Sam stared at Selena as if she was crazy. His brain was running furiously round his skull at that moment. He couldn’t actually believe what she had just told him. Selena had called him on the phone that morning, telling him she wanted to tell him they needed to talk. Thinking she was just bored and needed someone to talk to, he had told her he would come over whenever he was free in the bar but when she had told him it was something very urgent and she couldn’t wait any longer for her to tell him, he had rushed down to her house.
Now listening to her, he was displeased with what she had told him. He stared at her for a long moment, thinking hard…….his mind deliberating. She’s just a child, he told himself. Go easy on her. She couldn’t possibly believe her own words, so go easy on her.
“My child,” Sam began, heaving heavily. “I’ve you really thought about what you’ve just said to me? I mean, do you really understand the gravity of what you are saying?” His eyes were still regarding her searchingly, wondering if she was right in her head.
Selena drew in a long, slow breath, and licked her lips with her tongue.
“Dad,” she began. “I’ve really thought about this. And I can assure you, nothing seems so good as this idea of mine. I mean look around us, in this town,” she was staring hard at him now. “No man comes close to Caesar in anything. Every man in this town fears him and every woman wants him. Let’s not forget this man has proved himself to be worthy of any woman in this town. I believe I’m lucky he’s shown interest in me. I think I will marry him.” she finished, and Sam could detect the wavering conviction in her voice. She was not really happy with her decision. He thought. She just felt this was the best thing to do. A bile of anger and disappointment rose in him and he could not hold himself back.
“Selena, I won’t let you get involved with Caesar,” he seethed out. “You don’t even love this man. You just want to get married to him because every woman in the town wants him. That’s crazy,”
“Fine! I don’t love him. I know that for a fact,” she admittedly painfully. “But I can……can learn to love him. People do that right? Learn to love someone. It’s not something difficult or is it?”
Sam grinned at her scornfully.
“You little girl. You don’t know jack about love. You think it’s that easy right? Learning to love someone? my God! When did you come up with that Selena? Who put all this crazy stuff into your head,” he was looking at her the way you will look at a child that needs a good spanking “You don’t even know what you are talking about. You’ve never been in love before. You don’t even know what love looks like. And yet, you dare talk about love?” He sighed. “But don’t worry, I will help you. And that’s why I say you ain’t getting married to Caesar. I won’t allow it, Selena. I’m sorry.”
A spark of anger jumped into Selena’s eyes.
“You won’t? But why dad? What has Caesar ever done to you? What as…….” But he raised his hands, cutting her off.
“You won’t understand,” Sam said through locked teeth. “You are too young for all this stuff. But I will make you understand one thing.” His old face, suddenly cold and hard, he pointed a finger at her now. “You are not getting married to Caesar. I will rather you blow my head clean off with that rusted sonofabitch shotgun of mine then let you get married to that shit heel.”
Selena stared at him for a long moment. Her beautiful face was darkened with fury and resentment. She had never felt so much anger towards Sam like this before and yet still, at that moment, she couldn’t help herself.
“Okay! Give me a very good reason why you don't want me to marry Caesar and I will call this whole thing off.” Selena said in a firm tone.
Sam lifted his eyebrows.
“What do you mean?” He asked, wondering where this suggestion of hers was heading to.
“I said, give me one reason, one good reason why you don’t want me with Caesar and we can forget this whole conversation.” she said tightly.
Sam licked his lips with his tongue.
“Caesar is not the man for you, Selena. You don’t know Caesar the way I do.” he finished as if that had answered any of her questions and anymore she might throw at him.
“Dad,” Selena gritted out. “Give me one goddamned reason why you don’t want me with Caesar. Just one!” Her voice was sharp and biting.
Sam winced.
He said simply. “I can’t say anything, child. But I don’t want you with that man. End of story.”
“Then in that case, I’m getting married to Caesar, ” Selena said simply.
“The hell you can,” Sam fired back. “If you so much as get married to that bloody killer and rap……..” then his mouth clamped shut and he turned his face away abruptly.
It was as if he had wanted to say something, then thought the better of it. Glancing at Selena, who eyed him suspiciously, he grunted, rose, and smoothly made his way to the bar. Pouring himself a stiff whisky, he swallowed it down, wincing at its burn. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he sighed deeply, feeling a sense of relief wash over him. Standing like a statue, his weathered face turned towards the ceiling, lost in troubled thoughts, Sam's demeanor was unsettling to Selena. She had never witnessed him like this before. Something was amiss, and she was determined to uncover the truth. He had almost spoken earlier, she recalled, but refrained himself. What was it that he had wanted to say? Watching his expression intently, she was convinced he was concealing something from her, and she was resolved to uncover the mystery.
She got to her feet and came over to where he stood.
“Dad,” she began gently. “What is it? What are you hiding? You know you are free to tell me anything. So what is it?”
Sam brought down his face to hers. He smiled but it wasn’t a nice one.
"I'm not telling you anything, Selena. Not a single thing," he said, stabbing her chest with his finger. "I see you're already infatuated with that psycho," he snarled. "You know me, Selena, I've always been kind to you. But it seems I've spoiled you silly," he added, ignoring the pain on Selena's face. "Yes, I've spoiled you. That's why the idea of marrying that baboon crossed your mind," he spat out the word. Pausing for a moment, he continued, "I want you to know I don't support your decision. Count me out. And if you go ahead with this plan, then good luck to you." With that, Sam stormed out, slamming the door behind him with a powerful force.
Selena watched him go and her throat turned dry……very dry. She fixed herself a drink, downing the drinks in gulps, her eyes becoming watery and red shot. She stood there for a long moment, her face lost in thoughts. Then she moved away from the bar and went to sit on the couch. Her throat still felt dry.