Chapter 33 33
Brent’s POV
“What are you saying, Jake? Let go of Lucianna?”
I must be hearing things.
The two of them might have started messy but I know how Jacob got connected with Lucianna. It’s beyond the bond, and he starts to live getting used of her around.
And letting her go? What’s gotten into him this time?
“I’m thinking…” Jacob paused and I (im)patiently waited for more words.
Jacob was looking at the darkness, his expression was unreadable because of the lack of light from where he were facing.
I sighed when I heard nothing more.
“Jacob, explain it to me, please. What’s with letting her go?”
“That’s what I just said.” he hissed and I saw him shook his head a bit, as if he can’t believe his own words.
If Jacob was really trying to set Lucianna free, does that mean he will let her out of his hold? Out of his control? Out of his land? Out of his pack? Out of his life? What?
Clearing my throat, I decided to start giving answers and stopped questioning him.
“Without your mate, you’ll be nothing but a shell and everyday will be your doom. Jacob, if you can, let her go without completing the process. That way, she’ll be back fast. Otherwise, if you complete the mating with Lucianna, she can go on with her life alone for month and God knows how you can survive once she’s gone.”
Manipulation was not a choice right now. Seeing Jacob, I know he won’t be moved by those so I feed him facts.
Though hearing facts does not mean he will be moved.
His moment of silence tells me that he was thinking about it. Which scares me more. I feared his sincerity about this topic. I’m the Beta of his pack, it was my job to care about anything that might concern the Shadow pack.
And Jacob’s downfall means the pack going down, too.
I don’t want a bad record for him, as the Alpha, and also for me.
“I answered your question. Whatever your choice is, the pack won’t be stable if you won’t, Jacob. You’re my Alpha, we placed our life and protection in your care so--”
“I’m hoping to have this talk with the friend I grew up with, not my advisor.”
I gulped, taken aback from what he said.
Licking my lips, I looked away and shook my head. This man has been a handful job ever since.
Maybe dropping my tasks won’t hurt me.
“Then I would like to know why. As a friend you grew up with.”
“I know what she wants and that’s anything but me. I’m out of her list, I… failed as a mate.”
“And that means you’ll give her up just like that?” I hissed. “Can you even do that.”
Jacob chuckled in a low and sad way, sighing at the end.
“I’m asking the same to myself and that is why I want to know how my decision will affect me.”
“And I answered you. Now that you heard the worst, did that changed your mind?”
I prayed every god and deity that he will.
But the way his jaw clenched made me sigh.
“I’m asking to prepare myself, not to change my mind. I plan to set her free--”
“With or without completing the mating--” he cut my question.
“I will give her that decision.”
My eyes widened. Jacob looked away more that the back of his head was facing me.
“You’ll talk to her about this?!”
“I can’t risk it. She might misinterpret my actions if I let her go and that’s the least of what I want.”
Is that the only thing that you want that you will try to have?
Damn it, Jacob!
I sighed instead of voicing out my thoughts. There’s a hundred and one reason in my head that says this plan was a disaster but what can I do?
I’m a friend right now, and I don’t wanna shift back to being a beta or I won’t hear any of this!
“Whatever you want, then.” I sighed in defeat.
Jacob looked at me and smiled before walking away.
I was stunned.
That look…
I never saw him… like that.
Like a hopeless lion, on the edge of dying. Like a family of a dead soldier. Like a wolf, praying to the moon.
This was the first time Jacob lose his cool. And I mean it.
Lucianna’s POV
I woke up and all I feel was the weight in my chest, its heavy and I feel like exploding or crying again.
My eyes snapped open when I noticed a presence inside the room. I’m curled in the bed, hugging a huge pillow under the blanket and there’s someone in the room with me.
Jacob.
My hands clenched on the pillow, gaining strength to pull the blanket off my head and meet his eyes.
I closed my eyes, screwing it shut.
Damn it.
“Good morning, Lucianna.” his voice was ice cold and I shivers.
He knew I’m awake so I got out of the blanket. Jacob was leaning on the wall, already looking at me when I saw him.
I was quick to divert my eyes elsewhere, his eyes were melting me now more than before.
“What are you doing here?” I asked after clearing my throat. My voice came out a hoarse bedroom voice.
Did he slept here with me?
No, I would’ve known.
I glanced at him again and noticed dark circles on his eyes. Where did he sleep? Or did he?
Jacob walked to the bed, to me. I watched his slow movements until he sat on the edge of the bed just beside me.
