Chapter 57 Only you
JAXON’S POV
I stood rooted to the spot, unraveling my thoughts one after the other until it became a heavy weight in my chest.
Exhaling loudly, I punched the space between my brows in frustration, muttering to myself, “This is wrong, this is so wrong.”
The sound of wobbling footsteps reached me then, and I lifted my gaze to see Nancy, standing at the top of the stairs.
“Mr Landon, is that you?” She called out, as though she was just seeing me.
Well, technically, it wasn't like she had actually seen me earlier. Even if she had, there was no guarantee that she remembered that interaction or would remember this either.
My attention, however, wasn't focused on her face, but on her feet that hovered dangerously on the edge of the topmost stairs.
Still wobbling, she grabbed the railing and then stepped forward, covering the first step.
I took an involuntary step forward, focusing on her movement while also actively stopping myself from running towards her.
My reason was that I could startle her and cause a fall that wouldn’t have happened otherwise.
Slowly but evidently determined, Nancy made her way down until she was standing right in front of me.
Her body wavered again, and then her lips tugged back into a wide grin. “It’s really you.”
“Mr Landon.”
“What are you doing out here?” I frowned.
When I left her room, I hadn’t imagined that she would walk out here all by herself or that she was even capable of doing so, but here she was, with a blinding smile that made every word of chastisement fizzle out in my throat.
“You should head back to your room,” I said, reaching out to grab her shoulder.
She evaded my touch, swinging her arm out of reach, but it also caused her to stagger backwards.
Surprised, I glanced at her face, only to see that her smile had disappeared. It was now replaced by a hard and cold stare that had me taken aback.
“What is it?” I asked, brows knitting.
“You left.”
“I left?” I repeated, confused.
“This morning, you left me alone. You didn’t even tell me you were leaving,” she heaved out in one single breath, chest rising and falling like that of one who held great grievance.
I really wasn’t expecting her to say that.
Truthfully, I didn’t think she cared.
It was undeniable what happened between us last night, but based on what was said before it, I didn’t think it would matter if she woke up and couldn't find me in the morning.
Moreover, I’d left in a hurry.
That, however, didn't mean I couldn’t have woken her.
I could have bitten for some reason, but I didn’t.
Maybe because I felt too ashamed and guilty to face her.
“Where did you go?” She continued with a gaze that didn’t let up.
I took a step towards her, to offer what I thought would suffice as an explanation, when she suddenly said, “You were disgusted, weren’t you?”
“What?” I voiced in astonishment.
“Was the sex so bad that you couldn’t wait to leave, or was it that you thought me even less than a whore?”
“What are you talking about?” My brow knitted harder.
She stared at me without answering for a minute, then something even more shocking happened.
Her eyes turned misty.
And no, it wasn’t the alcohol. It was genuine tears.
It left me flummoxed.
“If you really hated me that much, then you shouldn’t have had sex with me.”
“I don’t hate you…” I hurried to explain, but she interrupted me before I could finish.
“You don’t have to spell it out. Why else would you leave right after we had sex?”
She sniffled then inhaled loudly, “Don’t worry, I know my place now. I know now that you were only humoring me when you made that arrangement.”
“I know there are other women in your life, and I don’t doubt that they are beautiful and more…more curvier than I am.”
Trust me when I say I stood there, frozen like a statue.
Every word she’d said to me was unexpected and had me rooted to the spot.
“I don’t hate you.”
I don't know why that was the first thing I negated.
Maybe because the thought of her thinking I hated her filled me with so much discomfort, I just had to change the narrative.
“Really?” Her pupils enlarged disbelievingly.
“I don’t hate you,” I repeated, firmly this time.
Her face seemed to relax with relief, but before I could fully ascertain that, it drew tight again. “So you do have other women.”
I couldn’t believe my ears, and it clicked then that she was in her own little world and I…I was a villain in that world who would have sex with a woman I hated while also having multiple women.
It couldn’t be further from the truth.
Little did she know that she was the only woman in my life.
“The only woman in my life,” I repeated to myself. I’d never known those were words I could utter, not just to her but to any other woman.
It, however, was even more astonishing that it had become a title for her. Never in a million years could I have imagined that possible.
“The only woman…”
My gaze lifted when she repeated that, and I saw her mumble it to herself a couple more times, as though she didn’t fully understand what it meant yet.
About a minute later, her eyes widened again, this time with shock. “Did you just say I’m the only woman in your life?”
I stared at her dumbstruck face without responding, then, based entirely on impulse, I closed the distance between us and reached out to grab her neck, pulling her into me. “What, did you think there was someone else?”
“I…I thought…You said…”
I stared at her for a while, watching her eyes flicker in confusion. Then, my hand tightened around her nape and drew her in even closer, then closed my lips over hers, muttering, “You’re the only one.”