Chapter Twenty-Five— As Long as We Both Shall Live

I woke up and checked my phone. I had seven missed calls from Mona and a couple texts from Candy, asking if I was All right. I ignored Mona and texted Candy. I told her that I was fine, since she thought I was with Mona. A handy lie but one that I would only get away with so many times before I was caught.

I showered and changed into all I had to wear, the shirt I took from Nickolas and my uniform skirt. Then I went to take care of Dahlia. I got her all ready for the day and then I took her into the kitchen. She sat at the table while I made her eggs and toast.

“Where’s Nicky?” she asked. “Is he still sick?”

I looked over my shoulder from the stove. “He is. He’s sleeping, so I’m taking you in today.”

“Yay!”

I cleaned the dishes as Dahlia finished eating. Then I wrote out a note for Nickolas, just in case he woke up and I was gone. He needed to know I was coming back. That I would always come back.

I got Dahlia into the car and we went. Her teacher was a little surprised that I was there instead of Nickolas, but I told her the story. He seemed to be fine and just let it go. I almost thought she was going to call the police on me.

I drove back home as quickly as I could.

When I got back inside, I heard the shower running. The bedroom door was open, so I just walked in. I had little doubt he would care if I saw him naked again.

I put his keys on his side of the nightstand and changed from my skirt to his boxers again. Then I got back into bed and waited for him to come out.

It was a strange feeling, wondering if I had a boyfriend, or if I was engaged, or if we weren’t together at all. It left me antsy and downright twitchy. The waiting was agony, then he finally walked out of his bathroom. His hair was wet and he was drying it with a towel. He was only in boxers. Dangerous, really. He tossed the towel on the floor and sat next to me.

“Are you doing okay?” I asked as I turned the ring on my ringer.

He scratched his head. “Not sure yet.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No. There’s nothing to say. You saw me almost kill a person. I’m still surprised you agreed to stay with me last night.”

I shrugged. “I’d be a lousy friend if I ditched you after that.”

His eyebrow went up, and I got the impression Nickolas was onto me. “Friend?”

Another shrug. “Um, well what would you call it?”

He pulled me onto his lap, and held my knees at his sides. Then he looked at my ring finger before he looked back up at me. “Posey, were my intentions not made abundantly clear by now? You are my mate and there’s nothing you can do about that.”

I smiled but it was short lived. “And the, the ring? What was that for?”

His smile was brighter than mine. “Well, it started as a replacement for the one you sent back. Did you want it to mean something else?”

“No,” I said, not sure if it was a lie or not. “I was just wondering.”

He nodded. “I’m marrying you, Cupcake. If you’d like to call it an engagement ring, you can. Or I can get you another.”

“No more rings. Don’t buy me things that cost as much as the down payment on a car.”

“You’re lucky I don’t buy you more. I’d spoil you rotten if you’d let me. When we’re officially married, you can’t stop me.”

My nose twitched. “I’m not even eighteen yet, Nickolas. We’re too young to be talking about getting married.” I narrowed my eyes. “Or making puppies.”

He pretended to pout. “You don’t wanna make puppies with me?”

“Seventeen,” I said again. “I need to be sure—” I stopped. What I was going to say would have hurt him. It was another fear I just couldn’t shake for the life of me. “This is just so new. All of it. I don’t know how to love someone. And I don’t know how to accept someone loving me back.”

There was nothing but understanding on his face. “I know. I told you that I’m going to do my very best to make you feel loved.” He rubbed my hips and I stared at the ring on my finger, that could mean anything I wanted it to mean.

“I just want this to work,” I whispered. “I don’t want to be all alone anymore.”

He pulled my face to his, and kissed me slowly. My hands were on his chest, and his left my face for my hips.

Not enough.

I moved against him until I got a reaction out of him. When he held me tighter, I maneuvered it so that he was on top of me. I laid my head on his pillow, adjusting until he fell between my legs.

Nickolas looked at me with questioning eyes. “Cupcake… what are we doing?” I smiled and started getting his boxers off of him. They hit the floor before he said another word. “You’re sure you wanna do this?”

I nodded. “I trust you. With everything.”

His eyes held relief. “I’m going to take care of you forever.”

“I know.”

He pulled my shirt over my head, and laid me back down. Nickolas’ lips made their way down to my bra when I searched for something on the nightstand.

“What are you doing?” he asked with his mouth against my skin.

I held an iPod up so he could see it. “I’m putting on music. Aren’t you supposed to play music for something like this?”

Nickolas chuckled at me, shaking his head as he sighed. “If you’d like. Do you want me to wait till you pick something out?”

“Nope,” I said as I scrolled through music. “Go about your business.”

“All right then. Just be careful what you pick. I imagine it’ll kill the mood if the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse theme comes on.” He moved down my body and I kept trying to find something good.

I didn’t notice the boxers were off of me until he was going for the panties under them. Then I fumbled to put the iPod down. We didn’t need music. Music was stupid anyway. Fuck music.

