Chapter 175 Perhaps Death Is the Only Release
He carried Caroline upstairs with painstaking care, settling her onto the soft mattress. Her face looked bloodless in sleep, features drawn tight with exhaustion. Something cold and heavy settled in his chest as he watched her.
He sat at her bedside for a long time, waiting until he was certain she wouldn't wake. Only then did he force himself to stand and leave the room.
Downstairs, the living room was brightly lit.
Alexander sank onto the sofa. After a moment of silence, he pulled out his cigarette case, extracted one, and lit it.
Smoke curled through the air, but the nicotine didn't bring its usual numbing relief.
His mind remained a chaotic tangle. Thoughts tangled endlessly, impossible to unravel.
At the core of it all, he simply couldn't find a way to atone for what he'd done.
Several doctors and nurses stood quietly nearby, barely daring to breathe.
"Is there..." Alexander finally spoke. "Any other option that actually works?"
The medical team exchanged uneasy glances. No one wanted to be the first to answer.
Finally, the lead physician drew a deep breath and steeled himself.
"Mr. Hamilton, we've discussed this extensively. Mrs. Hamilton's case is extraordinarily complex. Even though the hypnosis has temporarily suppressed the overt symptoms of her dissociative disorder, allowing her to function as Edith, psychological trauma is the hardest thing to treat. The roots of her condition run deep. The trauma is severe. It's manifested as serious somatization that's affecting her physical health."
He paused, glancing at Alexander's darkening expression before continuing.
"And the ongoing physical weakness and pain will, in turn, exacerbate her psychological symptoms. It's a vicious cycle. Given her current physical state and the pregnancy, we can't risk using any other powerful psychotropic medications. Beyond what we did today—administering minimal sedatives during episodes to ease her suffering and prevent her from harming herself or the fetus—we're... we're truly..."
His voice faltered. The rest seemed impossible to say.
Alexander's fingers tightened around his cigarette. Ash fell onto the carpet.
He stared at the doctor, words grinding out between clenched teeth. "Finish it."
The physician swallowed hard and closed his eyes.
"There may be one other path. But the risk is extreme."
"Which path?"
"End the hypnosis." The doctor opened his eyes, meeting Alexander's gaze with something complicated flickering in his own. "Let Mrs. Hamilton return to her original identity and memories. Let her remember who she is, what she's been through, why she's in pain."
Alexander's fist slammed into the coffee table. Glass shattered.
"What the hell did you just say?!"
The doctor watched Alexander's face transform, cold sweat sliding down his neck.
"At least... if she experiences this suffering as Caroline, she'll understand where it's coming from. Right now, as Edith, she's passively enduring pain she can't comprehend. Understanding the source might give her subconscious something to fight back against, rather than being completely helpless. The process would be agonizing, but it's one possible way to break this unsolvable cycle..."
"You son of a bitch!"
Before the doctor could finish, Alexander was on his feet.
He threw down his cigarette and lunged forward, fisting his hand in the doctor's collar.
"That's your solution? End the hypnosis? Make her remember? Do you have any idea what that means?! That's throwing her back into hell! That's killing her!"
"Look at her right now! She can barely handle the slightest trigger! You want her to remember what happened? Remember what I did to her? Are you trying to speed up her death?!"
He yanked the doctor's collar tight, cutting off his air.
But something complex flashed in the physician's eyes. He gathered his courage and pressed on.
"Mr. Hamilton, I know the risk is enormous. But if we continue like this, Mrs. Hamilton won't survive. Today's chest pain is just the beginning. Next time it could be suffocation, full-body agony, even psychogenic paralysis. Her body and mind will be completely destroyed by this sourceless suffering. Eventually, even if she doesn't take her own life, the sustained psychosomatic stress response could trigger an actual heart attack or organ failure... and then there truly will be nothing we can do."
"Shut up! Shut your goddamn mouth!"
Alexander shoved the doctor backward violently.
The man stumbled and crashed to the floor, gasping in pain, his vision dimming. He couldn't get up.
The other doctors and nurses went white with terror, rushing forward to help him.
Someone pleaded through tears, "Stop! Doctor, please, don't say anything else!"
The lead physician struggled to sit up with his colleagues' help.
He looked at Alexander, barely holding himself together, and something even more complicated crossed his face.
He pushed away the supporting hands. Summoning every ounce of courage he had left, he raised his head to meet Alexander's eyes.
"Mr. Hamilton, in some countries and regions, there are legal provisions for euthanasia. For patients tortured by severe psychological and psychiatric conditions, who can neither truly live nor die..."
Alexander's body went rigid.
The physician dropped his gaze, shame written across his features. "I know that as a doctor, I shouldn't say these things. It violates my oath and every ethical principle. But I've seen too many patients destroyed by this kind of suffering. Reduced to something that's neither living nor dead. Sometimes... sometimes death really is a mercy. I'm just... I'm laying out all the possibilities for you."
"Get out!" Alexander roared.
He grabbed a heavy brass ornament from the side table and raised it over his head, ready to bring it down on the doctor.
"Sir! Calm down! Sir!"
Liam, who'd been standing nearby, threw himself forward and locked both arms around Alexander's, shouting at the frozen medical staff.
"What are you waiting for?! Get him out of here! Don't let him say another word! Move!"
Several security guards rushed in, half-dragging, half-carrying the lead physician and the rest of the medical team out of the living room.
Silence finally descended.
Alexander stood there, chest heaving, body shaking.
"Sir, don't listen to him! He's talking nonsense! Mrs. Hamilton is going to be fine! We'll find another way. There has to be another way..."
Alexander didn't respond.
He remained frozen in Liam's grip, completely still.
The brass guardian angel sculpture slipped from his fingers and hit the floor with a dull thud.
Slowly, he lowered his head and stared at the hands that had almost committed violence again.