Hold me like you've never lost patience
By the time Deanna returned, Daniel and the kids were already back. The encounter with Frank had given her a sense of well-being despite the past. She walked in smiling.
"Where were you?" her husband asked.
"I went to have a drink with a friend... It was nice, I hadn't done that in a long time," she replied cheerfully.
For Deanna, it was the most normal thing, for Daniel, not so much.
"What friend?"
"Frank, do you remember?" she said, sitting next to him.
"The guy from college? The one who cheated on you?"
Something in his tone didn't sit well with Deanna.
"Yes, that one..."
"And why?"
"He called me this morning, he wanted to talk... He's getting married next month."
"The messages from last night were from him. You said you didn't recognize the number," and again that hint of distrust slipped into his voice.
"And I didn't."
Deanna had honed her patience and temperament. She knew that tone and those ways of Daniel, and that's why she had put a lot of effort into learning to calm him, to calm herself, and not to clash like in the past. The way she spoke to him when she noticed his agitation was similar to when she explained something to Jonathan.
"What did he want? I don't understand why you saw him."
"He had things to close with me, from our time together. It was interesting to listen to him, we remembered a lot..."
Daniel stood up. He too had learned quite a bit about his demons and how to silence them; but sometimes a tiny and weak voice would scream in the back of his head. And now it was screaming uncontrollably.
"What's wrong?" Deanna asked.
"Nothing..." He was visibly upset.
His jealousy could be endearing, but also hurtful. It all depended on how she handled it and how he expressed it.
"Why are you angry? It's been so long since then..."
"I'm not angry... Just upset... I'm sorry."
"Come, don't leave," she said, touching the couch cushion. And Daniel came back.
"I'm sorry, Deanna... I..."
"Yes, I know. That's why I don't hide anything from you, not that there was anything to hide. I knew if I told you, you might get upset, but I trust you."
Daniel looked at her with a slightly red face, from jealousy or shame. That "I trust you" was a small reminder of his own sins, his mistakes. An affirmation that, despite them, Deanna had decided to bet on what they felt.
"No one will want me with this belly," she said, trying to dissipate the tension.
"That's what you think... You don't know how beautiful you look now... I can't be the only one who notices."
"Do you think so? Maybe you see me that way because these two are your daughters?"
Of course, that had a lot to do with it. He felt proud of his family. He felt proud of the woman he had chosen to accompany him in life and her strength.
Just like patience, trust intertwines with love. It builds over time and creates a space where we feel safe and can be ourselves. It helps us leave behind fears and doubts, gives us the ability to withstand challenges and overcome obstacles.
Love and trust are not static; they require constant attention and mutual effort. To maintain trust, it's crucial to be honest, even when it's hard for the other person. Daniel and Deanna did this every day.
Throughout their relationship and marriage, Daniel and Deanna had faced numerous challenges together. It wasn't always easy, and there were moments when honesty revealed painful truths. But both understood that the only way to stay together was through transparency. They knew that avoiding difficult conversations would only create invisible distances that, over time, would take their toll.
Everything that had distanced them was always related to distrust: Daniel's uncontrollable jealousy, Deanna's self-doubt and her "worthiness" to be by his side; those sown by others' interests and, on some occasions, those forged to try to care and protect.
And that's why now they made sure there was always space for the truth. They knew this didn't mean agreeing on everything, but rather creating an environment where both could express their thoughts and emotions without fear of rejection or misunderstanding. The path to get there was long and winding, but don't we bet more eagerly when the person beside us gives their all?
Daniel hugged her, hugged her tightly. His essence would always be latent beneath his skin, but their relationship was more important than his insecurities. She opened her heart and showed him her world as it was, she didn't hide, she didn't hold anything back, and he was grateful for that, feeling his own insecurities begin to fade, at least for that moment.