"MAREN!" Mom's voice rang out. It must be time for supper.
I broke from my memory and realized how hungry I was. My appetite seems to be the most reliable thing in my life right now. I was sunken so far into the snow that I left a deep impression and struggled to come to my feet as snow clung to the fur of my cat. Catching a weft of buttery rosemary, I followed the trail inside. I hung my coat over the armchair by the fireplace to help dry it, then was captivated by the feast that was placed on our live edge table. Glazed baby carrots smelled of sugary allspice, cooked baby redskins potatoes were herbed and peppered and garnished with fresh parsley. A golden browned turkey sat as the centerpiece, adorned with sprigs of rosemary which fragranced the air as steam floated from it. It took a massive bird to feed all nine of us at once, but sitting with everyone felt so wholesome. I savored every bite that hit my palate. Mom had some cooking skills, but she also had help, usually everyone worked in unison to set the table when supper was complete, it would get crowded yet I found it comfortable to bump elbows with others, just like we did as we sat to eat. We really should get a bigger table.My recollection of wonderful memories piqued my curiosity about my guardian wolf. I haven't seen him in nearly five years and I felt a longing to catch another glimpse of his elegant beauty.
"Mom, Dad," I began my sentence hoping for more information, "do you know when the black wolf will return? Are his duties elsewhere complete yet?"
There was a pause in everyone's eating, I held my breath for a response.
"Soon, sweetheart. It's almost time for him to return." Mom had a way of comforting me when she spoke, her voice was pleasant and loving.
"What exactly does that mean? What are we waiting for?" Puzzled, I could only hope to receive more than the usual vague responses.
"When the time comes, Maren, you'll know." Dad joined in as I rolled my eyes with frustration.
*There he goes with his nondescript responses! Never any real answer, I think he just likes to keep me guessing sometimes. I'm not a child anymore, I wish he would just quit it with the mystery. *
**It's for your own protection. How do I tell you? How can I explain in a way that you won't challenge everything I say and run off and put yourself at risk?
Dad's voice trailed off. **
"Dad, I know you love me, I know you want to protect me, but I'm not a child anymore and I promise not to put myself in danger." I tried to reason with him, but honestly, it was time to allow me to make some decisions for myself…
**You're not ready yet, please slow down.**
"There are things at play here, Maren, things you don't even understand yet, dangers that you don't know about yet." Dad's eyes remained soft but fixed as he justified himself.
**And he's still just a boy in so many ways!**
"Dad, I can't slow down. My being kept in the dark my entire life has not helped either. How do you expect me to understand things if you don't explain?" My eyes were welling at the thought of everything that's been hidden from me for so long. I can't differentiate truth from lies most of the time, and I've just been left to discover things for myself, then forced to keep them secret.
**She will have to know everything soon, honey.**
I turned to mom and nodded with appreciation for her contribution.
**But the boy isn't ready! He can barely handle himself let alone accept his destiny. How can he ever be what Maren will need? Dad adamantly argued back with mom.**
"Who? What do you mean, what I need?" I was ready for answers, but didn't realize that I hadn't actually seen either of their mouths move.
The room suddenly filled with gasps. I was actually startled by it, looking at each person's expressions one by one.
**YES!** Kendrick's voice rang out first.
**I knew it!** Ella confidently whispered as Alma retorted:
**WE knew it. The Great Witch left us clues, that's why Kendrick is here. Alma, always so rational, haha.**
**Now you've done it, Zeke. I told you to watch what you said and thought until we knew more!** Mom was actually scolding dad, she used his name instead of a pet name…
I turned to dad, waiting for his retort.
**None of this is my fault, Jolie!** Oh he used her real name right back, this is golden. Except it's a distraction from what's really going on here.
*Can someone just answer me?! It's so loud in here, I can't think!*
It was just then that I realized, neither my mother, nor my father, had moved their mouths to speak. This time I was certain of it.
*Seriously, what the hell is going on? I can't. Is something wrong with my head, or are my eyes deceiving me?* The room around me began to tilt and spin, my head felt like it could float right off my shoulders.
**Oh no, you guys, Maren is feeling it! Ella recognized my plight.**
**Master!** Alma stood up and came to my side, along with Ella, Mom, and Kendrick. My hands were on my temples now, both of my index fingers massaging them in an attempt to relieve the dizzying effects of all the noise.
**Oh, honey! Take deep breaths, don't panic!** Mom's voice was reassuring but the pressure in my head was mounting.
**This isn't my doing, this is his doing.** Dad is still cryptically referring to…
**Maren, sweetheart, please focus on the room around you instead of everyone else. Listen to the hiss of the steam coming from the kettle on the stove. Listen to the creaking of the floor beneath you. Listen past them to block them out.**
As I looked up to Mom, her face still but full of delight, the realization of what was happening was making me ill.
**She’s in my head, they're all in my head! This is insane, it's so loud.**
Just then, I could feel something building in my chest. I was suffocating on all the movement and clatter about me, and I felt the need to burst out of it. Feeling as though I had been holding my breath in the depths of the ocean, I couldn't take it anymore. The need to come up for air overcame me as I drew my hands from my temples, tightening them into fists. I rose from my seat, and simultaneously slammed my fists down on both sides of my plates.
"ENOUGH!" My voice echoed through the entire house with a bang.
A wave of energy thrust out from where my fists connected with the table, growing larger like rings atop a pond when a raindrop breaks its surface tension. Everyone in the room was hit by the wave, first everyone close to me and then those further away. The impact visibly pushed them back a few inches, where they froze in place, with a look of absolute shock on their faces.The house buzzed on its foundation causing the front door to slam open, the sound shocking me out of my daze. I stood in a pause and looked around at everyone, frozen silently in place. The door was the only thing that moved, swinging wildly with the wind.
"Shhhhhushhhh, shhhush." The wind whispered to me. A small gust flew into the doorway, carrying a few leaves and a bit of grass, along with a weft of hibiscus and sandalwood. I closed my eyes and breathed it in, as deeply as I could, just as I always do. It's almost like the tiny particles absorbed into my bloodstream along with the oxygen in the air. I could almost feel them circulating in my body and envisioned them as tiny bursts of colors, glittering throughout my being. It felt so wholesome, calming, and just purely joyful. I focused on the happiness welling within, filling up the empty, cavernous hole of pain that every heartache ever left until it bubbled out of me in the form of breathy laughter. I opened my eyes to the glorious sight of my guardian wolf, his body filling the doorway. The chill was now squeezing in, but the wolf's body heat was radiant, his breath nearly visible as he panted, eyes fixed on me. I noticed him taking me in, from head to toe, panting increasingly more heavily.
"I've missed seeing you." I could think of nothing better to say, in my excitement. I turned to everyone, ready to share how happy I was with them, but realized quickly that they were still suspended in place.
"Well?" I questioned what to do out loud, but didn't expect everyone to suddenly snap out of their poses.
In unison, they all tilted their heads in a bow. I've had about enough of this "master" garbage…
Fatigue struck me like a freight train. I could barely utter a word, when I realized that everyone was looking past me, not at me as they raised their heads back up. With the last push of energy that I could muster, I turned around in time to see the black wolf heading back towards the thick woods. Is he “master”?
The room closed in around me, as everyone rushed towards me. I could see their faces, some concerned and some delighted, all hovering while everything faded into darkness.