesterday. I had poured my feelings out to him yesterday and he didn't even bother to address it - he just greeted Jamie and invited her into his home. At 10PM. I don't know what they did or did not do that night, but a girl going over to a guy's house alone at 10PM is a flirty move. And it's disrespectful since he's been flirting with me. I won't take that. So he can stay with Jamie and stay behaving the way I always expected him to. He's a player. And I don't. play. games. People were talking to me like they knew me now, like we'd been friends for years. They wanted to know every detail about my life – especially if it was scandalous. High school is so fake: Yesterday, no one cared I existed. Truthfully, it felt good at first. People were being nice to me. That's a rare and pleasant feeling. But then, I realized that they were digging for all the dirt on me. Unfortunately for them, there's not much. I've lived a very boring life before this summer. It became overwhelming. There was not a single friendly face in the crowd. I couldn't concentrate with all the whispers. Everyone was staring at me; I felt like I had a giant zit on my face. This wasn't how I wanted things to go down. I liked my anonymity. I think. "What does she have on him? It must be blackmail because there's no way he could naturally be attracted to her." "There's nothing natural about Millie and Jake." "Wasn't Luke in the hallway with her last week? How does she know him? It's insane." Those were the sentences I overheard wherever I went. It's like they waited to talk about me when I was present, just so I could hear the cruel words. I needed somewhere to breathe. I wanted space. The combo of losing my trust in Luke, Jake asking me on a date and the school ablaze with my name was too much. I needed time to heal/process/get used to this. At lunch time, I panicked. The gossip, the stares, the cruelty. It was too much. All this attention was like a shock to my system. I ran out into the car park and rushed to my car. If I can just get away, everyone can calm down. I started the engine and looked up. Luke Dawson was standing in front of my car. Somehow, he knew I'd be making a run for it. "We need to talk." I shook my head. The last time I saw him was at his house, when I threatened to run him over. I was in a really good position to follow through with that now. "Get out of the car, Millie," he said, pulling the door open. I slammed it shut again. I stared up at him through the glass window. He made a sign for me to open, but I refused. I couldn't face him. I revved my old cranky engine and powered out of there as fast as this ancient l box could go. Which was not that fast. I made it on the open road but then the sound of a motorbike roared behind me. My heart stopped. I saw a sleek black bike speed into my rearview mirror. The driver was in a black helmet with a red stripe on the side. Jake. What is it with the Dawson brothers? Why couldn't they leave me alone? I stopped the car and he caught up to me in a second flat. I opened the door and stepped out. Jake was not Luke. I don't even know what that means anymore. He took his helmet off and his hair cascaded over his eyes. He swept it aside and his hands wrapped themselves around my arms. "Listen to me Millie, what happened today wasn't fair on you. The school has practically erupted from the news and I didn't want to put any pressure on you." I looked away. I couldn't look into his eyes because I knew I'd cry. "I'm sorry for causing this, Millie. I'm still new here and I didn't know our school was so weird," his tone was soft and gentle with me, "What everyone's saying about you is unfair." I slowly looked into his eyes. "You're beautiful," he said, "Inside and out." Jake's voice was melodic and soothing. He was apologizing for something he hadn't even done. I gazed into his hazel brown eyes and he slowly leant forward. The breath caught in my throat. Softly, and very slowly, his lips touched mine. It was a soft and gentle kiss but I felt like I'd been electrocuted. I took a minute to react, ignoring the tingling sensations that cascaded through my body. I jumped out of his arms, back into my car and switched the engine. I pressed the gas and sped out of there. This was too much for me. This was all too much. I left Jake Dawson in the dust behind me. I couldn't bear to look back. I didn't want to see his face. I remembered how one of his tattoos was a black heart. I really hope that wasn't the color of mine. The kiss. This kiss. My mind was replaying those last few seconds over and over in my head until... Until... My tire burst and smoke started to come out of it. My car broke down. And then I broke down. And there was only one person I could call. "Mom?" I sobbed into the phone. You've reached the answering machine to- I hung up. I didn't have a spare tire, I couldn't afford calling for roadside assistance and I didn't have anyone to call. Literally no one. I was stuck. I looked at my phone and dialed his number. "Hello?" "It's me. My car broke down by Route 23. Can you pick me up?" "I'll be there." He hung up. I sat on the sidewalk, staring at my phone. Random messages were popping up from people I didn't even know. How did they get my number? I didn't know what to think anymore. All those other people were like noise, clouding out what really mattered. There were people in my life who really mattered. My family, Julia, the Dawson brothers. Two brothers. Two hot brothers with opposing qualities that were both entirely attractive. One who tried to kiss me. Me. The ugly one. The one they call unkissable. Did he mean it? Did he think he could just kiss me and that I'd fall into his arms because he's popular and I'm not? And what did I feel about the other? Was it fair to go on a date with one when I had some kind of twisted feelings for the other? His car came into view. The doors unlocked and he stepped out. When my own car had broken down, his number was the one I called. It was instinct. I may regret it. "Mills! Are you okay? Tell me you're OK," Luke ran towards me and his hands gripped my waist, his eyes scouring my body for any scratches or bruises. I had none. All my bruises were psychological. Ok, I'll stop with the melodrama. I've gotten used to Luke being there for me. He's been there for me in some pretty rough times recently. My instinct remembered that but, as my emotions calmed down and my crying stopped, I remembered just how angry I was with him. "I'm fine," I said, "My engine stopped working, that's all."