CHAPTER 28

“We leave in five. With you or without you.” Nana shouts at Audrey.

Audrey straights her skirt. It's too short she realizes, but it's too late for that realization. Her boobs are way too big for the crimson shirt as well. Thank god she'll have them covered under a jacket in no time. Thank god for winter. She hurries towards the car.

Gilberto sits in the driver's seat, eyes red as if he has not been sleeping for days. Nana sits beside him, honking the car horn unnecessarily.

“oh! Stop it Nana. I'm already here. “

“I'm calling for Cassy.”

“Stop it. She's going to come with Nate and Michaela.”

She gets into the car seat, fussing about her hair.

“Where is Xavier?”

“Steven and Xavier are already at the fair waiting for us.”

She reckons that Gilberto starts driving before dozing off.

“Did Michaela’s father make it?”

“ I don't think he'll be able to. I’ve asked them to the fare right away, with offer without her father. Her didn't seem to be interested.”

They ride of towards the fare, while Michaela and Nate fool around.

“For you check on Cassy?” Nate asks Michaela.

“Yes. She's all dolled up and sleeping.”

“It's a tiring day for them. They have to work their assess off.”

“Seriously. Let's wake her up once dad arrives.”

“sure. But don't think that I've forgiven you for what you did in afternoon.”

“You seriously need to give up. You don't even love me. Why be jealous?”

Nate ignores her questions. Does he? Not love her? He does not even know what love means. How can he know if he loves her or not. When he married her, her hated her. That he knows for sure. And right now he doesn’t. Not even a bit of that hatred has survived ever since he got to know the true complete her. He wonders how much of the gate that he felt towards her was in fact genuine? Or was it just the repercussion of the events that had led them to be together.

But then again, she was right. If he didn’t love her, where did the jealousy come from? He had warned to get rid of her for as long as he remembers. But somewhere in between, he tried and live out the direct with her. At first it took efforts, but with time it was effortless. Did that effortlessness change into love? It would be a story to tell if it did.

“Answer me.” Michaela “ I don’t want to.”

Michaela makes her way to where Nate stands, fixing his sweatshirt. She grabs his butt from behind.

“You don’t know if you love me or not?”

“I don’t care.”

“How pathetic of you. Had you hated me, the answer would have come instantly. “

Nate turns around to look at Michaela.

“Do you love me Mr Walsh?”

“ Don’t pester me Michaela.”

Nate grabs his jacket from the table and tries to move away from her.

Frustrated she pushes him on the bed.

“Tell me. Do you? I need to know.”

“Stop it Mickey. It’s not funny anymore.”

“I don’t think I want to continue with you anymore.”

The words come so suddenly that Nate is caught off guard.

“What?” he says, in disbelief.

Michaela looks at him with glazed eyes.

“I don’t want to cheat all them Nate. I was being a bitch, having you married to me like that. You deserve so much better than all of this. They deserve better than me Nate. When I look at Nana and Gilberto and Cassy and Audrey, it causes me unremarkable distress. To know how all the love and affection that I feel for all of you are based on lies. I cannot go on with it anymore Nate. I cannot for the life of me give them greater grief.”

Michaela feels like crying already, telling him all this. But she knows she needs to be tough. She owes it to everyone but especially to Nate.

“I thought that just because I loved you, you should live me too. And for that I took all those actions that has further degraded my sense of being. I’m sorry. For all that I’ve done and for all that I’m doing”

Nate looks at Michaela, for the very first time as his wife. The woman he sleeps next to , the woman he wakes up to, the woman who hugs him in her sleep and lends her a non judgemental ear, every time he has something in his mind. It feels like forever. And now she wants to go?

For how long has he prayed for it? Asked from good, nothing but riddance. For how long has he cursed her for undeterred spirit and stubbornness. Then why on the earth does he feel so anxious. There is disappointment bin his heart. He is bewildered by her impromptu decision of ending things.

“Where is this coming from?” he asks.

“I have my reasons to feel this way Nate. And the only reason that I think my staying here is justified, is if you have miraculously fallen in love with me. And as far as I can see. It’s not that..”

“What makes you so sure? “

“Isnt it true? Or do you love me.”