After Nickolas tossed my boxers to the floor, he looked up at me from my thighs. “No music?”

I shook my head, because words were not my friend right now.

He smiled, and I lay down flat on the bed. My heart hit my ribcage when he moved up again, dragging his lips along my skin as he went. I lost the ability to breathe evenly within only a minute or so. I felt his nails bite into my thigh at the same time I reached for the sheets so I could have something to hold onto. His hair was an option but I wasn’t sure I could do it without hurting him.

Teasing me, Nickolas kissed the inside of my thigh, letting me feel the tip of his tongue so very close to where I wanted it to be. He made me wait, inching closer and closer to my center. When he finally got there, I gasped, and he laughed at me. If I hadn’t been seeing new and pretty colors, I might have smacked him.

Nickolas’ hands gripped my legs, yanking me closer to him as I bit into my lip. I used my hand to brace myself against the backboard, trying to damn hard not to be as loud as I wanted to. I worried for the claw marks I would put in his bed, but it was beyond my control at that point.

I panted his name, and almost ripped the sheets off of the bed with my free hand. Nickolas pulled at me with his lips, alternating between that, and using his tongue. At some point, I gave up on the being quiet thing.

I pulled at his hair, needing more than this. As wonderful as it felt, the burning wouldn’t stop until he was inside of me. Nickolas got the hint, and left a kiss on my thigh before he lay over me. His hands went behind my back so he could work the bra off of me. With heavy breaths, he said, “Eager?”

I moved my hips up, feeling him pressed against me. “A little. You?”

“A little.” He proved himself a liar when he put his face to my neck, avoiding ending my torture. I wiggled under him, going as far as to put my leg around him so that it was more than clear what I wanted. Nickolas didn’t take the bait.

I huffed, and tried not to kill the boy I loved. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were trying to put this off.”

Nickolas stopped to look down at me. “Why would you think that?”

I stared.

To kill me, or something, Nickolas pushed forward against me. He didn’t slip inside of me, but he rubbed right against my already sensitive center. My nails bit at the flesh on his arms.

“I’ve never been anyone’s first,” Nickolas explained. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Never?”

He smiled. “Of course that’s the part you focus on.”

Not the time and place but… “Well I know you’ve been with a lot of girls… I guess I’m just surprised.”

The smile turned crooked. “Cupcake, let’s think about this logically. I’ve been a father for almost five years. Most of my life is taking care of my sister. How much time do you think I had for girls?” He moved back down to my body and his mouth started moving to my chest, kissing me while I thought it over.

“I don’t know,” I said, still quiet. “Mona said you were with a lot.”

Nickolas’ lips pulled away from my breast so he could speak. “Mona doesn’t know. Do you want me to tell you?”

We were just about to sleep together. Did it matter? “Yeah.”

I couldn’t tell if he was looking at me with frustration or adoration. “Including you.” He smiled brightly, then touched the tip of my nose.

My eyes widened. “Wow. No fucking way.”

“No fucking. You’re correct on that.”

I might have let my mouth hang open a little too long, making me look like a dope. “But… you’re so hot.”

“I’m aware, thanks. I just didn’t have the time, didn’t find anyone I liked, and I had better things to do. Why would I waste my time with girls that didn’t matter, when I could be here with one that does?”

I shouldn’t have felt as fucking ecstatic as I did, but oh well. “All of this is utterly delightful. Cake is the only thing that can make it better. Why aren’t you as happy for me as I am?”

He shrugged. “I very much would like to continue with our activities. Can we?”

I nodded and made him kiss me again. “I love you,” I told him when our lips broke apart.

“I love you too, Posey.” His lips went back to mine.

Nickolas’ hand held my thigh as he slowly pushed into me. I winced at the pressure, trying to think past it. He stopped halfway, giving me some time to get used to him. When I nodded, Nickolas slid the rest of the way into me.

He moved with me slowly, carefully. His lips found mine periodically, and when they did, I laced my fingers into his hair. He told me he loved me. A lot.

I pulled his body closer to mine, our skin warm with the friction. I held on tight, needing something to ground me to reality. He was at my ear speaking low to me. When he married that with a strong thrust forward, it evoked happy a noise from me. I held him close to me as he repeated the motion.

I hit my crescendo just before he did. I panted for breath with him as he slowly moved off of me. Then he pulled me to his chest. I laid my head on him as his chest moved up and down at a fast pace. His fingertips brushed along my back as I laid my hand beside my face.

I looked up at him. “I—it was okay, right?”

He laughed. “You’re adorable for thinking it was possible for it not to be great.” He tilted my chin up and gave me a quick kiss. “You were perfect.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you liked it.”

“I’d ask if you liked it too, but I already know.”

I smacked him lightly. “You’re so arrogant.”

He half shrugged. “Did you expect anything else? I listened to you moaning my name almost an hour. It can inflate a man’s ego.”

