CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

We got to the entrance and my brain couldn’t understand what was going on, was this really Sebastian? His aura felt like someone else, he had a fiery eye, but he was as stable as ever, his poised demeanour didn’t waver not for an instant. I wanted to ask him again about what had happened where he went to? But after his previous reply I couldn't. I really wanted to know why he was this way but I couldn’t. My body yearned for the Sebastian I knew the one I was free with and I could blurt out everything on my mind without fear. But, this Sebastian in front of me was so scary that I was already fidgeting from his sight.

I was lost in my thoughts when I heard his voice “Will you just stand there? Or you’ll let us leave?” he asked, maintaining his strict face without smiling. I walked dejectedly towards the car. My heartbeat raced as I moved towards him, everything was wrong, the sweet Sebastian that I adored, the sweet Sebastian that I wanted to spend time with, the Sebastian that I hoped for his return, the one I craved was gone and the one with me was a different Sebastian. His words ripped through my soul as I made my way into the car and he purred the car to life as he drove out of the compound.

For several minutes, I hoped he would look into my eyes and say something but no he said nothing and he maintained his strict gaze as he focused on the road, I tried to speak but I was too scared to speak a lot of thoughts raced through my mind what if he really dumps me in the middle of nowhere and zooms off all because I asked a question? What if he leaves forever without turning back? Would I lose Sebastian too because I was not patient enough to wait for him? All these thoughts stopped me from speaking to him. I just sat there focusing on the road.

I wondered what had happened where he went to? Why didn’t he tell me about Ayesha? Why was he behaving so differently, I thought to myself as the silence in the car inconvenienced me a lot and I couldn’t take it. I deserved to know what was going on. He couldn’t continue to treat me like someone on the side, hiding everything from me and leaving me in the dark about his reality and even my own reality. I would rather stop going with him, than to put up with the charade of being comfortable with everything that was going on.

The drive was really boring, frustrating and scary. We continued to manoeuvre and make turns through different valleys and streets, and it wasn’t like we would stop anytime soon. I summoned up the courage to speak to him. The worst he could do was drop me and continue his journey without me. I was really scared and my voice was shaking as I spoke to him “Sebastian, why are you behaving this way? Since you came back you’ve changed. Please tell me what’s wrong?” I said pleading, while I looked into his eyes searching for any signs of empathy and compassion. But to my surprise, even after everything I said he didn’t say anything, not even a word and he just continued driving facing the road without even stealing a glance at me.

I was angry and furious, “what was really happening? Did I do anything wrong? Why is he behaving this way towards me?” I couldn’t bear It I had to make him speak to me at all costs. The drive was taking very long and we’ve travelled a very long distance from where we were or so I thought. “Sebastian, Stop the car!” I said, the first time, but he didn’t flinch. “Sebastian stop this goddamn car!!” I said screaming, this time I certainly got his attention this time as the car suddenly came to a halt and he averted his gaze to me. This time his hard gaze softened and he spoke with a soft voice “what’s wrong why did you ask me to stop the car?” he asked.

“Please unlock the car and let me out.” I said. “Why would you do that?” Sebastian asked. “We’ve been on a journey I know nothing about. You barely said anything and you maintained a strict face. Do you know how worried I was yesterday about your safety? And you came back and shouted at me to get into the car and you just kept on driving without saying anything to me? Does that make any sense to you? Do I look like a joke to you? someone you can treat how you want? Someone you can play mind games with? You didn’t give me any explanation of what happened yesterday and I don’t even know where we’re going. If you don’t trust me with things, why would you keep me with you? You barely tell me anything and you expect me to respect that and continue staying by your side respecting all these and do nothing, no I won’t I’m done with all your shenanigans. It’s either you tell me what really happened or I leave this car right now? I want the full story right now, choose it’s either the secret or me. It’s all on you now.” I said, I knew I said too much and I knew he cared about me but why was he keeping everything a secret from me? This made my mind unstable and it made me vent out my anger in the worst manner. I loved talking when I was angry and sometimes, I say too much but this time I think it was worth it, he was moved and I think I’ll get to know what was going on right now. Who are those after us and why are they after us? Why were they targeting him? I wanted to know.