Chapter twenty five

Chapter twenty five

Chapter twenty five

Ethan

I'm actually really good at reading people.

When you run one of the most successful security agencies, learning how to read people is a ‘must have skill’. That’s how you spot threats quickly and eliminate them. Which was why it was strange to admit that I was wrong about Kira.

When all the flirty, irritating personality was stripped away, I realized she was just a girl who had learned to perfect her mask. She was just a regular girl who was afraid of her family finding out about her sexuality.

Also, she was really fun to be with. We’ve chatted for so long that I had lost track of time.

Granted, she’d done most of the talking. I had just listened and laughed when I needed to. She provided what I wanted when I decided to let her in hours ago. A distraction.

My mind wandered back to my first impression of her, I almost hit myself for been such a jerk. She'd learned how to wear her mask properly, just like I did most of the time.

For a fleeting moment, I wondered what would happen if I let my own mask fall in front of the world, in front of my family and friends. I doubt they’d still treat me the same if they realized I was literally dying.

Maybe some masks are meant to be worn forever. It made things easier that way. Because when the mask falls, the people we care about will see the broken pieces we tried to hide, and they may not like it. And that would only break us more. It’s better to be safe than regretful.

“...I swear, my entire face turned green. It was the worst Christmas ever. Some extended family still call me ‘Broccoli’ to this day.” Kira laughed.

I had trailed off in the middle of the conversation and hadn’t heard half of what she said. But she’d seem so excited discussing it and I didn’t want to seem like a jerk now when we’d been having so much fun, so I laughed too. And to be honest, the nickname was hilarious.

Kira’s brows furrowed as she stared at me. “Don’t know which one is more fake. Buffy’s face or your laughter.” she scoffed as she took a long swig of the drink.

“Don’t you think your aunt would find it offending that you’re calling her face fake?” I arched an eyebrow.

“Not if it’s true. We, Darlingtons, don’t deny that we got work done. Trust me, there is an ongoing competition between my aunt and my mum about who’s had the most plastic surgery. My aunt has the winning streak but my mother is determined to break it.” she chuckled.

“Wow, you have an…interesting family.” I said for lack of better words.

I didn't know much about the Darlingtons except the surface knowledge. Old money. Owner of most clothing businesses. Just a normal boring New York rich family. I didn't find them interesting enough to look into.

“You can say it. They suck. I say it all the time too.” Kira dropped her glass on the coffee table and sigh loudly.

“I don't know what to do. A part of me wants to come out to them but I know it'll end badly. Mum is already picking out my wedding dresses. I don't know how to tell her I don't even want to get married.” she

“I think you should tell your family the truth. They might actually take the news well.” I said.

She shook her head. “Everytime I imagine the conversation, it always ends badly.”

“That's the thing about our imagination. It scares us more than the actual thing. You'll never know until you actually do it. Why not just rip the band aid off and deal with the consequences later? Even if it turns out badly, at least you'll be rid of the burden of lying to them.”

I found myself contemplating my own words. Would it really be that easy to just come clean to everyone? I've been hiding my health condition for almost two years now, but there had been no specific countdown back then.

Now, the doctors were sure I had roughly six months left if I didn't regain my memories. Wouldn't it be better if I just told everyone and we all try to muddle through my brain together?

But I knew it wasn't going to be that easy. It would only hurt them more if they couldn't save me. Maybe the silence was better.

If I kept my mask up, no one would notice as I slowly faded away. I just hoped at the end, I didn't lose the memories of the dearest people to me.

“You've been of great help to me, Ethan. Thank you. Again, I'm really sorry for what I did earlier, the telling your neighbor we were dating, and assuming you and Jenna dated. That was really shitty of me.” she said.

“It's fine.”

Kira stood from the couch and grabbed her purse. “Well, I should get going. It's getting late.”

“I'll walk you.” I said, standing up too.

I walked her to the door and watched as she stepped into elevator. My eyes went to Millie's door. I contemplated going to speak to her. If anything, I needed to apologize for my behavior towards her last night, and maybe a little bit of explanation for my weird attitude yesterday.

I wasn't going to tell her about the headaches, of course. But I didn't want her thinking I didn't want to kiss her. God knows, I wanted nothing more than to be able to claim her as mine again.

I walked to her door and rang the doorbell. I waited for a few seconds but got no response. Then I rang it again. Still no response.

It was pretty late in the night. Millie hated going out in the night. She would never go out this late. Of course, it was entirely possible that she had fallen asleep, or that she was in the shower. But I couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong.

The memory of how panicked her face was earlier today flashed across my mind. Or maybe I was just paranoid because my father was still on the run. I didn't want to take any chances on the safety of the people close to me.

I dialed her number immediately. I've had her contact for a while now but I've never contacted her. Maybe because I knew she would block my number immediately. The call went straight to voicemail. So did the other calls after that.

Okay, something was clearly wrong.

I sent her a few text messages, but none of them was answered. As a last resolve, I decided to call Dallas. There was a chance she'd gone over to her place. I just needed to know.

Dallas picked up after a few rings.

“Hey, Ethan! What's up?”

“Hi! I'm fine. I want to ask if Mil…” I paused. Dallas didn't know her by that name. “...if Heather is with you.”

“No, she's not here. Is everything okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, everything is fine. I just…” Damn! I really should have thought this through before calling her.

“Ethan?”

“There's no problem. I just noticed she wasn't home and was concerned since it's so late. She doesn't usually stay out so late.” I finally said.

“Well, it's a Friday night. She went out to have some fun. Not sure if she'll be coming home tonight though.” She snorted.

The paranoia was immediately replaced by an ugly feeling that I didn't want to put a name to. Friday night fun usually includes a night club or alcohol.

“Oh, that's nice then.” I said half heatedly. I rushed my words before I could think much of it.

“Do you know where exactly she is?” I hoped my question sounded as casual as I wanted it to.

“Some bar called Benny's. I think it's just a few minutes drive away from your place.” she said.

I knew where Benny's was. I had been there many times before and knew the type of people that went there. I liked the club so much that when I had saved it from going out of business last year. I was their biggest investor.

The ugly feeling seemed to consume my chest. I had no doubt she had gone there because she believed Kira was my girlfriend.

“Alright, thanks. Good night.” I said. She muttered her response and we ended the call.

I went back to my apartment and grabbed my car keys and jacket. I didn't know what I was going to do when I got to Benny's, I just knew I had to go. It's not like I could grab her and drag her back to her apartment like a caveman.

I made the journey to the club in ten minutes instead of fifteen. As expected, it was packed with people. It would take a while before I find her, that's if she hadn't left. My chest tightened at the thought.

I convinced myself that I was only searching for her to ensure she was safe, but deep down, I knew it was more than that. I couldn't stand to see Millie with anyone else.

It didn't matter that so many years had passed since we were a couple, or tha I was literally dying everytime we were close. I wanted her. I've always wanted her and I think I always will.

It's not that I didn't want her to be happy. I wanted her to have all the happiness in the world, and I knew I couldn't give her that. I guess that's what hurts the most. Maybe seeing her happy with someone else would be enough to let her go.

Turns out, seeing her with someone else wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I didn't h
ave to search the entire club before I found her, sitting at the bar, and kissing a man.

My entire world stopped.