Chapter 201 - Fading

Chapter 201 - Fading
Margot's POV

I watched it happen in real time.

The shift.

The snap.

One second he was sitting beside me, tense but controlled... and the next... 

He was on his feet.

All self restraint gone.

It was like watching a storm roll in without warning, his entire body tightening with rage as he dragged a hand through his hair and began pacing the small space.

Back and forth.

Once.

Twice.

The energy in the room shifted instantly, thick and sharp, pressing in on my already fragile nerves.

And yet...

I believed what he'd said.

Every word he'd said about Addison, I felt was the truth. 

The way he spoke.

The way his eyes held mine.

There was no hesitation.

No flicker of guilt.

No lie.

But that didn't mean it didn't hurt.

Because it did.

More than I expected it to.

Knowing he'd once shared something with someone else...

Something I had never shared with anyone...

Something I had always imagined would mean something more when that first time would come... 

Wasn't sex supposed to be something special? 

Something... earned? 

My fingers curled slightly into the duvet as I watched him pace, the slight jealousy and ache settling in my heart. 

But I couldn't be angry at him for that.

Not really... 

Because it was before me.

Before us.

And truthfully...

We weren't even an official couple, which only made everything feel more complicated.

"Coban... sit back down, please..." I said gently, hoping for the best.

It felt like approaching a wild animal that could bolt or bite at any second, and like I suspected, he didn't listen the first time around... 

Of course he didn't.

He paced again, faster this time, his jaw clenched so tight that he could have broke his damn teeth. 

"Coban, come on..." I tried again, firmer. "We've barely even scratched the surface of everything we're trying to fix and you're already angry..."

That made him stop.

Abruptly.

Turning to face me now, with his expression still burning - eyes still lit with a new fire. 

"Do you blame me?!" he snapped, as I pulled the duvet up over my legs a little more, needing a distraction. 

His voice wasn't directed at me exactly - but it still made me tense. 

"I won't have that bitch filling your head with shit and threatening you!" he continued, his hands flexing out at his sides. "She needs to be told the truth - she needs to understand that I think she's nothing more than an annoying fucking whore!"

I nodded slowly at what he was saying, letting him get it out.

Because interrupting him now? Trying to question him now? That would only make it worse.

"I don't want more problems on top of what we already have," I said once he paused for a breath. "Let's fix this first... fix us first... please?"

My voice softened on that last word, 'please'. 

A quiet plea to him to listen... 

And to my surprise, it actually worked.

Barely, but it done the trick... 

He groaned, dragging both hands down his face like he was trying to physically wipe the anger away himself. 

"Fine!" he hissed. "But I'm not letting this go - you know that? She won't get away with threatening you." Coban ensured, as I simply gave a small nod.

I did know that... he would never let things go... no matter how much I begged him to. 

He moved back to the bed then, dropping down beside me again, the mattress dipping under him as he shifted to get as comfortable as he could.

Still tense.

Still wound tight.

But at least he was back here, and not running up the hallways in search of Addison... 

"If you say she doesn't matter to you anymore..." I started carefully, watching him from the corner of my eye, "then I believe you."

I meant it too. I really did want to believe him. 

To move past this. 

But he quickly let out a frustrated breath.

"Anymore?" he repeated, turning his head sharply toward me. "She never mattered to me at all - that's the whole fucking point." He corrected me, as I shook my head gently. 

"Okay..." I murmured. 

Then, before I could stop myself, I had to ask... 

"But do I matter to you?" The words slipped out quieter than everything else.

But they hit him loud. 

His reaction was instant.

His head snapped toward me fully now, eyes wide.

"Yeah," he said immediately. "Of course you fucking matter. Or I wouldn't be trying this hard to fix our shit!" 

There was no hesitation. No doubt. As I drank back each and every word - pocketing it in my memory. 

"I don't go around asking to start a life with just any girl I meet," he added, his tone set - almost offended that I'd asked the question. 

And maybe I shouldn't have? But I'm glad I did. I needed to hear it. To hear him say that I mattered to him. 

Selfishly... or desperately? Both. 

"And... you mean it this time?" I asked him, my voice softer now, more vulnerable than I wanted it to be. "Because I can't keep up with you switching up on me like you have... my head can't take it."

I shifted slightly closer to him without even realising.

Drawn in... 

Wanting his reassurance... 

Needing it.

"Margot..." he started, his voice dropping.

And something about the way he said my name, guiltily made my heart flutter. 

"Nothing in this life has ever mattered to me as much as you." He admitted, as my breath caught.

"I knew you were different from the first night I met you," he continued, his eyes locked onto mine, steady and certain. "I've tested you. Pushed you. Put you through shit most people would've walked away from after the first day..."

A small, almost disbelieving breath left him as he laughed slightly... "And yet, you're still here."

I didn't move.

Didn't speak.

Couldn't.

"It's a fucking miracle," he added quietly. "But I've figured something out..."

His gaze softened slightly, eyeing me over.

"What's that?" I whisper, hanging on his every word. 

"You're the only one who can handle me... maybe you were made for me..." The words settled past his lips, and I felt it again... 

That pull between us. 

That undeniable pull toward him.

Even after everything.

Even after the pain.

He still had me.

Completely.

"So..." I whispered, my voice barely there, "you want us to try being... official?"

The question hung between us.

But it was important.

He didn't answer straight away.

Instead- 

His hand lifted slowly, brushing against my bruised cheek.

His touch was warm and careful. So different from the storm he'd been only seconds ago.

"We were official the second you walked into this cell, Bella..." he murmured.

My heart stuttered.

"Always mine." The words should've scared me, but I foolishly loved it. 

And before I could process anything- 

He leaned in, and his lips crashed against mine.

Hard.

Decisive.

Like he needed it.

Like he needed me.

And just like that, every question...

Every doubt...

Every problem we still hadn't worked through...

Faded away into the background.