Maya
After what happened, I haven’t left the house in the last couple of days. I will have to go out tonight, though, because I have my first self-defence class. Conrad’s mom is coming with me. It is better than going by myself. Conrad is away at work. I feel like he is keeping something from me; call it a gut feeling. I can’t work out what it is. It has been stressing me out, but I haven’t asked him about it in case I am being paranoid. My mind is a mess.
I have spent my morning in a daze. I need to snap out of it. I sigh and pull my ass from the sofa. I go downstairs to collect the mail but am on edge the entire time. I didn’t want to get back to this stage where I was so fearful. I thought I had got by it, but when I realised how easily Callum could get to me if he tried, it was a reality check, and I couldn’t help but be scared. If I stay in, at least he won’t get to me.
I flipped through the mail on the way back up; most of it was for Conrad. I don’t get much mail. I didn’t give this address out to anyone except important things, which stopped me from getting junk mail as much. The last one I see has my name written on it. It is a brown envelope with the name and address handwritten. The postage stamp is local. I have no idea what it could be.
I head back inside, locking up behind me and making sure the security system is on again for the third time in the last hour. God, I am frustrated at myself. I am not the scared, weak person I was six months ago. I will be fine! I will make sure of it.
I set Conrad’s mail aside and tossed mine on the sofa, pouring some more coffee before taking a seat to open it. It feels light. It is probably something useless that belongs in the bin. I take a sip of my coffee and set it down, picking the envelope up. I didn’t recognise the writing.
I tear it open and see two sheets of paper in it. I slide them out and read the top one. The second I started reading, I knew who it was from, Callum!
Hey, baby doll,
Did you really think I couldn’t contact you because I no longer have your number? I know where you live, remember? Since I couldn’t get you when I tried the other day, I thought I would write you a little letter.
Did your perfect, rich boyfriend tell you about the 30k he sent me? I assume not because you would have done the stupid thing and talked him out of it if he did. I bet you thought he didn’t keep secrets from you, uh? You should ask him about the videos and photos I sent him. I am sure he enjoyed watching them. Though I am sure he wasn’t happy seeing you being fucked by another man, I don’t care. I don’t care about him.
You are probably reading this and thinking to yourself that I am lying to try and cause trouble, but I am not. If you look at what else is in the envelope, the proof of the transaction is it. It makes me wonder how much more I could get from him. What do you think, Maya? How much are you really worth to him? I guess not much, but I may have to take whatever I can get from him.
I will be in touch soon. I have thought long and hard, and I plan to give you one more chance to make things right. Keep an eye on your mail, baby doll.
Callum
God, could he be any more arrogant and annoying? He is nothing but an idiot. He must be lying because Conrad wouldn’t do something like that behind my back. He would have told me if Callum sent such videos to him.
But what if he is telling the truth? Does that mean he has sex tapes of us together? I did not agree to those, like that matters to him. I start to panic, and a sick feeling takes over the same way it did when he sent me those photos. My heart starts to race, and I open the other sheet of paper with shaky hands.
I whimper when I see it. It is proof of a bank transaction from Conrad to Callum. How could he not tell me about something like this? I have the right to know. I toss the sheets of paper away and dart to the bathroom. I drop to my knees in front of the pan and start being sick, the tears rolling down my cheeks as I do.
I need to know what Callum sent him! And what has Conrad done with them? Did he hand them into the police? Get rid of them? Has he hidden them somewhere? I assume if it was photos and videos, they must have been sent to him either through email or a flash drive. Is this what he has been hiding from me, and how has he seemed distracted over the last couple of days?
Once I stop being sick, I sit up and rest against the wall. I sob on the floor. When will all of this end? And what did he mean he would give me one last chance to make things right? What fucking else can he possibly take from me?
I lean my head against the wall and close my eyes, taking a few deep breaths. I need to talk to Conrad, but he is in meetings most of the day. I will be away before he arrives home. He needs to be open and honest with me. Callum is obviously trying what he can to come between Conrad and me. I refuse to let him, but I am mad at Conrad right now for lying to me. He probably did it to protect me, but he should not have kept it from me.
I scream in frustration before I jump to my feet and head back through. I go towards the living room but then change my mind. I rush to the bedroom and start looking through all the drawers, and anywhere he could have hidden whatever Callum sent him. I didn’t find anything but soon found myself on a mission. I searched the entire place high and low, including his home office, to see if there was anything, but I couldn’t find anything unusual.
I fall to the floor in his office, defeated. There is no worse feeling than what I am feeling right now. I take a little time before I clean up the mess I have made. If there is something, he has either kept it at his office or handed it to the police station. The idea of other people seeing me so vulnerable makes me feel sick once again. I don’t want strangers to see me like that! I can’t stop worrying that Callum will release them to the world. I don’t know how I would deal with it or how I would come back from it. I would run, change my name and never let anyone near me again. I hope it doesn’t come to such a thing, but it may be possible with Callum.
After I get the place back to normal, I crawl into bed and hide under the covers. I will stay here for the rest of the day. I may cancel my class later, too. I don’t want Conrad’s mom to pick up on something being wrong. The fewer people who know about the money and videos, the better.