Chapter 21 Chapter Twenty-One - Jartre
I’m coming up on my 2000th lap and yet the rage burning through me refuses to dissipate. I swim to the edge of the plunge pool and lay my arms on the side. I watch the fountain that runs along the edge of the pool, cascade over the side hypnotically while a storm whirls around me, darkening the skies as the palm trees on my estate fight to stay rooted to the earth. Another bolt of lightning rips through the sky in a violent fury as Gabriella’s words echo hauntingly in my mind.
Just like me, she was betrayed. Deceived by someone she let into her heart and her home. It enrages me to admit it, but at least Oshmin never fucking gloated about what he did, and though I’ll never say it out loud, he was an unwitting participant in Apaki’s deception. But that… that vile, insignificant excuse for a human just stood in that hallway bragging about her sins. She threw them at Gabriella intending to wound her. A brief glimpse into her mind revealed enough of her depravity to me, and if it weren’t for Gabriella holding my arms, I’d have ripped her head from her body and painted the streets with her entrails. She was going out of her way to antagonise my animai. She wanted to hurt her, but Gabriella is a force to be reckoned with. Not once was she fazed by that whore’s words. Annoyed, yes, but she was far more concerned about me. She gave better than she got, and seeing that harlot become infuriated because she didn’t get what she wanted, was only mildly satisfactory.
During every stroke of my swim, I contemplated the best way to make this neighbour pay for her evil deeds and I think I know just the punishment. With a malevolent smile on my face, I swim to the other side of the pool, exiting it only to come face to face with the fuchsia-haired goddess herself, her silver eyes staring up at me with compassion.
“I had hoped that time with your animai would improve your mood, not cause thunderstorms that leave meteorologists scratching their heads,” she says disappointedly.
“Time with my animai did improve my mood. Learning her ex-boyfriend had been cheating on her for an extended period of time, however, soured said mood,” I sneer, pushing past her and making my way into the house, leaving a trail of water behind me.
I hear her sigh as she follows behind me. “I can see how that would touch a nerve. How is she?” she asks, that compassion once again clear in her voice.
I take a deep breath, leaning my hands against the back of the sofa. “Handling it far better than me. She doesn’t seem to care,” I say incredulously.
“Yet you care.”
“In the short time I’ve known her, it is clear beyond a shadow of a doubt just how amazing she is. So much so that I can’t fathom why you would give her to me of all people. Amazing enough for me to know that she deserves to be worshipped, not used, and betrayed by some unevolved troglodyte,” I growl in frustration, the sofa’s wooden backing bursting from my grip.
“Well,” she says, unfazed by the destruction of my sofa as she comes to stand beside me with a bright smile on her face. “Sounds to me like things are off to a fabulous start.” She lays her hand on my shoulder, “I’m glad you see how special she is,” she says with a warm smile. That reminds me, I promised I’d get Gabriella some answers.
“Speaking of special, just what do you mean by that?” I ask suspiciously.
“Just that it takes a special kind of woman to handle you,” she chuckles.
I cross my arms over my chest. “And this has nothing to do with the fact she’s a human who has visions?” I ask pointedly.
Her smile falters and she stops short. “She what?”
I look at her, carefully assessing her. Her surprise seems genuine. So she didn’t know about Gabriella’s gift before she paired us.
“Gabriella has visions. They only come to her through her dreams, and she has no idea why she has this gift and frankly, neither do I. I’ve never known a human to possess supernatural abilities.”
Zarseti looks lost in thought, and the moment I try to peer into her mind I notice it’s completely closed to me, protected by an impenetrable wall. There’s something she doesn’t want me to know.
“I honestly had no idea she possessed a gift of any kind but knowing that she does makes a great deal of sense,” she says, nodding thoughtfully.
“And why does that make sense?”
“That I cannot say,” she says evasively.
“You know something and you’re not telling me,” I say accusingly, feeling my jaw tick as my already enraged state continues to bubble away inside me.
“Jartre, I know many things and never tell you. This is no different. Just know that there is nothing wrong with her and she is exactly who she is meant to be,” she says with a reassuring smile, yet I don’t feel reassured.
“Those visions cause her migraines, Zarseti. Debilitating migraines. If they are affecting her quality of life, then something is very wrong and I demand to know what,” I say in a low, threatening voice as I take a step towards her.
She frowns, “The visions cause her pain?”
“Yes.” She contemplates my words, still keeping me from penetrating her thoughts and making me angrier by the second. “Can I rid her of the visions?”
She shakes her head, “These visions are as a part of her as her own genetic code. You mustn’t go tampering with this,” she says in warning.
Lightning strikes around my estate as I lose my composer. “She is in pain! You would have me do nothing while she suffers?!”
Zarseti reaches out, placing a hand on my chest; a wave of calm coming over my body like a fast-acting sedative.
“Even though your bond is incomplete, her pain already pains you,” she says with a kind smile, “It warms my heart to see how you care for her. You don’t need to remove her gift to ease her pain, and you know this. Just be present and care for her, and when you are bonded, the bond should do the rest.”
“I promised I’d try to get her some answers. How can I call myself a God if I return to her with nothing?” I spit venomously, not entirely sure of who the venom is intended for.
Zarseti smiles kindly. “You promised to try, and you did. She’ll appreciate that you kept your word. You never guaranteed her answers, only effort. Don’t be so hard on yourself,” she says comfortingly.
“You can’t give me anything? Anything at all?” I almost beg.
She looks at me in thought, silence stretching between us before she speaks again. “Tell her she’ll have her answers soon enough. She just needs to be patient a little longer.”
“…Are you fucking kidding me?! You want me to give her that cryptic bullshit?!”
“It is the only answer I can offer you. Take it or leave it,” she shrugs before disappearing.
I let out a thunderous roar that has the sky opening and the ground shaking. My chest heaves, my body trembles and electricity travels around my fists and up my arms. As I feel the anger building to a crescendo, Gabriella’s tranquil glacial minty eyes appear in my mind. Her sweet smile fills her face and slowly I feel the intensity of my rage begin to wane. For the longest time, my anger has been my only true companion. My anger and my misery. Once upon a time it nearly destroyed this earth and I did what I had to, to put a stop to it, but those dark feelings never left me.
For thousands of years I have maintained a reasonable amount of control over my destructive coping tools, yet always lacking any true motivation to overcome them. Until now. Now as I stand in my living room, its vast size filling the air with silence as I prepare to unleash my fury on the surrounding property, it’s the thought of that sweet human that manages to keep the storm inside me at bay. The way she slept in my arms last night, gracing me with her smile, her trust, and her compassion. Just the memory of her is enough to give me pause. This morning she saw a glimmer of the rage that lives within me, and instead of recoiling or looking upon me in fear, she held onto me. She sought to brave the danger just to comfort me. No one has ever done that for me before. No one has ever cared the way she did.
I look down at my hands as the static slowly begins to dissipate, and as the build-up inside me dies down, I find myself feeling emotionally drained. I’m a fucking God, and yet all it takes is painful reminders of my past to zap myself of energy. With a deep sigh, I make my way up the left staircase and walk down the long hallway to my bedroom. With a wave of my hand, the thick curtains are drawn, blocking out all sources of light as I flop onto the bed, burying my head in my pillows. I’m painfully aware that they lack the soothing scent of bubble gum and cream sickle that I was blessed to experience all of last night on Gabriella’s toy-sized bed. Suddenly my own room feels painfully austere.