Sharon really did have a great time in Vienna but her thoughts had been haunted with erotic thoughts of Bryan.
She felt that she might never be truely free form him. He had possessed her body and soul.
After Christmas, as she was flying back with David, she felt her stomach cramp with the thought of seeing Bryan again. Not only had her holiday been haunted with erotic thoughts of Bryan but his threat, the memory of the threat in his face and his voice the day before she and David had left London for Vienna.
She should have told him that she had no intention of marrying David but when his black eyes had blazed down at him with that look of contempt, she had wanted to hit him back somehow, anyhow. If he wanted to believe that she was pursuing David, let him! she thought which was very stupid.
She had known that, a few minutes later but had been too proud to go after him and tell him the truth. Would he have listened anyway? Probably not.
Her mood shifted again as she looked out the window of the plane at the clouds through which they were descending. If he believed that she was capable of marrying David for his money, nothing she could have said would have made any difference.
'Aren't you feeling well?' David asked, his voice very anxious.
She turned, very startled. 'What?'
'Your colour keeps coming and going and you're so tense!' He glanced down at the arm of her seat and she looked down, too, only then realizing how she was gripping them, her knuckles white.
Hurriedly, she relaxed her fingers. 'Landing makes me nervous', she lied.
'Nice to get back to London though', David said contentedly, stretching in his seat. 'Vienna was wonderful but I am always glad to get back to London and work'.
'Vienna was a dream', Sharon closed her eyes to visualize it. Vienna in the snow was theatrical: a chandelier of the city glittering and faintly unreal sometimes.The imperial places echoing with dead voices and living music.
Had David forgotten how he had seemed to be enjoying himself while he was there?
'I could spend a year here without getting bored', he had said as they sat the window of a cafe near the Spanish Riding School. They had come at the wrong time of the year but they wanted to see the building, so they had gone to the cafe to sip coffee with a lot of garnishments put in it.
'You might not get bored but you will definitely get fat', Sharon said pushing away her cake, unfinished. 'Gorgeous but too rich for me. Viennese cake must be the best in the world. What are we going to do on our last day here?'
'We haven't had our ride through the Vienna woods yet', David pointed out. 'Lets do that tomorrow'.
'Yes, I'd love that, it's one of the things I was most looking forward to. I wonder if you can still ride on a sleigh?'
'No doubt at a price', David said drily. 'The woods will be deep with snow of course'.
'Oh wonderful. I'll wear my new red boots and the cap and mittens that I bought at the Christmas fair', Sharon said.
'Anymore shopping to do?'
'No, my suitcase is already packed with presents I am taking back. I don't have any more room '.
David looked at her wistfully, 'You aren't sorry you came are you Sharon?'
'Of course not! I've had a wonderful time!'
It was the truth and yet not quite true. Christmas had been fun, they had given each other presents, enjoyed Christmas Viennese style. They had flung each other into Christmas like children, pulled crackers, worn paper hats, waved streamers.
After dinner each night, they had waltzed, laughed and talked with other guests amongst other things.
Yet Sharon had felt melancholy. She didn't quite know why. Perhaps because she had kept remembering Bryan's angry eyes and kept wanting to cry, perhaps she felt guilty at having not gone home, although her parents had said that they understood why she wanted to do something different that year and hadn't seemed hurt. They had always been self sufficient, she didn't imagine that her absence would spoil their usual quiet Christmas, yet she still felt guilty.
The hotel was exceptionally comfortable, the food excellent, the staff kind but it was the strangest Christmas she had ever spent. David had seemed livelier than he had ever been. He had thrown himself into everything, determined to enjoy everything, so for his sake, she was glad that she had come. But in the end, they had not got their ride through the Vienna woods in the snow.
Sharon had felt too I'll on their last day. The food in Vienna was too rich and since she had hot pregnant,any unusual food got her queasy. The only cure was to rest,keep still and be very careful of what she ate and drank. So she had stayed in the hotel, resting all day on her bed while David had amused himself, taking a last look around the museum and some other notable places.
There were two of his favourite paintings David wanted to see again, "Hunters in the Snow" and "Peasant Wedding". He sat in front of them for a long time. He told her later that he did that while worshipping the genius of his favourite painter.
'You know, there's this woman in one canvas, very pregnant. I kept thinking of you. And I thought... you are going to have to tell Bryan sooner or later, Sharon?'
She turned her head to look at him, her face tense. 'I'm not going to! And you'd better not, David! I don't want him to know anything about the baby'.
'I understand you're angry with him,but... Sharon, I'm sorry but I have to say this.I think that he has the right to know', David said sounding quite grave. I'd want to if it was my baby'.
'You are not Bryan's, Sharon said bitterly. 'You have a strong sense of personal responsibility. He has none at all. And anyway, I am the one having this baby and not him. It's nothing to do with him'.
David shifted restlessly, looking pugnacious. 'I thought you had more sense than to repeat all that claptrap about women being the only one having right over a baby just because it happens to be carried in her womb for nine months. Genetically, half the input of the baby came from Bryan, afterall, surely that gives him some rights? I'm sure he will agree to help you financially and even though you earn a very good salary, a baby can be expensive, especially of you are going to have a full time nanny'.
'I wouldn't take his money if I have to beg on the streets instead!'she broke out trembling violently. David looked taken aback.
Sharon saw that she had shocked him again. David, like most men had a conservative streak, he was easily shocked by unconventional behaviour. She wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. But it was tears that won aching behind her eyes. 'David, I don't want to talk about this', she said huskily, blinking the tears away. 'I'm too tired. I just want to get home and go to bed. My head aches' and I can't think straight. Can we leave this discussion till some other time?'
'I'm sorry, was I badgering you? David asked sounding conscience stricken. 'I won't say another word. Why didn't you tell me you were so exhausted? Poor girl. You do look white. If you aren't better on Monday, take some time off. You ought to see your doctor too, have a check up - you might be anaemic or something. Isn't that quite common with pregnant women?'
She laughed helplessly. 'Oh, David, you are just too sweet. Don't worry. My iron intake is fine.I'm sure I'll be back to normal on Monday. Flying always makes me feel tired'.
He dropped her at her flat an hour after they landed, and she went straight to bed and slept like the dead.