Chapter 60 Chapter 60: The Weight of Regret
Chapter 60: The Weight of Regret
Vishiea’s POV
I am too afraid to be alone again. Since my Dad and Mom passed away, I felt my world has no sense until I met Mother Kiara. And now that she also left for good in this world, I don't know where to start again.
Mother Kiara knows that she's the only one I have. I was so happy to be her daughter even though it only took us years to be together. I felt her love, her care, her guidance, and everything that a mother always does to their daughter.
“Anastasia,” I heard Dylan knocking on my door. I wiped my tears, smiled before opening the door. My eyes met his. I could read the sadness that's written on his face.
Mother Kiara is not just a mother. She's so generous and kind to everyone.
“What?” I asked him, trying to break the sadness in my heart. He faintly smiled and entered inside without my approval.
Well, he's always like that.
“I am here to check on you,” he uttered without looking at me. His gaze wandered around.
“It's quiet,” I heard him murmuring. I let out a deep sigh. When I was here we used to laugh and do crazy things sometimes. Dylan also often comes here teasing or irritating me. But now we can't even smile because of what happened. I feel like losing all my energy and I just wanted to stay here and not come out.
She even promised me when I came back, she would throw a party. I came back but it's not even a party. We gathered for her funeral.
I didn't even consider her condition before going to the kingdom. I feel like all the efforts I did became nothing.
“Yeah, the silence is killing…” I answered. He turned around and looked at me. He faintly smiled.
I am not used to this silence. Mother Kiara always does something to make me smile. She never wanted to see me like this.
He let out a deep sigh. It was only yesterday but it feels like it just happened earlier. I never expected this. I really thought we would see each other again.
“Mother Kiara told me, ‘She's so proud of you…’” he paused. I looked at him and when our eyes met I avoided his gaze, biting my bottom lip to prevent myself from crying.
I know, she's always saying she's proud of me. She always talks about how great I am. She kept on saying she's grateful that she met me.
I was walking in that place with nowhere to go. I tried to approach anyone I could see to seek help but every one of them declined. I was so helpless, I begged and kept on begging for help but their doors were closed.
That day, I lost hope. It was getting dark and I was afraid for my life.
I was walking, my hands were shaking and I couldn't even see my future that day. Not until someone stopped. All I thought was it’s someone who is willing to help me. I gained my confidence back but when the door opened I saw two men grinning at me.
I got so scared that I ran for my life. I thought they would leave me but I was wrong. They chased me. I had no other choice but to fight. They were strong but I was trained to fight.
That night, I chose to defend myself. Whether to die or stay alive. With all my might, I survived. I used all the training I had. It was rough, but it saved my life. I endured bruises and even cuts on my hands but I didn't choose to give up. I chose to continue, still hoping for help.
Until she approached me. Her face was angelic. Her smile was so bright and she looked kind. Yet the trauma didn't leave me. But she assured me no one could hurt me as long as she was alive.
That day, I found someone who was truly willing to love me despite everything I’ve been through. She didn't stop until I let my guard down and trusted her.
That day, I found another hope. I found Mother Kiara. Now that she's gone, I don't know what will happen to me. The pain is too much to handle.
“I just wish I could still see her alive… I just wish I never went to that stupid event… I– I just wish I never stayed there for too long… and if maybe I chose to stay here… maybe we would still be together.” I let out the tears that I’ve been preventing from falling.
“Anastasia,” he walked towards me and hugged me. I am drowned by regret right now.
“Hey, stop it. I know you're blaming yourself. But Mother Kiara doesn't want you to do that…” he comforted me, caressing my back while I kept on crying.
“I missed my mother's final days because of my stupidity, Dylan. Now tell me why should I not blame myself?!” I shouted at him. I just want to burst my anger because of my stupidity right now.
“Don't you ever say that to yourself, Anastasia. No one wanted what happened. She never blamed you for anything, she only wanted to see you happy. She wanted you to choose what makes you happy,” he uttered. We both sat on the couch while he wiped the tears on my face.
“Dylan, if I could only bring back the time. I would not leave here. Why does destiny always want to hurt me? Why does destiny always kill people I love?” I asked him. He didn't answer me.
“I fucking stayed there for revenge but fuck! This is what happened. I hate myself!” I can't help but torture myself for everything that happened.
“Anastasia, your mother told me something before she died,” he uttered. I immediately looked at him, wiped my tears and was ready to listen.
“What is it? Tell me Dylan, what did she tell you?” I held his hand. He faintly smiled.
“Your mother hoped you would choose love, not vengeance. That's the only thing she wished before dying,” he uttered. I was silent. Even in her last breath, she always thought of me.
Oh, mother. I miss you and I love you so much.