Chapter 68 up
Selina did not realize when observation had become a habit.
At first, it was subtle. A glance held too long. A pause before Adrian answered her questions. The way his attention drifted toward something that was not in front of him.
Now, it was constant.
She watched him even when he was not speaking. Especially when he was not speaking.
Silence, she had learned, revealed more than words.
They were sitting across from each other at the dining table. Morning light fell through the tall windows, painting soft rectangles across the floor. Adrian was scrolling through his tablet, his expression neutral, unreadable.
Selina stirred her coffee, though she had already stirred it three times.
She did not drink it.
“Are you busy today?” she asked, her voice carefully neutral.
Adrian didn’t look up immediately.
“Yes,” he said. “Meetings.”
The word was vague. Deliberately vague.
She nodded, pretending it was enough.
It wasn’t.
“With whom?”
It came out softer than she intended.
Adrian finally looked up. Not defensive. Not angry.
Just tired.
“Work,” he said.
Work.
The word had become a wall between them.
Selina forced a small smile, the kind that existed only to maintain peace.
“Of course,” she said.
He watched her for a moment, as if he knew she was asking something else. As if he knew she was not brave enough to say it.
He returned to his tablet.
The conversation ended.
But the question did not.
—
Later that afternoon, Selina found herself standing in front of Adrian’s office.
She had not planned to come here.
Her body had simply moved, guided by something she could not fully control.
The door was slightly open.
She could hear voices inside.
Adrian’s voice.
And another voice.
Vanesa.
Selina froze.
She had heard Vanesa speak before. Her voice was calm, precise. It carried a quiet confidence that did not need to demand attention.
Now, hearing it in this space—Adrian’s space—felt different.
More intimate.
More dangerous.
“…we don’t have much time,” Vanesa was saying.
“I know,” Adrian replied.
His voice was lower than usual.
Quieter.
Selina stepped closer, her breath shallow.
“You don’t have to do this alone,” Vanesa said.
The words struck something deep inside Selina.
Adrian didn’t answer immediately.
“I’m used to it,” he said finally.
Used to being alone.
Selina’s chest tightened.
Vanesa spoke again. “You shouldn’t be.”
Silence followed.
Not empty silence.
Heavy silence.
The kind that existed between two people who understood each other without explanation.
Selina’s fingers curled at her sides.
She knew she should leave.
She didn’t.
She stayed, listening to something she was never meant to hear.
—
Inside the office, Adrian leaned back slightly, his gaze distant.
Vanesa stood near the desk, her posture steady.
She had always been steady.
“That’s not strength,” she said. “That’s isolation.”
He let out a quiet breath.
“Sometimes they look the same.”
Vanesa studied him carefully.
“You don’t have to carry everything alone anymore.”
He looked at her then.
Really looked at her.
There was something in his eyes.
Something fragile.
Something honest.
It lasted only a second.
But Selina saw it.
Through the small opening in the door.
She saw it.
And she understood.
Not fully.
But enough.
Enough to feel the ground shift beneath her.
—
Selina stepped back before they could see her.
Her heart was beating too fast.
Her mind was louder than her breathing.
She walked away quickly, each step uneven.
Her thoughts tangled together, forming conclusions she could not stop.
You don’t have to do this alone.
You don’t have to carry everything alone anymore.
Why didn’t he say those things to her?
Why did he allow Vanesa to see parts of him he kept hidden from her?
She had been there.
She had stayed.
She had loved him.
Hadn’t she?
The question formed before she could stop it.
Had she loved him in the way he needed?
Or had she loved the version of him that never showed weakness?
She didn’t know anymore.
And the not knowing terrified her.
—
That evening, Adrian returned home later than usual.
Selina was sitting on the couch, her hands folded in her lap.
She had not turned on the lights.
The room was dim, illuminated only by the faint glow of the city outside.
He paused when he saw her.
“You’re awake,” he said.
She nodded.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
He stepped inside, setting his keys down quietly.
For a moment, neither of them spoke.
There was a distance between them now.
Invisible.
But undeniable.
“Long day?” she asked.
“Yes.”
He did not elaborate.
She expected him to.
He didn’t.
She swallowed.
“I went to your office today.”
He froze.
Not dramatically.
Just enough for her to notice.
“Oh?”
She watched his face carefully.
“I didn’t go in,” she added.
He waited.
She waited.
Neither of them moved.
Neither of them said the thing that mattered.
“What did you need?” he asked.
Need.
The word felt sharp.
“I wanted to see you.”
The truth.
Simple.
Unprotected.
He nodded slowly.
“I was in meetings.”
She almost laughed.
The lie wasn’t complete.
But it wasn’t honest either.
“Yes,” she said softly. “You were.”
He looked at her then, as if he sensed the meaning beneath her words.
But he didn’t ask.
And she didn’t explain.
Fear held them both in place.
Fear of what truth would break.
—
Adrian walked past her toward the kitchen.
Selina watched him go.
He moved the same way he always had.
Calm.
Controlled.
Untouchable.
But now she knew that wasn’t entirely true.
She had seen him differently today.
Seen the version of him that allowed himself to be understood.
Just not by her.
That realization hurt more than anger ever could.
“Adrian.”