He touched the pillow I’m hugging, caress it and I suddenly got envious to the lucky thing with the way he do that.
“I forgot you hate sleeping alone in such huge bed.” he whispered. I shivered again from the sound of his voice.
How can he turn from cold and aloof to warm and kind so quick?
It’s creating a chaos in me.
Closing my eyes as I looked away, I cursed in my head.
“I-I’ll get used to it…” I said in a neutral voice, hiding the effects of him to me.
There was a long silence and it was hard to keep my eyes away from him when I’m dead curious what he looked like right now.
“I know we planned to stay for a week but I think we’ll have to leave tomorrow at sunrise.” he said.
I bit my lip. I knew why, and its because of the troubles I caused but since he never opened it up yet, I didn’t mentioned it, too.
With a nod, I sighed and sat up.
I looked at him and his eyes never left mine. The way he looked at me feels… strange. It’s not the usual look he has given me before but I shrugged it off.
“I’ll need a bath.”
Jacob nodded. “I’ll wait for you. Do you want to have breakfast here or at the ground hall?”
Quickly, I shook my head. “W-Wait for me outside. I’ll go down after freshening up.”
There’s no way I’ll let him wait for me as I do something as private as taking a bath. I knew he saw my entirety but the situation has changed for me now.
Embarrassment coiled me whole from the way he gaze at me. It was so bold, and yet he feels so distant.
He nodded, understanding what I meant and stood up.
“We’ll eat together and stroll around. There’s something I’d like to talk about with you.”
Stroll around?
An unfamiliar discomfort hugged my body. I… what was this? Am I scared? Of what?
I cleared my throat to avoid stuttering as my mind wanders.
“I-I plan to visit Ashi later so…”
Jacob looked at me, expressionless. I noticed how his jaw moved and I gulped.
“At sunset then.” he said with finality and strode out of my room, closing the door behind him.
Damn it.
Why am I getting nervous like this? Was this guilt?
After taking a bath and dressing myself, I was nervous as I headed down to the ground hall where the dining area was.
Jacob stood up from where he was seated when I entered the hall so I could see him. I gulped when our eyes met once again and there’s the strange pinched in my chest.
I’ll bet my life this was not another wave of heat.
Its… something else.
Feeling like burning from his gaze, I looked away and continued walking towards the table where he’s at.
Brent saw me coming and he excused himself before I could reach their table. He nodded at me and gave me a small smile before turning away.
Again, I felt the slow torment of my mind.
I feel like everybody was looking at me, and saying things on my back. But upon looking around, no one was turning my way.
“I ordered for us, I hope you don’t mind.” Jacob said in his usual manly voice.
I nodded for response.
No one was talking between us and I avoids to look at him because I know his eyes are all on me.
Discomfort, again. And its so hard to get through it as seconds passed.
The waiter served our food and I silently felt grateful for a distraction. We ate in silence and I tried my best to focus on eating.
Jacob seems to understand something I don’t so he never bothered me while I chose to act like he’s not in front of me.
We finished breakfast and Jacob decided to break the deafening silence.
“I’ll drive you to the Ancestral.”
“No!” I cursed in my head when I realized that I said it too loud. I cleared my throat. “I mean, I’m fine. I-I want to be alone.”
Jacob looked at me as his jaw clenches. My insides panicked.
He looked angered. Am I so obvious that I don’t want to be with him?
“Fine, take Harley with you.”
In relief that he won’t come with me, I nodded and smiled.
Jacob’s brow furrowed.
“You’re fine with him but not with me, huh.” he was stern as he said that.
Holy molly.
I sipped on my beverage and looked away but he seems to magnetized my gaze that I looked back to his dangerous eyes again.
“W-Well, its his job a-and you might have something to do o-on your own.”
Damn it, tongue! I’ll really cut you off if you stutter again!
Jacob looked at our empty plates and raised his brow. I can see that he didn’t bought what I just said.
“What time will I pick you up, then?”
I gulped. Why does he need to do that!
“Harley can take m--”
“I’m picking you up, Lucianna.” his voice emphasizes every word. “There is something we needed to talk about. Give me time, baby.”
The way he said the last word sound pleading, far from his hard expression. My jaw dropped.
Did I liked how that sounded?
I nodded and looked away.
“I’ll tell you when we finished.”
Its better to mind-link him than to give a specific time. I’m not sure if we’ll finish talking early or not.
“I will be waiting.” He said and stood up. He nodded to someone at the left and I saw Harley walking towards us.