Chapter 10 Chapter 10
He was still lying there when she was out of sight. This was all wrong. His reaction wasn’t normal at all. Okay, some of it was very normal, he was male, whether in animal or human form–but this dizzying rush he got just looking at her was, well, he didn’t know what, but knew he’d never felt it before.
Huffing out a breath, he finally stood back up and turned to where he’d left his clothes. He looked once in the direction he knew she would be, wanting nothing more than to follow her, just sit and watch —for the rest of the day. He shook his head. No, he was taking his furry ass back to the house and calling his father. If anyone would know what the hell was wrong with him, it would be his father. He is, after all, the alpha and ruler of not just the pack but the entire shifter world, so he would know, wouldn’t he?
It was rare that Devin spoke to his father about anything related to their kind. It had always been a sore spot between them. He’d fought being the next in line to take over the pack, but today he needed fatherly wisdom and advice—or answers—before he lost his mind completely. The fact that he was willing to swallow his pride, pride that the Addison family was notorious for, and seek guidance from someone showed he was neck deep in some kind of trouble.
After dressing, he wandered back to the house at a leisurely pace, not wanting to rush and make the call. Just by taking that first step and calling his father, Devin would be giving in to what they wanted for him, in a small way. This alone caused the procrastination. He knew his parents wanted him to step into his so called rightful place as alpha of the pack. If it were just that, Devin may have already agreed by now. By taking over the wolf pack, he was also stepping into the role as the ruler of the Shifter Alliance.
He knew the history behind the Alliance and was all for it, Devin just didn’t know if he was the one to take on the enormous responsibility. His father believed he was being wise to stop and consider all aspects. Mother’s take on it was that he was being irresponsible.
Devin’s sister had taken the easy way out. She had mated with a non-shifter, or a one-form as most shifters called them, as they only had one form. He could do that and marry a one-form too, hopefully he would love that person wholly as his sister, Raquel, did. To mate with one of his own left Devin no choice but to take the succession that was his fathers to give. He didn’t like having his options removed any more than he liked to think he would take the easy way out.
The shifter world hadn’t always been so organized and peaceful. He shook his head, peace was still something that was hard fought for with infighting constantly flaring up among the varying clans in the many species. In the time of his great-grandparents, and for most of his grandparents’ lives, each were out for their own. After too many years of bloodshed with certain species being close to extinct, it was decided that the Alliance was necessary to protect them in their human and animal forms from one-forms, hunters and at times the different clans.
It took years to establish the Alliance of the clans. Each clan had a leader and a sub-leader, both of whom were part of the council, but just one clan would rule as the monarch and be the ruler of the Alliance. He’d always found it odd that the wolves ended up being the ones elected for this honor. Odd in the way that he knew most of the larger shifters could probably tromp him into the ground when in his wolf form, well, if they could catch him and get past him biting their limbs off. Possibly that was the reason the wolves reigned, their cunning was far more advantageous than the quick temper and brute strength of the larger forms.
Devin glanced up to see his door only a few feet away and regretted that he’d reached it so soon. Yes, he was a Prince in hiding. He could not make this phone call and just allow the next in line to take his place, then he thought of his selfish, arrogant cousin, Leon, and Devin made the choice to open the door and go make the call.
With a beer in hand, Devin stared at the phone that he’d just hung up. His father had understood and been tactful enough to not rub it in his face that finally he needed dear old dad. He took another long swig of the beer and swallowed quickly. The fact that he didn’t like the answer wasn’t the problem. The problem was that he really hadn’t liked the answers, even though his gut told him that his father was right, and now he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t like it when he wasn’t in control of something and Devin was definitely not in control of this.
He slid further down on the couch and leaned his head back against it. Closing his eyes, Devin thought of the highlights of the conversation, hoping he’d missed something that would prove he had a choice. “Does she smell like pack, son?” He’d had to confess he had been afraid to get close enough to smell her, that all he could say for sure was Rayne smelled like gardenias. His father had chuckled and told him that was close enough. How the hell did smelling like gardenias come close to smelling like pack? He’d figure that part out later. Devin had asked if he could think of any other reason for her to affect him so completely, other than the reason he didn’t want to hear. His father had chuckled again, not something he’d ever done that often but he told him no, even if he’d been without sex for a decade—not happening—no ordinary woman would get to him that way. That range of emotions was the way he’d tastefully put it. That was an understatement. In a matter of a few hours I wanted to hug and hold her, shelter and protect her, follow her every movement, fuck her and adore every inch of her in a non-sexual way. Those emotions were more than enough to deal with.
Devin opened his eyes and drank what was left in the bottle in one swallow. “You’ve found your true mate from the sounds of it, Devin, and you can’t change that. Only you can decide if you want to bond with her completely or not… if she’ll have you.” That was not the answer he wanted. “But she’s not one of us.” Had been the only defense he had and it was a weak one at that. “She could be— I’m fairly certain she must be, or you, being who you are, would not react this way.” Again, not even close to what he wanted to hear his father and alpha say. “How can you be sure?” That was when his father had started laughing before he’d regained his composure and cleared his throat to continue. “You couldn’t send her away, could you?” No, had come out of Devin’s mouth, sulky in a way he’d never heard from his own voice. “I’ve never known you to have a soft spot for anyone, son, have you?”
Devin gripped the bottle tight in his hand. Well, fuck! I have a mate and she smells like gardenias. Now he sat there trying to figure out if he should go back to bed and try to wake up from this nightmare, or go roll around at her feet and hope she rubbed his belly.
He tipped the bottle back up to his mouth and then remembered it was empty. Lowering it again, he glared. “What if I don’t want a mate?” Years ago he had thought that was what he’d wanted, but that fantasy had long ago faded away. One of his best friends had found their mate and had died because of it. He’d seen too many males from the pack, and the rest of the shifter clans lose everything because of a mate that wouldn’t accept them. Why was it up to the female? He didn’t know. What if he went to her and she rejected him?
Lowering the bottle into his lap, he rolled his head to the side to look at the window. She was out there and the only question pounding inside his skull was did he want her to be? He didn’t know. Hormones aside, he honestly didn’t know if he wanted to go find out if she was his, or if she was one of his kind and knew it. What he was, Devin decided, was a mess.
The only thing he could do to prevent this disaster from destroying his world was to control it. She was not going to get to him—he was in control. It would be him who decided if mating was going on the program, and it would be him and no one else that chose when it would happen.