CHAPTER 5
THE WEDDING
— The engagement
Engagement is an important pre-wedding function in almost all religions. When there is an engagement in Hindus, both boys and girls wear rings in each other’s fingers. On this occasion, the main members of both the boy and the girl’s family are present. On this occasion, turban is tied to the elders of the house. Clothes are exchanged between the two families. Everyone is fed sweets. All give each other gifts. On the occasion of engagement, Khushboo and her future husband took blessings of all elders.
— Mehandi program
This program is done according to the auspicious time. On this occasion, Mehandi was applied to the hands and feet of Sajan’s sister. Women from home and neighborhood sing traditional songs on this program. The woman who applies mehandi on Sajan’s sister’s hand is given money and sweets.
— Women’s Music Festival
On this occasion, women from home and neighborhood dance to music. This is a happy occasion. Traditionally, the women of the neighborhood started playing dholak and harmonium on this occasion. Some women also sang songs. Almost all the women danced. This festival created an atmosphere of happiness in the entire house.
— Turmeric Festival
On this day, mehandi is applied to the body of both the boy and the girl. Women usually do the work of applying mehandi. Turmeric is considered auspicious in Indian traditions. This turmeric is also known as ubtan in many places. The ceremony of applying turmeric was done by the ladies of the house and the neighbors of Sajan.
— Bindoli
Bindoli is traditionally extracted in the evening. In this, both the boy and the girl are seated on a mare and roamed all over the village. On this day, the boy wears a sherwani. The girl wears a saree. Children – old – young, boys – girls all participate in Bindoli. On this day, musical instruments are played which play the song. Traditional and modern – all kinds of songs are played. Many people dance on these songs. Almost the entire village participates in this program. This is the most important day apart from the wedding day. On this day everyone celebrates happiness.
— The wedding day
On this day, the boy sits on a mare and comes to the girl’s house to get married. A procession also accompanies the boy. The wedding pavilion is tied up at the girl’s house. The pavilion can be built in many ways. In Khushboo’s wedding, the pavilion was tied with banana trees. “Havan vedi” is made just below this pavilion. In Khushboo’s wedding, “Havan vedi” was made with brick and soil. In this “Havan vedi” dry wood and cow dung are added.
When the boy came to Khushboo’s house to marry her, he was first fed sweet rice. After this, both the boy and the girl were placed in the pavilion. The pandit is already present there.
Many materials are used for havan. Some of the main ingredients are the following:
Roli, Akshat, Kalawa, Betel nut, Cloves, Paan, Cardamom, Red Cloth, Sandalwood, Vermilion, Tulsi leaf, Banana leaf, camphor, Ghee, Rui, Turmeric, Dhoopbatti, Mango wood, Sesame, Barley, Sugar etc.
First of all, Khushboo and her future husband garlanded each other. Then both sat in the pavilion. Pandit started reciting marriage mantras. A fire was lit in the “Havan vedi”. The boy and the girl took 7 rounds of that fire. The boy put vermilion in demand for Khushboo. The boy put Mangalasutra around Khushboo’s neck.
In this way, Khushboo got married. Now the baraatis were served food. About 5000 guests had come to Khushboo’s wedding. Everyone was fed food.
7. Farewell
Farewell is an emotional moment in which the newly married bride departs from home. While leaving the house, tears came in Khushboo’s eyes. She throws five handfuls of rice on her head while walking out the door of the house. Khushboo leaves her house weeping.
— When Khushboo went to her in-laws, the boy’s family also did many programs. The first reception ceremony was held. In this people were invited to the feast.
— Blessing ceremony was held. In this ceremony, elders give blessings to the newly married couple. It is attended by the family and relatives of the bride and groom. Sweets and gifts are given to the newly married couple.