Desperation had taken hold of me, and I knew I needed to do something. My decision was instant and impulsive. I needed to reconnect with my werewolf nature, the one that had always been there to protect me and my children. The moon, on that special Blue Moon night, seemed to beckon me, and I decided to follow it.
I ran out of the house, bare feet, finding the path to the forest. Each step I took brought me closer to the darkness of the woods, but I didn't feel afraid. My need to find my children outweighed any fear the darkness might evoke. I knew I needed to regain the strength that would allow me to face the unknown and bring my children back home.
I walked into the forest, guided by the moon's glow, until I found a small stream snaking through the woods. The moon was high in the sky, its light reflected in the calm waters of the stream. It was a tranquil and magical place, somewhere I had often come to find peace and reflection.
Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and let the tranquility of the place take over me. It was time to reconnect with the Moon Goddess, the entity that always represented the essence of my werewolf transformation. The moon on that special night was a symbol of my rebirth, of my rediscovery.
I began to pray, in a soft whisper, asking the Moon Goddess for help, to restore the connection I had lost.
Closing my eyes, I began to silently pray, seeking that connection that was once so strong. “Moon Goddess, I beseech your help. Please show me the way, guide me in this time of darkness. I need to find my children; I need to find my inner wolf.”
However, something strange happened. I felt a barrier, as if the Goddess had denied my prayer. It was as if she was rejecting the connection between us, and the rejection was almost physical, like a push.
I felt weak and empty, lost amidst the shadows of the forest. The moon above me seemed distant, and I wondered if my inner wolf was lost forever. My despair grew, and I knew I couldn't give up, not when my children depended on me.
I decided to kneel, as a last act of desperation, and looked at the moon once again, pleading with all the strength I had left. “Moon Goddess, please help me. I have no one else to turn to. My inner wolf is lost, and my children are in danger. I will do anything, absolutely anything, to have her back. Please, help me.”
I didn't know what to expect, but I was willing to make any sacrifice to have my inner wolf back, to be able to use my strength to find my children. The moon shone brightly, and then something surprising happened.
A feeling of warmth and light began to spread through my body, as if the moon itself was embracing me. A voice softly whispered in my mind, a voice that echoed with the wisdom and serenity of the Goddess.
“You've forgotten who you are, Fierce. Your wolf never abandoned you, but you denied her. She's still there, waiting for you.”
A memory surged, flooding my mind like a torrent of emotions. It was the last time I transformed, a moment I had suppressed, blocked, because it hurt too much. It was when Hunter, the father of my children, broke my heart, leaving behind rejection and betrayal that still echoed in my chest.
The pain of that farewell had made me make a promise to myself, a promise I had forgotten: I would never allow myself to be vulnerable again. To keep that promise, I had buried my inner wolf, suffocating and denying her. And now, I was reaping the consequences of that decision.
Tears flooded my eyes as the memory of pain, betrayal, and the decision I made that day resurfaced. I had closed myself off to protect my heart, but in doing so, I had also lost a vital part of myself. Now I knew what I needed to do.
“Moon Goddess, thank you,” I murmured, my voice choked. “Thank you for showing me the way.”
The Goddess's response was a comforting warmth that began to spread through me. I knew my journey was just beginning, but now I had a direction. I had to confront the past, the pain, and the decision that led me to lose my inner wolf.
***
The next morning arrived with a cloudy sky, but the decision was made. I needed to do what the Moon Goddess guided me to do, and that involved going back to my past, facing the painful memories I had buried, and unraveling the mystery that seemed to be related to my ability to transform into a werewolf. I packed some clothes and loaded them into my car.
The unexpected action did not go unnoticed. My neighbor, Meg Stuart, was outside, watching with curiosity as I packed my things into the car.
Meg approached, her inquisitive eyes not missing a detail. She was known for her sharp tongue and thirst for gossip, and I knew I wouldn't be able to avoid her questions. Taking a deep breath, I prepared to face her.
“Fierce, is everything okay?” Meg asked, with a falsely concerned expression on her face.
I took a deep breath and replied, “As well as can be, Meg. The situation is tough.”
She tilted her head, clearly curious, and asked, “Where are you going? I don't think it's a good idea to leave while the investigations are ongoing.”
I knew I needed a good excuse, something that wouldn't raise suspicions. “My parents invited me to spend some time with them in Denver, Colorado. They think it would be good for me to get away for a while until things settle down here.”
The lie slipped easily from my lips, and I wondered if Meg would believe it. However, my parents were merely a cover. I was an orphan, raised by Alastair's pack, and my true origin was a secret I kept under lock and key.
Meg's eyes widened in surprise. “Denver? That's a long car trip, Fierce. It'll take you more than a day to get there.”
I closed the car door, knowing I couldn't prolong the conversation. “Yes, Meg, but I think it's exactly what I need. Distract my mind and try to find some peace. Maybe you should try something similar instead of worrying so much about other people's lives.”
Meg opened her mouth but seemed to find no words to respond. She just shook her head, still surprised by my response, and walked away, seemingly unsure what to do with my unexpected behavior.
Once Meg was out of sight, I got into the car, started the engine, and began driving towards my past, the place where it all began, where my inner wolf had been suffocated. I knew this journey would be full of challenges, painful secrets, and difficult confrontations, but it was the only path I could tread.
I was ready to face my past because, more than ever, my children depended on me, and I would do whatever it took to have them back.