DAY 10.2 – Confuse
Fred’s Point of View
‘I missed you’
‘I’m so sorry’
Until now it’s echoing in my head! Why he takes so long? I’ve waited him for a long time but now he’s coming back without saying? Tsk.. I thought I already forgot him.
I came back to my mind when I heard something. I checked the time and it’s already 3 am in the morning. I wear my boxer shorts since I’m naked! It feels comfortable to me when I’m sleeping alone.
I gently went down to at the stairs and I saw Jano looking for the kitchen, He seems like a witness for a crime, hiding at the crime scene
It made me laugh at this moment.
I quietly step down at the stairs, I’d like to surprised him but I don’t know I wasn’t in my mood to do it so I come to his back and whispered to his right ear.
“Who are you looking at?”
But I surprised when he answered me.
“I’m just checking if Fre...” I smiled when he realized that I am here “Oh! Fred!”
“Oh! It’s you sir!”
He just said, I saw him like he’s embarrassed so I smiled at him.
“Why do you still up?”
I ask him as if I were concerned on him, but yeah! We had class later and yet he’s still awake.
I really can’t explain myself, I always smiling when I’m seeing him like this, he looks cute little weirdo.
“Am—I-I just amm, nothing! I couldn’t sleep at all! You sir? Why you still up?”
I walk at the kitchen and straight up into the fridge to get some water.
“I told you! You don’t have to call me sir!”
“Sorry- I just amm, I’m not to used it!”
But I’m not comfortable to call me sir. Tss
I give him a glass of water and I sit at the chair,
“Me too, I can’t sleep”
I simply said.
He also sits at the chair and then I’m in shock when I heard him “Is it because of that guy?”
I smile a little bit and at the same time I felt sorry for him, I don’t know but when I saw his expression when Jonas kissed me, I feel like I betrayed him.
“mmm Maybe? Maybe that’s the other one”
I directly said to him. I looked at his eyes and trying to give him a nice smile but I failed, I guess I looked horrible in this bitter smile.
I wish that he’s the one who kissed me earlier. I hope he’s the one who missed me.
“... And the other one is...” I continued, but he looked at me, his precious lips, his nose, chins, eyes and everything. I’m thinking of that.
“I missed something” I said when I remembered kissing him at his cheeks.. I winked and I saw his eyes were getting wide, he’s blushing. I chuckle a little bit. He’s cute and pretty.
“I-I think I have to go first!”
He quickly said and stood up.
Out of the blue, I felt something in my heart and it was like there’s someone who pinched on it. I feel sad and alone.
I don’t know but my hands are automatically moved and grab his hand!
“Don’t!” Please?
I want you to stay here...
Please?
But I came back in my mind and I feel shy.
I quickly think something an excuse and I said.
“You’re too young!”
Fuck! What am I saying?
Then he pulled his hand away from mine.
“psh. Talk to your self!” Then he walked out.
But my body and foot strangely follow him, and then I found my self hugging him.
“SO-sorry!”
Sorry if I let you seeing me with another man.
“I don’t know but I feel like I have to say sorry! Maybe because I just want it to say? I’m sorry! I really, really am sorry! So just please! Accept my apologized like you just want it too."
I sincerely said
I don’t know what’s happening but...
But.. I really don’t know!
Maybe because, I really like him or I...
I love him?
... As a friend?
I hugged him tight and literally I feel his Heart beat, it’s too fast and I guess we’re the same. I hope I we could sleep like this.
It took me a minute in just position, I couldn’t stop my self, I’m freaking need this for now.
Apparently, for some reason, the moment was ruined when I felt something in my down.
I smiled a bit,. Fuck Fred, seriously at this kind of the moment?
Jano is unbelievable. He could make me hard by just hugging at him? He doesn’t need to compare at the others who doesn’t have a sex appeal. Wicked haha.
I gently move my arms and looked at him.
“I can’t sleep maybe because... of this?” then I look down.
And Ghad! I saw him shocked again, How many times do I say that he’s freaking cute with that expressions.
I saw him blushing and I found it fun so I hold his should and slowly move my head to tease him.
But suddenly, I loose control, shit! am I gonna kiss him?
I saw his angelic charming face and his freaking soft lips.
Fuck! I can’t stop my self!
Please! Jano slap me!
I shouted in my head. But fuck! He closed his eyes!
What the hell?
But unexpectedly happened! Someone’s flashing in my head..
And it’s Jonas while his eyes were closed.
I forcedly close my eyes and
“Goodnight!” whispered at him and straight up in my room.
I slammed the door and directly jump at the bed!
Fuck! SHIT! What was that?
I felt something pain. Why is that?
‘I can’t kiss him’
Then my tears came out in my eyes, I feel it’s warm and full of pain.
Fuck! Why!
Why does he show up like that?
And my tears were continuously falls down.