“How can you, out of thin air, ask me such question and expect from me to answer it here and now. At least give me time. This is not just the matter of love Michaela. Us ending things will be a breach of contract. And in no world will I take such an embarrassment on my name.”

“I am the maker of that contract. And if I say the deal is over. It is.”

“Its not that easy. And why do you have to talk about all of this right now. Right now, all that I care about it that my family is waiting for us at the fare. We can take care of this stuff later. I reckon Andrew will bring your father directly to the destination. We need to leave before you turn me into an imbecile.”

“Wait....” Michaela tries to stop him.

But Nate is beyond exasperated. He has enough on his mind to worry about. He does not need Michaela to madden him further.

She pulls at his arm but he uses all his force to escape her.

“Okay. Okay.”

She yells. He stops mid track.

She slips a chit into his pocket.

“Just promise me.” She said.

“What now.”

“You can take all the time in the world. Just promise me, if in case of a miracle you realize that you love me you’ll open this chit. And if not, you’ll throw it away. Promise me.”

Nate does not understand the point of all this drama. Why? What for? He knows nothing would change. Yet he nods in agreement.

“Whatever floats your boat.” He says and continues to drag her towards Cassy's.

It’s a long way to the fair. Cassy sleeps for most part of the journey. She hasn’t payed that much attention to her dressing as well. She has out on a faded black jeans and a white sweatshirt on top. But then again, she is Cassy. Even in them, she looks drop dead gorgeous.

As for Michaela, she has but on a ribbed dress with knee length boots and an overcoat. She cannot wait to he inside.

When Nate parks the car, she flings the door open and rushes to the candy shop.

“”Can I have one?” she asks Nate, pointing to the Cotton candy fluffing up like a cloud.

However, it's not Nate but Cassy who buys it for her.

Holding Nate's hand she makes her way in. The lights flickers and twinkles. Lights of all colours possible. It feels like utopia already.

As they walk further a weird smell hits her nose. The sweetness of chocolates, candies and caramel amalgamated with the smell of cheese and popcorn and the spices and oil. It makes Michaela’s stomach turn. Apart from that, the cacophony of sounds that plays in the background makes her head spin. The cry of the children begging their parents to buy them stuff, the yelling of the people on the huge rides, scared to death, the shopkeepers calling for customers and the constant blabbering of people that follows.

She wants to try everything. If that was even possible.

They spent hours, going from one shop to another, buying stuff. Playing games and winning stuff. Oh ! The joy it gave her. She tried everything, except the rides. The rides terrified her. She sat on the Ferris wheel, but it made her nauseous. And so it was decided. No rides.

Nate steals glances at her whenever he can. Everything at this fair, he has seen to many times before. But her? She is the one his eyes dart towards. He could have stared at her forever. The way her eyes have been wide open ever since they made it here. The lights flicker in her eyes and every infant catches her attention. She buys and eats candies as if it is nobodies business. She seldom walks, most of the times she is just hopping her way here and there. Or better yet she darts. Every time an unlikable thing catches her attention, she darts towards it and then waits for Nate to walk over. And he in return smiles at her like a fool. Like a fool in love.

Nate’s phones rings. It’s Andrew.

“Are you here?” Nate asks.

“Yes. Boss.”

“Okay. We’ll be there.”

“He has already left, looking for his daughter.”

“Okay.”

“Boss.”

“What?”

“I think we have a problem.”

Michaela is busy munching the caramel popcorns while Nate is talking on the call. Her eyes drift everywhere as if taking in all the details of the night. She wants to make sure she remembers everything for as long as possible.

Her eyes shift towards a dark figure. As he walks forward, Michaela can see his face take form.

“Dad.” Michaela shouts and runs into the arms of Mr. Edgar Rosewood.

He holds her tightly, his nose buried into her hair.

“I missed you.” She whispers to him.

But no reply comes from him. She looks up. Her father looks straight ahead.

Nate stands in front of them, the phone is stuck to his ear while his hand tightens on it.

“Michaela.” Cassy shouts from afar. Looking blindly towards the both of them like a dummy.

Their expressions puzzle Michaela.

“Dad?” she says.

Edgar Rosewood clutches her tighter into his arms.

“I missed you my love.”