I lay there, satisfied with that explanation. Then I stared at the ring on my finger that I was just realizing was another way for him to claim me. But I was okay with it. I was his. He was mine. We were even.

***

I threw on one of Nickolas’ shirts after it became a ridiculous notion to stay naked any longer. He didn’t agree with me, so he was under the covers. I snuggled up to his side as we watched a movie.

Nickolas kept leaning down randomly, kissing me everywhere he could reach. We missed the second half of the movie when he decided to up his game by threatening/promising to do things very inappropriate things with The Little Mermaid on in the background. Then I decided that I needed to be on top of him, so I took care of that.

He was big enough that I could literally just lay on him and have plenty of room. I folded my arms in front of me and set my chin on them. And he very sweetly decided that his hands needed to be on my ass.

“So,” I started. “What are we telling the kid?”

He smiled. “That Mommy finally admitted she loved Daddy.”

I tapped my fingers on him. “Funny. But do we need to explain to her anything? Like why I keep sleeping over.”

“Like why you’re going to keep sleeping over?”

I felt my expression sadden. “I wish I could, Nicky, but my foster parents aren’t gonna keep letting me take off and not come back for days on end. Social Services checks up on that kind of stuff.”

He thought. “You’re nearly eighteen. Two months or so. I’ll be eighteen in a week. I think we can work this out. I don’t know if you know this about me, but I’m quite wealthy.”

I huffed. “Yeah, I know. That was almost a deal breaker, so don’t get cocky.”

“I’m just saying, you can I can get a place to live. We can bring Dolly. You can let me get you pregnant and we can raise our little pups in bliss.”

I shook my head. “Can you once just call them babies?”

“Babies.” He kissed the tip of my nose. “Happy?”

“I am. And you just reminded me that I need to get you something for your birthday.”

“Marry me.”

“Ha.”

“Not kidding. I want you to marry me.”

I popped up and held my hand as his side to stay up. “…huh?”

He flipped us and I was on my back. “Posey Dae, will you marry me?”

I was pretty sure I wasn’t breathing. “You’re proposing to me, naked, right after I lost my virginity to you? You really don’t waste time.”

“Nah. And since you didn’t seem to understand what the ring was the first time around, I thought I’d made it official.”

“We’re—”

“I know. I know how old we are. But I feel like the kind of lives we’ve led, sped up our development. I understand that it’s not the same for a fae, but my kind mate for life. The second I was mated to you, in my head and my soul, we were just as married as we ever would be.”

“Then why do you need our names on a piece of paper?”

“Because I want you be linked with you in every way I can be. I want you to be my wife and my mate and my partner.”

This was it, him wanting to make it official. Doing what no one else ever wanted to do. This was him declaring to the world, more than him wanting to keep me. He just wanted me.

I nodded. “I’ll marry you.”

He kissed me before he said anything else. “Saturday. How does that sound?”

“I’m still underage.”

“True. So we’re waiting till June.”

“Or, we could actually give ourselves time to figure everything out. Like where we’ll live, how we get Kim to give us Dahlia, how to take care of the psycho who thinks I’m his mate.”

He sat up, and I got a full view of his magnificent body before he grabbed his boxers from the floor. He got off of the bed, and then threw a shirt on after. “I think I should just go kill him now. Thank you for reminding me.”

I hopped off the bed and grabbed his arm. “No. Not going in without a plan, Nickolas.”

He stilled. “Dahlia needs to be picked up in an hour.” He rubbed his hands down his face. “I don’t know what to do about her. Nash’s menagerie still wants her. If I die doing this, I don’t have anyone to protect her.”

I hit his arm. “You’re not going to die. And I know I’m not strong like you are, but I’d die to keep her safe.”

“I know, Cupcake. But admit that you don’t have the means to keep a four-year-old safe all on your own.”

“Fine, I concede to that. We just need to call Icarus and see if he can help us. You can go through your mom’s stuff and I can get Dahlia when it’s time.”

We both dressed and went to the storage room. It was still a mess, but Nickolas gave me more clothes to wear. No need for Kim to come home and instantly know I screwed her stepson. She might say something rude. And I might have to hit her. Then go and screw her stepson again. A couple times.

I changed into a blue dress and sat on Nickolas’ lap as we both went through files, looking for anything useful. It was mostly a lot of useless documents about a house that wasn’t owned by the Weavers anymore, cars, office spaces. We just weren’t finding it and I was terrified.

I got Dahlia from daycare and took her back home alone. I watched her and Scully play in the backyard, both animals. Nickolas wouldn’t take a break. I asked him to come out with us and he was hardly able to do more than mumble.

We ordered pizza for dinner and Dahlia wanted to go to bed early. She got worn out on the days she was a coyote. She snuggled up to Scully in bed and was out before I even had the light off.

Nickolas was putting the boxes we’ve been through in the corner of the room. He was down to two. I didn’t know what we would do after that.

We were in trouble.