Chapter 26

Ian read through Jo’s letter again. In the eleven months since she’d left, he’d read it so many times that the paper was now soft and worn.

Dear Ian, I was hoping that we could clear things up between us before I left. I’m sorry to have missed you.

For as long as I live, I will always regret not being upfront with you from the beginning. It has cost me much. I understand that maybe you don’t feel the same way about me that I feel about you, due to all that has happened without your knowledge. It is understandable.

Things happen. Sometimes, there is no reason for it. People are involved in accidents and sustain life-changing injuries. Family members do stupid things to help the ones they love because they can’t bear their suffering. And foolish girls fall in love with guys they have no business falling in love with.

I realize that we will probably never see each other again. And I realize that you probably don’t even want a friendship, and I will try to accept that. But I do hope that someday, you will be able to forgive me.

—Johanna There really was no need to read through it again as by this time, he had it memorized. This one piece of paper made him feel connected to Jo, no matter how tenuous that connection was. He sighed. Over the last eleven months, he really should have responded or gotten in touch with her. But he hadn’t. What would he say? How could they pick up where they’d left off? They had parted on bad terms, and that was on him. But he had an idea, so all was not lost.

Carefully, he folded up the letter and slipped it into his pocket. He headed up to Nana’s house. It was nice not to have to use the crutches anymore. After months of physical therapy, he had almost full range of motion with his ankle. But he could always tell when the rain was coming by the way it ached. Christmas was only weeks away, and he couldn’t believe another year had come and gone. But he was in a much better place than he had been a year ago.

Nana was in the spare room with a suitcase open on the bed. She went through piles of clothes, and some she placed inside the suitcase, others she left on the other twin bed.

“Oh, Ian, there you are.” Nana smiled. “Would you like some breakfast?”

Ian shook his head. “No, Nana, I’m fine. Are you almost ready for your trip?”

Her eyes sparkled. “I am! I can’t wait to stay with Mary, and she has all these things planned for us. Bill and Barbara are taking us to New York City to see the sights. Rockefeller Center at Christmastime! It’s like a dream come true.”

Ian fingered Johanna’s letter in his pocket, trying to strengthen his resolve. “I was wondering if you’d like some company on your trip.”

Nana paused, holding a folded nightgown in her hands. “What do you mean?”

“I was thinking of going with you,” he said quietly. “I want to see Johanna.”

Nana burst into a smile. “That’s wonderful. Of course you can come with me. They’ll be so delighted!”

Ian held up his hand. “Nana, you can tell Mary, but I’d like to surprise Johanna.” It was going to be a surprise all right. Since the last day he’d seen her, he had done nothing but think of her. Constantly. All the time. He needed to say some things to her, and he didn’t want her to know he was coming in case she refused to see him.

“That’ll be wonderful. I always had high hopes for the two of you,” Bridie said. She set her nightgown in the suitcase. “But what about work?”

“I took some time off,” he explained. The previous February, as he was contemplating taking a position with his team, Sky Sports had contacted him about a commentator/analyst position for the televised games. He’d jumped at the chance. It involved a lot of travel, but he found he was a natural for the position. He loved it.

“Did you plan that too? You and Bridie? The matchmaking?” he asked.

Nana grinned. “No, but I wish I had thought of it. My only concern at the time was getting you out of your house and out of your rut.”

Ian nodded. Nana went back to sorting clothes and packing her suitcase.

“Will I take Scruff out for you?”

“That would be a help. The poor thing doesn’t know what’s going on. He saw the suitcase come in from the garage and he bolted,” Nana said, shaking her head.

Ian paused in the doorway. “Nana, about all that—last year—thanks for looking out for me.”

Nana smiled and walked over to him and hugged him. She barely came up to his chest and felt tiny when he wrapped his arms around her.

“That’s what nanas are for,” she said. “To have your back.”

He kissed the top of her head. “Thanks.”

“Now go on, this suitcase won’t pack itself,” she chided.

He called the dog, and Scruff scrabbled across the tile floor to the front door, where Ian hooked the lead onto his collar. Christmas couldn’t come fast enough. The thought of seeing Johanna buoyed him. He stopped in his tracks as a thought hit him. What if Jo had moved on? What if she had a boyfriend? Was he so arrogant he thought he could swan in and sweep her off her feet? He was starting to have second thoughts.

For the next three blocks as he walked the dog, he bolstered his resolve with the thought that he’d just hop on a plane and come back home if she wasn’t receptive to him. Either way, he was going to say what he needed to say and then move on with his life, either with her or without her.

Over the past year, his ears always perked up any time Nana mentioned she’d spoken to Jo’s grandmother. At first, he’d asked if there was any news on Jo, and then it got to the point where he didn’t need to ask her anymore. She just told him.

Jo had been busy since she’d left Ireland. Through the grandmothers’ grapevine, he’d learned that she had given up her apartment and moved back in with her parents. She’d started with some classes at the community college last semester and had enrolled in a degree program at the university near her parents’ home back in August. Her news was all good, and Ian was glad that she had moved on with her life. There’d been no mention of a boyfriend or dating, and he hoped that was the case.

Once Scruff had been walked, Ian took his grandmother to town for some last-minute shopping before the trip. He’d traded in his old car for a newer model, and it had been good to be driving again.

After their trip to town, Nana talked him into going to the mall, where he finished his own Christmas shopping.

Once they were home, he went to his own house to pack his suitcase, anxious to get to the States to see Johanna.